Why Try? (A Jake Foushee FanFic)

Chapter Six: Insecurity

Erin's POV:

I showered quickly and put on a bright red one piece bathing suit. My eyes traveled up my body, noticing all of the things that made me feel insecure. My thighs, stomach, arms, then my face. I sighed thinking of how he used to make me feel so awful about myself, which was something that stuck with me even now. I shook the thoughts out of my head and straightened my hair followed by putting on some waterproof makeup. I threw on some jean shorts and a black tank top over my body. When I walked out all of the boys were already changed and waiting to get to the beach in the front of the bus. Most of them already had their shirts off, even Andrew who normally wasn't one to follow the crowd. But Jake, he sat on his phone with swim trunks and his shirt still on. I smiled at his bashfulness, I kinda found it refreshing. I sat down next to him, but he didn't say anything or even acknowledge me for that matter. I bit my lip and just looked around at all of the guys. Did I do something wrong? I thought after our talk last night we would be closer than ever now?

Once we put our stuff down on the sand, all the guys started to head down to the water. I bit my lip nervously, I crossed my arms and lifted my tank top over my body then slipped my shorts off. I took a deep breath and ran a hand through my hair before I started walking over to where they were goofing around in the water. I looked back to see Jake sitting down on a towel still looking down at his phone. I walked over to him and smiled, "You coming?" I asked looking down at him. He squinted as he looked up due to the sun, "I-I don't think so" he said and looked back down. I sighed and took a seat next to him, "All right spill it Tillman, what's wrong?" I asked, he glared at me for using his middle name. "I'm just not as like ripped and skinny as the other guys, you know? My brother calls me fat all the time, I try to pretend like it doesn't bother me but it does." he said with a shrug and looked out at the ocean. I stood back up grabbing his hand pulling him up with me. I grabbed the ends of his shirt and pulled it over his head, "What are you?" he asked as I got the collar over his head. I tossed the shirt over on a towel, "You are perfect, don't let anyone ever tell you any different. I'll beat Luke up when we see him at the show in a couple of weeks." I said looking at him and took both of his hands. He chuckled and pulled me into a hug, "Thank you, but I don't think I'm the perfect one here." he whispered and kissed the top of my head. I blushed looking down at my feet, "Come on" he said keeping his left hand in mine as we walked towards the water. 

Jake wrapped his arms around me from behind as we watched the rest of the boys goof around and throw a Nerf football back and forth. Sammy threw it in front of us causing water to splash all over me. All of the guys started to laugh, so with a smirk I picked up the ball and threw a perfect spiral into Sammy's chest causing him to fall back into the water. Everyone laughed louder and Andrew of course caught it on his waterproof camera. Jake chuckled but kept his head on my shoulder, I smiled as I blushed and put my arms over his, that were still wrapped around my torso. "So what are you guys?" Gilinsky asked as he ran a hand through his wet hair. I looked at Jake who was looking at me, we both shrugged and started laughing softly. "Well apparently they slept in the same bed last night" Sammy said with a smirk. "It looks like you two are dating" Nate said chuckling and tossed the football to Johnson. Andrew chuckled, "Erin doesn't exactly date" he said as he adjusted something on his camera. "Andrew.." I said with a glare. "Well it's true, you and Austin were only-" "Don't ever bring him up again!" I said getting out of Jake's arms and got into Andrew's face. I felt everyone's eyes on me and mine began to fill the tears. I had to walk away, I had to get it out of my mind. Every time someone would bring Austin up a bunch of memories would flood into my mind and replay over and over again. 

I got over to where our stuff was and began to put my shorts back on. Tears kept rushing down my face as the memories replayed in my mind. I grabbed my things and walked quickly back to where the bus was parked. I got inside to see Brian and my dancers hanging out, "Are you alright?" Brian asked, but I was so focused on the memories it took me a few moments to respond. "Y-yeah, I just got umm too much sun or something" I said before I sniffled and walked to the back of the bus. I changed into the closest pair of sweatpants I could find but I stayed in my tank top. I got into my bed and sobbed into my pillow. I told Andrew I didn't want to deal with the Austin drama while I was on tour, and now it had ruined the first two days already. I heard someone come into the room, thinking it was Andrew I closed my eyes pretending I was asleep, but that only made the memories worse. "Er" I heard Jake's deep voice say as he sat down next to me on my bed. I sat up wiping my tears as best as I could but more fell from my eyes. "Oh Er" he frowned and pulled me onto his lap. I leaned against him and cried into his chest, "I don't expect you to tell me, if it makes you upset like this you never have to tell me. I just don't want to see you cry" he said and wiped some tears from my cheeks. "I want to tell you, but I'm just not ready yet" I said sitting up and looking at him. He nodded and kissed my forehead gently. I couldn't help but close my eyes and smile at that. "Let's just stay here and watch a movie, okay?" he asked and I just nodded in response. He smiled and got up walking over to the TV to put a movie in. "What are we watching?" I asked as I climbed under the covers. "It's a surprise" he smiled as he walked back over and got under with me. I heard the sound of clocks ticking and I already knew what it was, "Back to the Future?" I asked smiling. "Yeah, you said it was your favorite last night" he said as he put his arm around me. "I know, you remembered though" I said smiling even wider. I then realized that I had totally forgotten about Austin, normally it took me a while to feel better. That's when I realized something else. Jake made the memories go away. Something no one else ever had or could do before. 

We eventually fell asleep cuddled into each other, we fit so perfectly together. Even after I had woken up I didn't dare move, I was way to comfortable and secure being in his arms. He turned to face me smiling, "Hi" he said in a husky voice. "Hi" I giggled but kept my voice at a whisper. "Are you feeling better now?" he asked and tucked some of my now wavy hair behind my ear. "Yeah, Back to the Future always helps and you're not too bad either" I said smiling and giggled. He kissed my forehead and wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me close to him. Our foreheads touched and we kept our eyes locked on each other's. "What are you thinking about?" he asked keeping his focus on me. "You" I said blushing, he chuckled and kissed my cheek softly. "Good cause I was thinking about me too" he said and I hit his chest lightly. "Very funny" I said bringing our faces even closer so that our noses touched. I had butterflies in my stomach moving a mile a minute. Jake moved slowly so that our lips were only inches apart. "Er! Jake! We're getting food do you gu-oh sorry" Johnson said as he walked back to where we were. Jake sighed and I looked up at Jack, "Yeah, we'll be right there" I said sitting up and Jack walked back to the front. Jake grabbed my hand and pulled me back down, "Jake wha-" I was cut off with his lips barely touching mine "Shh" he whispered softly before pressing his lips softly against mine. It was probably the most loving and meaningful kiss I had ever had, kissing Jake was so much different then how I had kissed Austin. I put my hand on the side of his neck as our lips slowly and gently moved in sync with each other. He pulled away slowly and our eyes fluttered back open, "Alright, let's go eat" he chuckled and sat up.

Author's Note:

So his name is Austin! What do you guys think happened with him and Erin? Leave it in the comments! I hope you guys liked this one!