Pick Your Poison (HIATUS)

chapter ten-

chapter ten-

tw: postpartum depression, violence, blood

Jae Hee

Of all my memories from childhood, the day of Junko's birth stuck to me the most. I don't dare forget this day, because it was the happiest day of our lives.

And the most painful, because it was the day we found out that our mom had cancer. Because of this, my mother developed postpartum depression. I wasn't allowed to see my mom for weeks, because the mere sight of either me or my sister would send her spiraling out of control. It was a difficult time for all of us, especially our dad. We watched our mom slowly descend into madness, as our dad desperately tried to pick up her broken pieces.

I recall him hiding us in the bathtub during one of the worst manic episodes my mom ever had. He placed Junko in my arms and told us to be quiet. My dad was usually calm and collected, but that day he looked a mess; he looked scared. I could hear my mom screaming outside, followed by a blast of glass breaking and things being thrown around. He gave us each a kiss before turning around, locking us in. I don't know how long we spent there; I even fell asleep at one point. I was awakened by a gentle nudge on my shoulder. I thought our dad finally came back, but it was our neighbor, Ms. Sakuraba. She led us out of the bathroom and out of our house, which looked like it's been hit by a tornado. Plates were shattered on the floor, family pictures are strewn across the living room, and most traumatizing of all: there was a bloody kitchen knife right outside the bathroom door.

The police questioned me immediately after. I was seated on our neighbor's kitchen table, my short legs dangling from the seat. There was a blanket wrapped around my shoulders and a steaming cup of hot chocolate on the table in front of me. A policewoman sat adjacent to me, scribbling in her little notebook.

"When can I see my mom and dad?" I asked, "Where did they go?"

She and Ms. Sakuraba shared a look, quite unsure what to tell me. I was bracing myself for bad news, but the policewoman smiles kindly. "Your mom is very ill, Jae Hee. But you'll see them very soon. Your dad takes care of your mom very well." She nods encouragingly.

We didn't see our parents for a whole week after that. After the incident, I learned that my dad was severely cut on his arm. My mom, on the other hand, was safe. She was already on medication by the time we were granted a visit and was no longer in hysterics just by looking at us. It was decided that she'd stay in the hospital to receive treatment for both her cancer and depression and since then, it's all we've ever known.

Sometimes, I see her in my dreams: the version of my mom...who wasn't quite my mom. I see her running around the house maniacally, smashing plates, turning tables over, screaming our names. The memory is so vivid; I can almost hear her. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if my dad hadn't been there. I picture the bloody knife, stained with his blood. Would it be mine? Would it be my sister's?

I wake up in cold sweat. My mouth feels dry as a desert, and my head is pounding. I lift my head slowly, surveying my surroundings, my eyes adjusting amidst the darkness. I don't recognize my room at all.

Then it all comes crashing down on me, the incidents that led to my current situation. Babel, Chairman Jang RDU-90, Coisanic, Dr. Hyun Woo, my sister is in danger... It's all too much for me to bear. I pull myself towards the side of the bed and hurl into a trash can. I still feel a little disoriented and dizzy, but I try to pull myself together. It takes maximum effort to just swing my feet off the side of the bed. I take a deep breath, praying my knees won't give out.

"Jae Hee?" a voice speaks out from the corner. I recognize the voice immediately. A mix of emotions go through me at once; a range between confusion and relief. My heart swells with the latter, but my mind tells me to be rational for once.

"Chairman Jang?" I answer, my voice raspy. I feel like I'm about to faint again, but I fight the weariness in my eyes. "Get me out of here, or I'll call the police."

I hear him sigh. I feel the bed dip as he takes a seat beside me. He reaches over and switches on a lamp. I blink a couple of times, finally recognizing him. He didn't look like the Chairman Jang I knew. His hair is down, bangs nearly covering his eyes, and he wore a knitted cardigan over his pajamas. He deviated 180 degrees from his usual crisp suit and tie and his neat slicked-back hair. He even wore glasses.

"There's food on your bedside table and a pain reliever. You should eat."

"What am I doing here? What do you want from me?"

"You're not in danger, Jae Hee. No one is. Please stop worrying." He says calmly. I take a deep breath and exhale, still unsure of what to make of this situation.

He reaches over me again, this time for the tray of food that sat by the lamp. He sets it on the bed. I stare at him, dumbfounded. Who is this man and what did he do to Chairman Jang Han Seo?

"Hey." He snaps his fingers in front of my face. "You need eat this."

He takes a spoonful of rice and extends his arm towards me. I only realize now that he's trying to feed me. "You don't have to," I say, taking the bowl from him. "But thank you."

He nods, a little bit disappointed. "Call me if you need anything then."

I feel a pang of guilt. I may have come across as grumpy. Besides, how could I get out of here without his help? "Wait." I find myself calling after him. "Would you mind staying with me for a bit?"

He smiles and retakes his spot on the bed. I appreciate that he kept a respectable distance. I admit it feels a little awkward with both of us trying to find the words to say.

"Why did you bring me here, Chairman Jang?" I ask.

"You're in danger."

"I know." Now it's his turn to look at me in surprise. "I knew from the moment I disobeyed my supervisor. I knew it was only a matter of time until I was found out, and I was planning to go into hiding myself. My question is, why did you decide to help me?"

"This might sound crazy," he starts, but I cut him off.

"I can handle crazy."

He takes a breath and clenches his fists. He looks at me, his expression is unreadable. "I like you, Dr. Jae Hee."

author's note

Ooh someone just confessed 👀😍 

Hi everyone! Sorry for the late update 😥 Shoutout to 𝕓𝕚𝕕𝕪𝕒𝕕𝕒𝕨𝟚𝟘 for writing on my message board ❣ I'll definitely try to update more often. Please don't forget to vote and comment 🥰

Anyway, I'm planning to write one-shots based on the characters Kwak Dong Yeon played. If ever I push through, comment your favorite KDY drama (other than Vincenzo) so I can start! 

PS- Would you guys be okay with some 18+ one-shots?