little do you know // niall horan au

chapter 22; give me love

Niall's hand was cold.

It was a bit odd, considering he was always so warm. He was her sunshine boy. His entire being was made up of this all-encompassing warmth that always seeped into her skin and made her feel warm too.

But his fingers were cold now, as she held one of his hands in both of hers. He was fast asleep when she walked into his room, lips parted slightly as he snoozed the afternoon away. She knew he was probably feeling drowsy from whatever it was that they were currently pumping into his arm so she let him be, instead settling for holding his hand and trailing her fingers through his hair. His scruff was growing out a bit since he probably hadn't had the opportunity to shave. She made a mental note to bring him his shaving kit the next time she came.

Zayn and Harry were sitting in the waiting room, allowing Liam and Harlow to head back home to freshen up and take a nap. Mona was grateful that they left her alone with Niall. She didn't want to seem like a creep for staring at him while he slept. She couldn't help it, though; she missed him. She couldn't help but take in the little bruise on his forehead or the cast on his leg and not feel a sharp ache in her chest.

She didn't realize that she had fallen asleep until she felt someone's fingers brushing a strand of her hair out of her face and flinched slightly. When she opened her eyes, Niall was watching her, a small smile on his beautiful face. "Hi," he murmured, voice groggy. He looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes open. "I wondered who was squeezing my hand so tightly."

It was only then that Mona realized her position. She was still sitting on the chair next to his bed, but she ended up leaning against her forearm which rested on the guardrail of his bed, her other hand still holding one of his. She loosened her grip, sitting up only to realize that the angle with which she fell asleep was not good for her neck, which felt stiff as she straightened up now. "Sorry," she muttered, rubbing her neck. "Was that what woke you? You should get some more rest."

She attempted to shift away, but Niall held on to her hand firmly, his other hand coming up to trail lightly over her cheekbones and down her jawline, up her nose bridge and across her eyebrow. "You haven't been sleeping," he said softly, bright blue eyes following the movements of his finger. Mona found herself holding her breath, warmth blooming to the tops of her skin, and she hoped she wasn't blushing as hard as she felt like she was. "And you've been crying."

Mona huffed out what she hoped sounded like a laugh as his eyes met hers. She couldn't help the way she felt like she was melting in his gaze, completely enamored by her sunshine boy, even when he was watching her so sadly. "Nothing new there," she tried to joke, but it only caused Niall to frown, and she found herself tapping the corners of his lips so they'd curl back upwards again, the gesture so achingly familiar that she almost started to cry again.

"Am I dreaming?" His voice sounded heavy and muffled, like he was starting to fall asleep again, but she could tell that he was trying very hard to keep his eyes open. "I'm not dreaming this time, right?"

She didn't know what he meant by that, but she reached out to flick his nose, chuckling softly at his soft grunt. "No," she murmured into his hand, her lips brushing over his knuckles. Those were bruised too. "You're not dreaming."

He sighed in what sounded like relief, his eyes fluttering shut for a few moments. She started to wonder whether he had fallen asleep again when he opened them to look at her, a sort of desperation in the baby blue. He looked a bit like he was in pain, which made her lean closer to him, eager to give him whatever he needed, to protect him. "I'm sorry, Mo," he whispered, voice cracking a bit, and he held onto her hand as if he were afraid that she would run away. "I'm—" he took a deep breath, "when you said that you were done I was so afraid that you meant it. And then you weren't here with the others—I thought—"