Only Angel [h.s]

𝟭𝟵 - 𝗘𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲'𝘀 𝗪𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over before it began
Keep your drink, just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight

[U + Ur Hand
P!nk]

You should definitely play the song when you see the • :)

—————

Present day

"Red or black?"

I stare at both of the stunning dresses laid out on the hotel bed with my eyebrows furrowed. The ruby red dress is a skintight latex dress with a bra-like top half, the black dress is a lot more simple, a short, long sleeved, velvet dress with a small slit. If I wanted to show off and attract attention, the red dress would be perfect but the black dress seems a lot more calmer, and honestly in my comfort zone.

I look at the dresses with a sigh before moving them aside to flop down on the bed with my phone in my hand.

After my oh so refreshing nap earlier, I woke up to a friendly text from Theo asking if I wanted to come out and join him and Juliette at a club tonight to get me out of my depressive slump, naturally, I wasted no time in saying yes, I got a shower and did my makeup straight after. I've been cooped up in this hotel room for days by myself, there's no way I would pass up the opportunity to go out, socialise, see my friends and most importantly drink away my fucking problems.

I've realised over the past few day's that i'll eventually have to leave and go home even if that's the last thing on my mind right now, I need to get back to reality and unfortunately reality includes not seeing Harry everyday, yes i'm still upset but over the past week it's like i've reverted to myself two-three years ago when I was around him practically every single day and it just became a habit of seeing him.

Harry is that habit that I'll never be able to break, no matter how hard to get over him, I can't, I'll never be sober when it comes to him. A poisonous drug that's slowly killing me, yet I've become so used to the taste that I crave more, just like the former addict inside me i'll always crave more.

Even in my almost comatose sleep I couldn't escape all of the worries clouding my mind, it was fine for the most part, it was like any other dream until I walked into my own apartment and saw Harry there, with someone that wasn't me and I woke up with a weird feeling in my stomach, clearly it was jealousy but for what? It was just a dream and even it wasn't he's made it pretty clear we aren't going to happen and I just have to find a way to be ok with that.