King of the Darkest Stars (EXO Kai ff)

Chapter Twenty Eight

"How would you know?" I countered. "You weren't there."

Kai's eyes showed his frustration with the conversation but there was a dark sense of enjoyment hidden in his eyes. He turned his gaze back and forth between the two of us.

"You're both impossible!" HIs voice was deep and dark and completely compelling. "It's a good thing you don't have to do much maths or the kingdom would be screwed!"

"Here's some maths for you." Nari put a boot on the table and leaned forward with a glare and a smile fighting against each other on her face. "What's one angry woman plus another?"

Kai opened his mouth to answer but U-jin covered his mouth.

"A trap," warned U-jin. Kai glared at him but stayed silent. Nari took her boot off the table and sat down. She flashed me an amused smile and I winked at her.

Was enjoying myself invalidating my feelings?

I stood up and Kai grabbed my arm. I looked down at him and saw all his sarcasm gone. His eyes were deepened with concern and I pressed a smile against my lips.

"I just need to use the ladies room." The euphemism was unnecessary and the bathroom here was still slightly better than the one in Lotus's camp. Kai kept eye contact for a moment, then let go of me.

He'd been anxious every time we'd parted.

When I went to take a bath, he'd tried to follow me in. I snapped if he was going to complain about my smell he could wait outside like the dog he was. Even if we weren't right next to each other, his eyes would follow me, keeping track of every move I made. I waited until he drew his eyes back to the table and slipped to the edge of camp. I didn't enter the woods, I just sat on a log near a random tent.

I let my head fall into my arms and took deep breaths. I couldn't take all the smiles and the noise. I just needed a moment alone.

Alone.

I almost laughed at myself.

I had spent the past week and half wishing to be with all these people and now the moment I had them I needed a moment alone. It was ridiculous and made no sense.

But I hadn't really been alone in a long time.

Of course that wasn't true.

There had been moments I was woken up from the cold. I had stared at the empty camp and knew no one was coming. I knew that no one there was going to spare me or show me any form of kindness. The place had felt hollow and it was as if all humanity had turned to dust that soured the breeze.

I had to know if he was here.

I stood up and walked through the camp to the large tent surrounded by guards. I walked up to the door and didn't provide any reason for my presence. The guards moved aside and I hesitated, staring at the cloth separating me and my tormentors. I clenched my fingers into a fist then took a deep breath.

I pushed back the cloth and stepped inside. There were about seventy men who all looked up and sneered at me. They were gagged but even their groans and sounds directed towards me were vulgar. I scanned each row of men, turning and leaning forward to see if he was one of them. If the Coachman was here then his plan had been thwarted right?

He wasn't.

I quickly walked out of the tent and went back to my log at the edge of camp. I paced back and forth and tapped my fingers against my palm. If he wasn't there he would be dead, right? Surely he was dead. I pushed my hair out of my face and sucked in a shaking breath.

He was still out there.

They were out there plotting their next move while we were laughing and eating and allowing ourselves to be vulnerable. He was coming for me. He was coming for Kai. He would take us to my father and we would die.

"Aera?" I jumped at the sound of my name. I looked over to see Kai standing much too stiff and straight. I had worried him and would have to face his concern now.

"I just went the wrong-"

"U-jin said he saw you go into the prisoners' tent." His words cut mine short. My hand was shaking, so I held it behind my back. I couldn't bring myself to meet his eyes. I didn't want to see what was so clearly written across his face.

"I was just checking something." The tightness of my throat made my voice come out more strained than I meant. Kai slowly walked up to me and put a hand on my chin, lifting my face and forcing eye contact. He could see right through me.

"Please don't shut me out." His voice sounded just as strained as mine. He let go of my chin and brushed his hand along my face. I closed my eyes and nodded. I had let someone in and if anyone - it should be him.

So, I told him everything and let him hold the pain with me. Maybe it was selfish, but at least I didn't feel so alone anymore. At least I had someone to share the pain with and share my panic with. He didn't laugh or make fun of me. He just listened.

It made me hate my parents even more, to see the mockery they made of something so beautiful.

I was going to be different.

I was going to be happy.