𝐖𝐀𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 ↦ Kaz Brekker

xxxiii. arguments and confessions

"Don't pull that card, Yahontov," Kaz growled, pointing a finger at her. "All of us are wanted criminals and I'm trying to get us the money that they owe us. I'm trying to get you out of trouble! Can you not see that?"

"By using my trauma?"

"If that's the way, then yes! I will use your trauma to make sure that we can still live in the city that we grew up in. That we can be safe in the city that we grew up in!" Kaz cried. "Can you not see that I'm trying to get the best possible outcome here or are your feelings clouding your judgement? You're thinking like Stasiaj, not as Snake."

"I'm thinking like a human being, Bastard," Stasiaj glared, and Kaz felt something wither inside of him at the term. "Screw you."

"Stasiaj..." She brushed past him, grabbing her coat in the process. "Stasiaj, stop it. Now!"

"No!" The girl turned around, storming towards him, her eyes wild with anger. "I have never, never, used Jordie against you or as a bargaining chip, Kaz and I trusted you. I trusted you with that information about me! It was mine to reveal in my own time. If I had wanted to speak to them about it, don't you think I would have said so? But I didn't, so you shouldn't have said yes on my behalf!"

"Stasiaj, if you would just..."

"No, no more," She hissed, stepping away from him. "No more of this, Kaz. I can't do this with you if you're going to abuse my trust. I'll talk to him, but I don't want to see you again. Don't come to my house. Don't ask for information. Don't you ever talk to me again."

"Stasiaj, stop this," He growled, following after her. "You can't do this."

"Watch me. Keep your Crows away from my house, I no longer want to associate with you or anyone who'd be willing to send information back to you," She spat. Her eyes were no longer the warm blue that Kaz was used to, instead hard slats of ice as her entire posture changed into that of Snake. "Malkus, come on. We're leaving."

"Ma?" Malkus stood in the doorway, looking in between Kaz and Stasiaj with wide eyes.

"We're going," Stasiaj replied, before turning for the door. Kaz felt his heart sink and he reached out, grabbing onto her coat sleeve and stopping her.

"Please, don't do this, Stasiaj,"

"It's Snake," She glared.

"Stasiaj, stop this. I had no other choice, how else was I supposed to get this deal to work? We needed this deal to keep everyone here and safe. To keep your vipers safe as well," He stumbled over his words, trying to get them out. "He's your brother, you were going to have to talk to him at one point anyway."

"So you monopolized on my trauma? That makes it all better then," She put her fangs away, spinning to glare at him. "Real classy, Kaz!"

"I didn't have a choice. The deal had to go through so we could all get our money!" 

"Saints, I can't believe that I fell for you!" Stasiaj cried, as Kaz dropped her hand. "I should have known how this was going to end. I'm such a fool for ever believing that you could have loved me back enough not to pull a stunt like this. I'm so stupid."

She wiped tears from her eyes, glaring at him.

"You love me?"

"Loved, past tense," Stasiaj snapped. "But your black heart wouldn't know that emotion even if it came up to slap you in the face. Come on, Malkus, we're going!"

She turned, storming out of the room as Kaz struggled to get his feelings and words back in order. She loved him? Stasiaj loved him? He didn't know what to do, he just wanted to run after her, to kiss her and tell her that he loved her back. That he had always, deep down in his heart, loved her back ever since he first saw her.

But it was too late. It was too late for him to run after her and tell her that he loved her with every inch of himself. How he loved it when she teased him and he loved it when she smiled and when she laughed and when she cooked or sang or giggled. Saints, he even loved her when she was yelling at him in anger but how he could tell her? How could he tell her when he screwed everything up so royally?

"Da?" Malkus was lingering in the doorway, looking between them. "What do I do?"

"Go home, Malkus," He replied, dropping Kaz Rietveld and pulling his façade of Dirtyhands back on, ignoring the pain in his heart. "Follow Snake."

"Da?" Malkus' voice trembled and Kaz almost turned back towards him, but he continued down the corridor and away from the boy. "Da, please. Please, don't go. Please, da, please don't do this!"

∘☽༓☾∘

Hiya,

Uh, this wasn't actually going to go this way, but then I got to writing it and this is the outcome. So, Stasiaj and Kaz have technically confessed their feelings for each other, but she no longer wants anything to do with him. Who was in the right with this argument?

Let me know what you think (I am sorry),

Love Li xx