It Takes everything for me to say three little words to you

Two(love and lust)

"Come on Lisa you should talk to Jimmy" Veronica said This must have been the main topic since Lena showed up. And it sickened me to death. I hated him with such passion it was unbearable. I never wanted this to happen but it did

"No. You know I don't want to and that I can't stand him" I said as I turned to veronica. She sighed and looked at me like I was crazy. I knew what she was thinking. How can someone hate their ex husband?

It was easy. So easy I didn't know how bad I would hate Jimmy. I am talking about the drummer of Avenged sevenfold. we where married for three years until he brought Leana home one day. I hated him since the day the rings came off my finger.

I picked up October and headed off to the bunks.

"lis, I want uncle Brian" She said.I smiled and set her down.

"Uncle Brian's sleeping too" I said with a smile. October yawned and I laid her down to rest. I watched her sleep just as I always did. Every night I did this. They say I am too stick with her, I will only allow her to be with people She has seen before. But how can I not be like this? This is my one and only godchild. The only thing left that I have of Paul gray.

My story goes way back with slipknot. I met them when I returned from England. Getting over a drug addiction and the death of Sid vicious. My life was crazy then I soon moved to Huntington Beach California. There, I attended Huntington beach High school I didn't meet the men of Avenged sevenfold until 2001. On a tour. I guess things went from there. I got married in 2004 to the none other then Jimmy Sullivan. Also known as the rev.

And there's where my story just about ends. I got divorced two years ago. And I hated him ever since. Actually since he brought Leana home. I never thought he would cheat on me, But I guess he did And I couldn't be more angry. Let's say I strongly dislike him.

But October has other plans for me. She loves Jimmy, Maybe because he is so playful with herMaybe because he is fun. But he can not be near her, He brings girls around all the time. And it's not them envoirment I want her in. Nor would her mother. The night began to unwind as Jimmy walked past me.

"Uncle Jimmy" Sang October from inside the bunk. Fuck, I thought she was almost asleep. I gave him a look as he poked his head in and smiled at the baby. He held her hand and said goodnight.

"Uncle Jimmy going sleep too Lis" She asked me. I nodded, For a year and a half year old she is very smart. Jimmy walked back with something. He looked at me as he went by. He always gave me the same look. Like he knew I hated him or something. But can you blame me? I can't. October fell asleep and I got up to be with everyone else. I grabbed a beer and sat next to Brian.

Jimmy had his tramp of the week wrapped around him again. It made me sick. And everyone else could tell, Espically veronica. Who knew me the best. I swallowed most of my drink and glared at Jimmy longer, I shook my head at the thought of how he left me for people like her. I wondered what he saw in her. What did he see in me? It didn't make any sense. Jimmy was nothing to me and I was nothing to him. And that was the way it was going to stay.

Jimmy stared at me, I looked away. He did the same and went back paying attention to her. I didn't even know her name and I did not want to.

(Jimmy's P.O.V)

I watched Lisa as she made her way from the couch grabbing a beer. Still fucking beautiful. I watched Zack as he looked at her. Hailey looked at Veronica and the glare stopped at me. At least I got her to look at me. I knew she hated me. But for what? The divorce? or the girls? Probably both. But I still loved her. More then anything. And she knew that. She loved me back. She would keep it hidden under every glare and giggle.

She would never let me near the baby again. Not alone anyway. It didn't matter how hard I tried to win her trust. She was so stick with her, it was unbelievable. But she did it well. October never got hurt on her watch, And I was confident she never will be.

Lisa smiled at Zack. He smiled back. There had to be something going on between the two. I had to know what it was, Where they dating? Maybe. Gena broke up with him three months ago. And she hasn't seen anyone since we got divorced. I glared at Zack, who caught me looking at him. He lowered his head and drank more of his beer. That will teach him not to look at her. I thought with a smirk.

Demi had her legs wrapped around me. I think I was about to be sick. I had to be so drunk when I picked her up. I don't know what came over me. She whispered in my ear, she wanted to find a quite place, Fucking her was the last thing on my mind right now. My only thoughts where Lisa 

She was gone. When I picked my head up I heard her voice as she was calming The baby down. Zack got up to see what was wrong. He looked at me then continued walking, No one else seemed to be paying any attention but me, Zack and Lisa

She came back with October. She called for me.Lisa shook her head no, October burrired her face in Lisa's neck She sat down and rocked her back to sleep. My memories when back to when we where together. And I held her until she went to sleep. My eyes began to close as I thought of that. A smile came across my lips. Lisa got up and and went off someplace. All I could think about wasLisa. How perfect she was. And how much of an idiot I was when I lost her.