Fights in the Falls

Down To Carnival Town Pt 1

With the dance party at the Mystery Shack being a great financial success, Stan announced the next day that he was going to do another event to "bleed 'em dry." Dipper had managed to ask Wendy if she wanted to hang at the fair, and she actually said yes! And better yet, Dipper had managed to keep himself from jumping for joy in front of her! Maybe he was starting to get the hang of this whole "functional human" thing.

"How do they get them into this shape?" Dipper asked, looking at their question mark shaped corn dogs. "It's unnatural."

"But Dipper," Wendy said, "they're so..."

She held her corn dog next to the "DELICIOUS" sign, putting the question mark shaped food at the end of the word.

"... delicious?" Wendy finished hesitantly.

Dipper chuckled at the joke, and soon Wendy joined him. And he was even managing to carry on a decent conversation! One that didn't involve depressing personal crap! Booyah!

Wendy's laugh ended abruptly when some mustard fell from her corn dog right onto her flanel. "Aw, boo! I'll be right back."

Dipper nodded as Wendy walked off, munching on his corn dog of questionable (ha) quality. He smiled at the retreating red head, for once totally happy.

"Look at you two!" Mabel said as she approached her brother, two sticks of cotton candy in hand. "Getting all romantic at the fair!"

"Shh!" Dipper hissed. "Ix-nay on the omance-ray. I decided not to bring that up today. I'm just going to have a nice day to hang out with a friend, and the LAST thing I need is that friend finding out anything too soon."

"C'mon, Broseph," Mabel said. "You can't keep putting this off. If you don't tell her soon, you're going to miss your chance."

"I will tell her," Dipper said. "Just not today. This is really important to me, Mabel. I know I can't overthink things, but I also can't just blurt it out at the wrong moment. That could ruin my chance of even being friends with Wendy."

Mabel raised her hands in surrender. "Alright, fine. Just remember, I tried to warn you. ... Hey, do you smell a gallon of body spray?"

At first Dipper thought his sister was making some kind of joke, but he quickly caught wind of the smell. He turned and saw none other than Robbie "Black Hoodie In 90o Weather" Valentino. Dipper tried to repress the scowl trying to make its home on his face, but only managed to downgrade it to a simple frown.

"Hey," Robbie said as he approached the twins, "have either of you dorks seen Wendy around?"

"Nope," Dipper responded, annoyed hoping Robbie would take a hike before Wendy got back.

Robbie seemed unconcerned with Dipper's answer and swiped some of Mabel's cotton candy from her.

"Hey!" Mabel exclaimed, eyes burning with fury.

"Yeah, I got some new super tight jeans," Robbie said as he began showing off his tight clothing by flexing his noodle legs. "Thought she might want to-"

It was in that moment Robbie realized he made two grievous errors. The first was taking Mabel's cotton candy. NO ONE  took sweets from Mabel and got away unscathed.

The second was moving his legs in a way that left his groin completely unprotected.

Dipper covered his ears as Robbie let out a  girly scream that could probably be heard for miles. Mabel reeled her foot back so fast Dipper had barely seen it move, and a quick glance around told him no one else had seen the kick.

Robbie fell to the ground, clutching his jewels in his hands and squealing in pain. He tried saying something, but he was evidently beyond words at that point. Beyond standing, too. He crawled off in shame, probably going to look for an ice pack.