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♥︎
Wanda was uncertain on how to word the subject she had planned to speak on, she felt sheepish on it, like it was a forbidden secret.
She could just, bring it up, but how would that go? 'So Nat, I need you to know that apparently I'm in love with another person but I don't know who it is!'
No, that wouldn't sound right.
Wanda decided, she'd just go along with it whenever the topic came up.
She opened her phone, it read 'Thursday, January 24th, 2:39 pm'. Wanda groaned in exasperation, she woke up too late. She needed to get ready, not feeling like showering when she had only just awakened, nor did she even have the time to.
Wanda walked over to the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. Her hair was an absolute mess, and her eyes and pale face looked as if she had been sleeping for 70 years.
She concentrated her palm, allowing the bright red energy to flow out, and raked her hands in her auburn hair, smoothening and perfecting it out with ease.
Wanda then rubbed around her face, all the unappealing morning haze disappearing, the liveliness returning on her face.
Once Wanda finished, she smiled at herself in the mirror for a second, then walking out the bathroom and put on clothes that would count as outerwear.
Wanda had finally finished buttoning up the flannel button down shirt she had that was way too big to even fit her, and stumbled out to the door, putting on her left shoe as she controlled the doorknob from afar.
Completely unexpectedly, it seemed that she wasn't late at all, because Natalia had her hand placed up in a fist, as if she was about to knock.
Wanda placed her foot down slowly as she stared flimsily at Natalia, her red force still controlling the open door, sheepishly apologizing, "Sorry.."
"It's alright," Natalia responded, putting her hand down, folding her hands a top of her stomach.
"So," Wanda awkwardly began, "What are you doing here? Did you, forget something?" Wanda guessed.
Natalia laughed, "No, silly," She teased, smiling, "I decided we can talk here instead, my office was being used by another psychiatrist, without my consent, I might add," Natalia scowled at the last part, "So, I came here, that's okay, right?"
Wanda nodded quickly, "Yes! Of course it's okay," She smiled.
"Great," Natalia commented, there was an awkward pause, "So, can I- come in?" She asked, still lingering at the doorstep.
"Oh, right, yeah," Wanda remarked, moving her hand farther to the right to open it wider, letting Natalia enter.
Natalia thanked her as she opened the door to Wanda's bedroom, sitting herself down on the ground as Wanda sat on her bed.
Wanda furrowed her eyebrows slightly as Natalia looked up at her as if nothing had happened, "Nat, you can- sit up here, if you'd like," Wanda says, tapping down on the spot next to her.
"No thank you," Natalia declined, "I like the floor, it's comfortable," Natalia says.
"Alright," Wanda finished.
"So," Natalia began, crossing her legs in a cris-cross style, "How do you feel?"
They always began their sessions like this ever since Natalia randomly started it at the beginning of last month. Natalia would ask the mood Wanda's emotions were in, and Wanda would answer truthfully.
"I feel, confused," Wanda owned, tying the material of the oversized flannel she had on.
"What's the reasoning?" Natalia questioned.
Wanda knew this was the moment she had been dreading and thinking of since yesterday. She prayed it would work well.
"What did you realize?" Natalia asked, ripping a piece of paper from Wanda's notebook, grabbing a pen.
"That.. my heart is nearly past Vision, but, it's reserved, for another soul," Wanda sighed, aware of Natalia's amused and surprised look.
Natalia didn't answer for a second, writing down on the paper before asking, "Do you happen to know who it's reserved for?" Natalia smirked.
"Not yet, at least," Wanda's expression was abashed, this was such an odd topic.
"No need to be embarrassed," Natalia reassured, being more somber now.
Wanda mentally thanked her, then continued, "I feel like, it's a trick. I don't believe that I'm actually done with him, but in my mind, I can't fathom a romantic feel with him anymore.." Wanda trailed off, seemingly forgetting that Natalia was in the room, "Now that he's gone, It is like there is nothing left to hold onto,,"
Natalia wrote Wanda's exact words down on the paper, and commented, "See? Now you're being real, we're getting somewhere now,"
"Where are we going?" Wanda sarcastically asked, smiling.
Natalia rolled her eyes playfully, then softly spoke, "Wanda, from what I'm seeing so far, I'd say, it's not actually Vision himself you miss, it's the feeling he gave you," Natalia shared, "Of course, you still miss him, just not in that way, and that's okay. In fact, that's more than okay. It's wonderful, you're moving on. To whom? I don't know, but whoever it is, they're bound to keep you grounded." Natalia smiled, pridefully gleaming up at Wanda's lightly smiling face.
Then, suddenly, something inside Wanda's mind clicked. Natalia was correct, she was moving her adoration to another being, but the being was unknown, until now.
Wanda knew Natalia was her most trusted companion, and she held all her mental sobriety on Natalia's efforts of being there for her. Wanda didn't even do that for Vision. In addition, Wanda felt the most content when in the company of Natalia, and she was proud that she was able to let out all her thoughts to Natalia without hesitation, it felt right.
Her mind was racing, and her eyes flew around the room, as if it was following the movements of a zapping fly. She deemed, this was the worst possible outcome of this situation. Wanda felt like she was adding another misfortune to her life.
"Hello?" She heard suddenly.
Wanda looked down at Natalia, and she seemed to be just finished with writing down more annotations.
"Sorry, I spaced out for a second," Wanda made up, avoiding eye contact.
"It's alright, what else did you realize?" Natalia asked, twirling her pen.
"I don't think I had anything else," Wanda lied.
Natalia nodded, and began to re read her notes as Wanda thought of things to say. She wanted to just share with her what she had been thinking, yet it was too risky.
"Hey, Nat?" Wanda looked down at her once again.
"Hm?" Natalia showed attention, looking back up.
"Thanks for being my therapist," Wanda genuinely thanked, smiling at her.
Natalia wasn't expecting the praise, but she grinned back, making Wanda fight back a larger smile as she replied, "You're welcome."
-gismiley
hey everyone, so on thursday morning i will be on my way to dominican republic, and i'm not sure if the cellular service is efficient there. so, i might be MIA for at least 6 days, but in the meantime i will be writing the following chapters and i will publish them as soon as i can; thank you for the support my loves, till then xx
