If I Knew Then

Home Is Where The Heart Is

By Absent Heart ON Fanfiction.net 

Now a few different people asked about Flashback's to the affair, so it seems easier to say here, there will be some in future chapters, I just didn't want to weigh down the start of the story with them.

So please ignore any glaring mistakes, and Read, Enjoy, and PLEASE REVIEW!

Home Is Where The Heart Is

Part Two

There was no need for Meredith to look at her sister, to know Lexie was staring at them both with a look of confusion, and was waiting for some kind of explanation for Derek's unexpected arrival. One of them needed to say something, anything to break the silence that had fallen, however all Meredith felt capable of was to keep staring up at the man stood in front of her.

The smile on Derek's face told her he was content to do the same, it was the smile he seemed to save solely for her, and all she wanted was just for a minute longer to stay here, right now with Derek. To forget Lexie, to forget everything, and just have this, because Meredith knew the instant this moment ended, it would be back to reality. A reality where their past was as complicated as the future that lay ahead of them, now he was here in Seattle.

There was so much to do before they could have the start she wanted for them. Just as much as Derek had said he did, Meredith wanted everything out in the open, no sneaking around, no more lies, or having to hide how she felt. To reach that point though, Meredith knew would mean hurting someone who had done nothing to deserve the way he had been treated. Right from the start Josh had been a support, a source of comfort, whilst unbeknownst to him she had been trying, and failing to get over another man. This would break his heart, she was going to break his heart she knew that, and hated herself for it.

Now more than ever Meredith wished she had stuck to her first instinct when Josh had first asked for more commitment from her, and ended it then, because he deserved better than any of this. He deserved someone who could love him, and Meredith knew she never could, despite how much she had tried too.

That was the crucial difference between the two men, she loved Derek, she always had, it wasn't a choice, or something she had to work at, it was just there, and if the past two years had proved anything it was that she probably always would.

"Mer, I can't believe you never said anything! Does this mean there is a big Neuro case coming in? It must be something, if they have flown you out, will you need an Intern?"

Meredith tore her eyes from Derek, and tried to remember at least one of the explanations for why she hadn't mentioned his arrival that she had spent last night in the on-call room coming up with.

"She couldn't. I swore her to secrecy, Richard wanted it that way."

Derek stepped in seamlessly, and came to her rescue.

"And sorry to disappoint you, but there's no big case. I am wanted for a consult, but that's not why I flew out here, I came to sign my contract."

"You're moving to Seattle?"

"I am,"

Derek nodded, and when Lexie threw another glance at a still silent Meredith, he decided to divert her attention.

"And, if your interested I'm pretty sure Mark will probably end up following me. He never does well..."

"You told him? You told him what we talked about?"