Suicidal Ideation『Depressed Todoroki』

#5 | Falling But Nobody Knows

As soon as they were in front of UA's gates...

"An eating disorder?" Endeavor hissed, "how can you be so weak? You embarrass me. We will spend this next week training."

Shouto nodded obediently. Not wasting any time, he sat down in the passenger seat and waited for his nightmare to begin.

『✰❦✰』

Shouto knew it would be bad, but he hadn't expected this.

His father kept forcing him to use his ice. He felt his body numb to the cold, his father didn't stop though. He would keep pushing him until he couldn't bear the cold any longer. Then he would yell for him to use his fire. Shouto would only use his fire in battles when necessary, or when training in UA. He refused otherwise. His father was becoming more impatient the longer he denied his fire.

"USE YOUR FIRE SHOUTO! YOUR ICE WILL GET YOU NOWHERE AS A HERO!" He kicked shouto, sending him flying into the wall.

"I won't-" He started, spitting out blood, "I won't use my left side."

This only seemed to enrage his father more. Shouto subconsciously raised his arms to protect his face when he saw Endeavor's arm raised to strike for a hit. His father had repeatedly kept punching at Shouto's arms, causing them to go numb. His right arm, still being injured from last training, felt like it was about to disintegrate. He dropped his arms, which caused his father to punch him straight in the face, sending him back against the force. He slid down the wall, his side facing upwards while the other one lay against the ground. Shouto was a millisecond away from passing out before his father had finally decided to end his training for the day.

Then, Shouto's vision went black.

...

"Sho? Are you awake?"

"Y-Yumi?" His voice sounded hoarse.

"Thank god you're ok! I bandaged up most of your wounds, you just need rest."

"T-Thank you, Y-Yumi."

Even as blurred as Shouto's vision was, he could see his sister's tear-tracked face.

"I'm sorry Sho! I'm sorry I can't do more. I-" She began to sob into Shouto's shirt.

"I-It's not your f-fault. P-plus, I'm fine."

The words sounded bitter in Shouto's mouth. Was he really fine? He had just hoped his sister had bought it, which she didn't seem to, but she left it at that.

"Ok. I'll be in my room if you need me, ok?" Fuyumi asked, looking at Shouto one last time before filing out of the room.

Shouto was grateful he was alone, at least he thought he was.

'Did you forget about me already?'

Shouto grimaced.

'Really, you passed out? You're pathetic, how can you become a hero if you pass out from something so simple?'

'You're weak, you don't deserve to be a hero.'

"Shut up." His voice was barely above a whisper.

'Why should I? You're weak, useless, pathetic. What will it take to convince you that you're not needed.'

"Sh-ut up." His voice cracked as tears crawled out of his eyes.

'What's wrong? Did I hurt your feelings?' The voice said mockingly.

Shouto brought his hands up to his ears and gripped tightly, trying to shut out the voice.