"You know, yesterday morning he was in my bed. He slept over and I thought that maybe it could have been something. I just guess I was being stupid" I continued, Kiara was rubbing my back as I talked.
"I'm sorry I'm such a mess, it should be you and the pogues. I just met him and here I am sobbing to you. That's not right" I rambled.
Kiara shook her head, raising her hand to my cheek as she wiped a tear. "You think he'll be okay," I asked, turning to face the water as I changed the subject.
"yeah, he'll be fine. He's John B" Kiara told me, and after a moment we heard loud footsteps approaching. "ladies!" JJ let out, wrapping his arm around both our shoulders, quiet as he looked at me. "What's wrong?" He asked, his tone completely changing.
"Nothing," I told him, faking a smile on my face. "okay. Well, cmon, it's freezing out here" JJ said, keeping his arm around me as we walked towards the house. I hadn't even noticed my wet clothes, I barely registered that it was raining out.
I had given Kiara some of my clothes to change into, Sam giving the boys something too. My bed wasn't that big so when the four of us shoved ourselves onto the bed it was kind of an awkward fit.
"okay push over" Pope complained, shoving my feet to the side. "hey! This is my bed" I let out, a laugh lacing my words.
"i. don't. Care" JJ snickered before grabbing one of my pillows from under my head. "hey!" I yelled, shooting up to reach for the pillow, instead though I was hit with it.
"oh, you are on," I laughed. Kiara got up and grabbed a pillow too. "What about me?" Pope pouted but was quickly hit in the face by a pillow Kiara had thrown at him.
And for that moment we had forgotten about how stressed we were and even though none would admit, how scared we were for John B. We let everything go. And even though none of us looked up I could feel Sam's eyes on us from the doorway.
By the time we had fallen asleep, we were exhausted. It had been one long day, the party feeling a million miles away now. We laid, sprawled out on my bed until the next morning when Sam woke us up. "breakfast!" He yelled to us, earning a chorus of groans.
"Kiara, your mom is here" Sam called from the front door to the pogue sitting at the kitchen table while she ate her breakfast. Kiara shared a look with me before getting up and going to see her mom.
JJ, Pope and I couldn't hear much of their conversation, even when we were leaning back on our chairs and looking around the corner.
After a few seconds, I heard JJ let out a noise and when I looked back he was crashing on the floor, his chair tipping him backwards. Pope and I couldn't help but burst into laughter at the moment but we were cut off when Kiara came back into the kitchen.
"he's okay" She let out and we all turned to her. "seriously?" I asked, getting up from my spot and when Kiara nodded, JJ and Pope got up too. The four of us raced towards the door, leaving our half-finished food lying on the table. Now completely forgotten.
"so, my mom said he was already released. He's going to meet us at the restaurant" She explained as she drove to the wreck. Hurt was laced onto me. I tried to get my mind off of it, I knew better than to fall for someone. Especially after Bianca, I just didn't expect to be hurt by John B.
When we got to the restaurant each of us peeled out of the van, Kiara making sure to get the keys. I wasn't sure why my heart was beating so fast.
"John B!" Pope let out as we ran in, I walked behind them. When I spotted him I wanted to run to him, I had been so worried but he had chosen Sarah.
"I'm sorry, you're staying where?" Kiara asked after John B told us everything that happened. I was quiet.
"Tanneyhill," He told her, his eyes not meeting mine. "So you're living with Sarah Cameron" Kiara stated, walking away from him to bring JJ, Pope and me something to drink.
JJ was the only one who knew about Bianca and even though I hadn't told him about what happened between John B and me, I was sure he could pick up a bit of it from the tension between us. Out of all of them, JJ was the only one to know just how much this hurt me.
Because of this, he was near me a lot, we had bonded a lot over the past few days. Not like we hadn't before, it was just more now that we had both opened up to each other. We just got each other.
He was standing behind my chair, lightly playing with my hair as Kiara and John B talked. "Look, the only reason I'm living there is because her dad bailed me out. And it's way better than foster care, which, by the way, is where I was about to go if Ward didn't-" John B told the pogues. I rolled my eyes, knowing Sam would have taken the boy in, living with Sarah was not his only option.
I leaned my head back, cutting out their voices as I focused on the roof of the restaurant. My mind was racing, I just felt so angry. Angry at John B, angry at Bianca for leaving me. Angry at my parents for making me the way I was. Angry at myself for getting so attached to the pogues, because this would have been so much more simple if I could just walk away from them, specifically John B. But the problem was, I didn't want to walk away from John B, and that's another thing that made me mad. My feelings.
I felt JJ's hands go to my shoulder, resting them there as he talked to the others.
"Elle?" Pope asked, waving his hand in front of my face. "what?" I asked, looking at the boy. The others shared a look. "What's wrong?" He asked me as they started grabbing their things.
"Nothing" I responded, getting up too, even though I had absolutely no clue where we were going.
"very convincing Elle" JJ scoffed, grabbing the keys off the table and tossing them to John B. "are you even listening to us?" John B asked and I almost laughed. I rolled my eyes before answering. "yes" I told him as I walked towards the door, the pogues following behind.
"What's wrong with her?" I heard John B ask. "Are you serious?" Kiara scoffed, racing to catch up with me. As she did she linked arms with me. I don't think she knew how much it made me want to smile. I was going through a lot and I knew she could pick up on that.
She just didn't know how much.
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