War with myself

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I am in war with myself
I cant let it go
Should i be this or should do that?
Being the proper girl never crossing a line
Still i cry, hurt and never satisfy.
Slowly painting myself black with the tears that i have cried though out the years
Never thought will end up here,
dreamed of an escape not found it yet

I had dreams but never to be just one thing
I live this life to survive another day never living it.
Everyday i break down and i pick up the pieces left of me.

Wanting to give up every second
Be from this monotonous melancholy life
But hanging on the last rope
Watching all these feelings eating me up.
So much emotion to get hurt.
When will i find my escape?

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