Not Gay

Chapter three,

The sun is out Tae, wake up. The sun is out...

Taehyung snuggled around his bed and lifted his head from his pillow. 

"Mmm it's morning already?"
He smiled and turned his head around as he blushed. 

"I- I thought you l-left" He cleared his throat and came to sitting position, fluffing his hair hurriedly. He looked at Jungkook from the corner of his eye, still laying back in bed, his hands behind his head and staring at him sleepily. "I was too tired to get off bed" Jungkook said in a yawn as he climbed off the bed and headed to the bathroom. 

"Jungkook I told you to wear a T-shirt when you - OH LORD" Taehyung covered his bare chest with his hands, looking around nervously like there was someone stalking him. 

"OH GOD I REMEMBER- I WAS AT A PARTY YESTERDAY! WHO BROUGHT ME HOME? I DIDN'T SEE YOU ANYWHERE LAST NIGHT"

Jungkook stared at him with emotionless eyes. 

"You... You don't remember?"
"What?"
"You're telling me that you don't remember what happened last night?"
"Jungkook what do you mean"-
"YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT YOU CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING THAT HAPPEND LAST NIGHT?"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN LAST NIGHT"-

"I'VE CARRIED YOU OUT OF THAT HOUSE BY MY BARE HANDS,  DROVE YOU HOME, FUCKING CHANGED YOU OUT OF THOSE CLOTHES, PUT YOU TO BED AND YOU CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING?"

Taehyung stared at him, slightly scared because he's never seen Jungkook raise his voice like this, but  he was also amazed at what he seems to have done to him last night; was what he thought true? did Jungkook really...care for him in a way?

"JUNGKOOK I'M SORRY I DIDN'T KNOW YOU"-

"OF COURSE YOU DIDN'T TAE, OF COURSE YOU DIDN'T!"

 Taehyung screamed when Jungkook flung his arms on the table and scattered all his books on the floor.  Taehyung pressed his mouth with his hands; body too frozen to get off the bed as Jungkook began to shake with anger, taking a step back and pointing a finger at Tae with flashing black eyes.

"A-All my l-life....people t-tell m-me that they like me....a-and w-when they g-get what they want"- His eyes were now slightly tearing up and his shaking got more vigorous.

"J-Jungkook"-
"THEY ALL SAY THAT IT WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE" He shouted as he grabbed his bag and banged the bedroom door behind him, storming down the stairs. Taehyung ran after him. His mind was a broken apart puzzle between what was true and what was not. What's happening? why is Jungkook suddenly so emotional?

Jungkook was walking down the early morning street, still dim because the sun hasn't risen, his breathing still hitched and a his heart drowned in angry tears, an incapacitate flame growing in his chest. Flashbacks from his past were shuffling in his skull, all the regretful nights at nightclubs, all the confrontations of "love"  he's been told of and experienced was all pouring down his body like a heavy liquid metal, dragging him towards the ground by each step.
 his face was drawn with utter vexation and he was never going to come here again. 

"JUNGKOOK"

He ignored all the voices around him as he continued to storm down the path, feeling his blood get colder with wrath and regret. 

"Jungkook please listen to me"-

Taehyung grabbed his wrist and pulled him back, holding to his arm so tightly he could feel the elder's fingers  rip through his hoodie and bruise his skin.  "Jungkook..." Taehyung said as younger pursued to look away, trying his best to stop the tears and his jaw tightened. 

"Listen to me"

Jungkook faced him as his raged black eyes met Taehyung teary brown ones. 
"I'm sorry I don't remember anything from last night, but I know you never lie so I believe what you said."

Jungkook pulled his arm off Taehyung's.

"I knew you didn't mean it when you kissed me last night."

He walked away as Taehyung stayed rooted to the ground, watching  Jungkook drive away in his black jaguar and leave him alone on the dead, dark street.  his heart stopped it's beat as he felt his ribs lighten inside him, the undone checked shirt he slipped into when he came outside was blowing in the wind, bringing the cold breeze to his body, engendering him to be even weaker. His fingers met his lips as his eyes widened at the youngers confession.  

I can't even remember....my first kiss

He came home to find the paused atmosphere. everything looked dead to him, the soft leather sofa, the carpet floor, dead. 

He dropped onto his bed, to face his open window, showing the golden horizon twinkling up from the icy mountains. It felt like his tears froze into ice before they fell from his chin, it felt like everything turned cold around him, it felt like summer just turned into winter, and he just wasn't ready for it, he wasn't ready. He was scared.

His ears tingled at the sound of something like a piece of crushed paper. He climbed off his bed as he walked up to the window ceil, there was something stuck next to the stained window, a note.

He pulled the paper off and unfolded it, revealing two lines of small scribbles and a small heart drawn at the end, he read it;

"didn't know you were such a good kisser, and yes, you confessed it right to my face yesterday. Last night was fun, we should hang often. 🖤"

"No..." He groaned as he crushed the paper and broke apart. He lost the one thing that let him sleep at night, the one person that actually cared for him. 

He lost him.