Beat Them Back (A Harry Potter Fan Fiction)

Dementors on Arrival

I have always hated introductions. Truly, with a deep passion, I hate introducing myself. Why would someone hate something as menial and typical as an introduction? Well, thank you for asking. That's because I TRY to introduce myself, and I only manage to say "Hi, I'm Colby McCormack" before some git-faced prat interrupts me with something like, "Oh are you related to [insert name of famous relative here]", before they blather on about music or Quidditch. It gets old real quick, let me tell you, and its only happened to me about a million times since I've been on this earth.

So, this time, I am going to introduce myself properly. So if you know what's good for your health, you'll sit down, hush up, and listen to what I have to say. Ya?

Hi, I am Colby McCormack. Now, I know you probably already have a million questions, so lets save some time and answer them right off the bat, eh?

1) Yes, I do have a boy's name. That's okay. I rather like my name, and I will not respond to any nickname of any sort. No Colbs. No Bibi. Nothing like that. It's not hard, only 5 letters. COLBY.

2) Yes, it is the same McCormack you are thinking of. Daughter to Catriona McCormack, and younger sister to Meaghan McCormack, both of the Pride of Portree Quidditch Team. Also, younger sister to Kirley Duke, lead guitarist of the Weird Sisters. Obviously I am the lesser of the famous people in my family, which is pretty much everyone. So yeah, I guess I'm a bit of a disappointment.

3) I will also not respond to Ms. McCormack, little McCormack, the other McCormack, Kirley's little sister, Mini Meaghan, Catriona's daughter, or the little Tornado.

3b) No, I will not be explaining that last one.

4) You may not have any of their autographs.

5) I will not give you Kirley's number, so don't even ask.

Now that that's out of the way, back to more information about me! I'm a Seventh Year Hufflepuff, the lamest of Hogwarts Houses. What I did to end up here, I'll never know, but I've been repping the badger on the Quidditch pitch for the last 6 years, so whats one more to go? I've been playing Quidditch since before I could walk. I plan to play until the day I die and even then, you'll have to pry my bat from my cold, dead, fingers. Because, that's right folks, unlike my chaser mother, and keeper sister, I am a beater. I know, its unusual for someone of my stature, or gender (unfortunately) to become a professional beater, unless you plan on playing for the Harpies, but no, thats not my plan either.

Puddlemere United is my favourite team. I WILL play for them after I graduate as their first female beater in history, and if I don't, then I'll throw myself in front of the Whomping Willow. But until that time comes, I will settle for trying to juggle my NEWTs classes, training my team within an inch of their lives, and terrifying anyone who gets in my way.

FINALLY! I get to finish an introduction...

Not as exciting or satisfying as I thought it would be. Whatever, now that we have the exposition out of the way, I have more important things to do.

The scarlet steam engine of platform 9 ¾ puffed out a cloud and let a final whistle echo through the station. "Everybody, on the train! I'm Head-Boy!" Percy [the prat] forcefully ushered a gaggle of third years onto the train.

"Great" I mumbled to Tilley Abbot, my best friend since first year. "Do you think he knows the difference between Head-Boy and dictator?"

"Probably. But since there aren't any Professors on the train, he is technically in charge of you" she reminded me as we dragged our trunks behind us through the crowd.

"I swear to Merlin, if he reminds me one more time that my socks aren't uniform then I think I might acquaint him with the end of my broomstick" I muttered darkly.