Black.
Everything is black. What happened ? Where am I ? I woke up ? I try to move, raise my hands to my eyes and start rubbing them.That intense black begins to turn into small points of light,in a few moments I could see that I was back in my cell.What about the injection? Worked ? I'm alive, I made it.I can't feel anything, I try to get out of bed and head for the cell bars but I fall to the floor. I try to get up again but I can't feel my legs, I can't control them.As I was trying to understand why I couldn't control them, I saw a figure approaching the cell.I can't figure out who he is, just that approaching black shadow.
-ah bad, the injection worked, said the shadow.
-Ikirac, i said
-What sister don't you get the joke? he tells me
-Ah, I'm already sorry I didn't die. I say
-Let's go upstairs and see what's with you in the lab.
-I can't
-You've really become weaker and more boring, you're only 16 and you're like grandma
-Then leave me fucking alone
-That's how it goes, it's not for nothing that I trained you.
-It's like I had a choice.
-Go up, he said
-I tell you i can't
-Stop pretending to be stupid and come on up.
He opens the cell door and takes my arm,pulls me up, I try to find my balance but I fall again my legs are too weak.
-What the ?
-I told you I can't, what the hell is going on, it's just your fault.
-You really think I care ?
He picks me up and takes me back like a sack of potatoes and we start walking through the castle. We arrive in a long hallway, at the end being a door, we enter there and everything was white, and in the middle a long white table and many glass cabinets. I sit on it and I see a lot of faces around me, I don't recognize them so I just lying down. These faces started touching my body with different utensils I didn't know. During this time I kept thinking about why I agreed to do this, in fact I could neither agree, not fight not run away, How could I fight a 23-year-old trained man, I didn't have a chance, I keep thinking about what my mother would say, what she would tell me to do. I want to learn to not care, I want to learn to hate him, but I can't, no matter how hard I want to, I can't.
Those people were still whispering things, I didn't realize what they were saying. Ikirac approached me and took me in his arms again. I was walking back to the cell, this time it was holding me differently, as if we were two children playing again. I know that Ikirac is still there. I had reached the cell and he put me to bed.
-And why the hell can't I go? I ask
-It's a side effect, you recover
-How long ?
-Between 3 and 5 hours, anyway what the hell do you have to go for? You're just being punished, you were a bad girl, he said and laughed out of the cell.
We almost had a normal conversation.I hear his footsteps moving away but then I notices the cell door, It's not closed, did he forget it or did he not lock it because he knows I can't go? I don't care if I don't feel my feet, this is my chance to escape.
I try to get up but I fall again, I roll to the door and from there I start crawling. And where do I think I'm going? I can't go anywhere, but it's better than here. However, I do not see any soldiers here , to be a trap? I didn't think of that, but I can't go back now,I stop at a corner to make sure there's no one, weird, very weird, but keep going, I'm starting to crawl faster and faster but, but something grabbed my foot, I was afraid to go back to see who it was, I knew it was a trap.And I have so little left.
-Ah and where the hell did you want to go ? a vaguely familiar voice tells me, as if I've heard it before, I turn my head and see him, the soldier at the stalls in the village, since I got here the first day.He sees me and says:
-Ah miss from the village stalls, I didn't even know that you and Ikirac were related.
He picks me up from the ground and takes me in his arms, I don't give in so easily so I start punching him in the back.In vain he is too strong and I am too weak, I hate that.We're going through my cell, why? We go through all the cells until we reach a basement, oh no, I start hitting him again, whatever not, not again. I'm starting to scream, maybe someone will hear me, but after the second scream my mouth was covered. He opens the cell door and we go down some stairs and then I'm thrown on a bed. What the hell he wants from me. What the hell everyone wants.
-What the hell do you want? I shout as he starts to walk towards me. Take me back, take me back to the cell.
-Well, it's like you're running away from there.
-Take me back.
-Oh but why not finish what I start on the first day ?
-Ah so that's what you want, why didn't you say so, I say in a false sweet voice
He smiles wickedly, I hate men, I tell myself once again
-Well, aren't you coming? I say, taking off my T-shirt, I just stay in bras
He laughed and approached me, put his hand on my abdomen, how disgusting, I put my hand on his face going down to the back. He gets even closer to me and tries to lower his hand even lower, but during this time I walk through his jacket looking for the gun, oh look These soldiers. With a quick motion I pull out the gun and point it at his head
-What happened ? Aren't you playing with me anymore?
-Fucking bitch
-Yeah what I thought,Now get your paws off me before I shoot you in the head
He stood up cursing I try to get up, my legs were still numb but I don't think I'll be able to lift.I try but I fail.
-Ahah, he says when he saw me.
I do my best and get up I was still shaking but I made it, I put the gun to his neck and push him.
-Did you laugh? I say
-What a bitch you are.
I press the gun even harder into the back of his neck.And I'm pushing him up the stairs to get the hell out of here. He opens the door and goes out, and I follow him, I'm not even tired of putting my shirt on.The gun was at the back of his head and I was pushing him from behind.We both walked like that to the corner. And when I suddenly hear
-What the hell ?
I raise my head and see him, Eren and four other soldiers walking down that hall. What are you doing here? I didn't even manage to react that all the soldiers were with weapons at me, I raise my hands. I fall to my knees because I couldn't stand it anymore.Soldiers I threatened. he turns to me and laughs, He grabs the gun from my hand and sticks it in my forehead
-Come on, do you want to see how your brains fly on the walls?
He hits me in the face.He grabs my chin and puts the gun in my mouth.I didn't even try to look at Eren, he hasn't done anything to help me so far.
-Come on, beg me to not kill you
He leans over me and puts his hand on my abdomen he tried to raise his hand, but before he could do that, I hit him hard in the stomach, He falling on his back the soldiers tried to get close to stop me, but he nodded.
-How pathetic, I said
He gets up and points his gun at me, he was angry, I smile involuntarily.
-Go and kill me, come one kill me.
-To end your suffering?
-Do you think that's why you don't shoot? You are afraid, Isn't it better to go back to the stalls? The annoying soldier hits me in the face with his boot.I fall and he puts his boot over my head. Before he says anything, I hear some applause.And on the right I see Ikirac approaching
-I like it, he said
-That I'm being tortured or?
-The attitude,finished playing back in the cell,come up
-Come up ? i ask
-Ah I forgot, Eren doesn't stay there anymore and take your girlfriend back to her cell
-No, can't someone else take me? I ask with a sigh
-Do you think you can choose?Isn't torture enough for you? we solve immediately, He gets on his knees next to me and whispers
-I told you to listen to me or you forgot
-Ah, what would my mother say about that? The older brother makes his sister a servant, a perfect picture.
It looks like I'm annoying him but he doesn't say anything, he gets up and just adds
-Put on a T-shirt because you're distracting all the soldiers
-Do you even know why I don't have a T-shirt?
-How many times have I told you I don't care?
-Your soldier tried to rape me.
-Well, you're looking for it
-I ask for it ? How can you say that ? , You're pathetic , you and your stupid plan, I hope you die, look take the gun and kill yourself, I ask for it, damn it.
Eren and the soldiers stared blankly. at the circus I created.
Without saying anything, Ikirac lifted me off the ground and hit me in the stomach with his knee, then let me bleed.From below I could see how he was saying something to the soldiers and then they all left, apart from Eren. He was approaching me, I was crying, how embarrassing.
-Big Brother ? he asks me
-Is that what you're interested in now?
He didn't answer, he tried to lift me off the floor. I moan in pain.Notice this and slow down, lift me in his arms but not like Ikirac, but gentle,
Without saying anything, he headed for the cell. We arrive and he leaves me on the bed without saying anything It is better like that I don't want to talk to him anyway.
But after a few minutes I see him coming with a briefcase, a medical briefcase,Oh, don't tell me he's going to take care of me now. Bend down and remove the cotton wool and alcohol.He's starting to disinfect all my wounds, and bandaged them. Yesterday he told me to shoot myself and now he's taking care of me.
-And since when you care ?
-who said i care ?
-Then why the hell are you bandaging me?
-That's what Ikirac told me
-So now he's your boss, isn't he?
-Well, it's a boss for you too
-Why the hell did you get into this, he's not trustworthy, and if he promised you something he wouldn't do it.
-Who said he promised me something ?
-Then why ? Why did you accept that?
-Because I want to know the truth, I want to know what titans are, where they come from , I want to kill them all
-What a child you are, I say laughing
-Why did you beg him not to involve me in this? I do what I want
-I have what?
-In the evening you had the gun, he told me he was thinking of finding someone else , because you asked him, you asked him to take me out of the mission.
-What the hell, That never happened. And if it happened, why you didn't ask me why I did that. I mean, you really didn't need to challenge me to shoot you, I say with a smile
Eren smiles and sits down next to me on the bed.
-It was more fun that way
-I like Eren better when he wants to kill me.
-You like it until he shoots you.
We start laughing
-By the way I heard that you accepted the mission, it's not like you couldn't refuse, you really want to be titan ?
-Who the hell told you I wanted that?
-Ikirac ?
-I was forced, I was tied on a chair until he gave me the injection , and now what to do?
-You're can try to adapt
-Hell, I could have done something then, now I can't do anything
-Do what? Do you really like coming into conflict with him? I keep seeing you arguing with him and in the end you are also the wounded
-Because I don't want to be his maid, i would like to be hurt 100 times better than him being my boss
-is this also in the case of soldiers?
-What do you mean?
-Well, every time you challenge them,you even tell them to shoot you.
-Ah, this is for fun Anyway, who would kill the great boss Ikirac's sister, no one, that the ideia
-And you told me i am the child ?
We start laughing.We sat and talked about what had happened in the last few days until it got dark.
At last I felt my feet,I could walk almost normally
As I walked through the cell, I heard Eren say.
-You're lucky, tomorrow is your last day. Know that we miss your food
I laugh and throw a pillow at Eren.
And after a few moments he adds
-I think I have to go,Captain Levi and Ikirac will be ...
-Ohoho Captain Ikirac, do you really care so much about him?
-Well, what will he say when he finds out I'm in the cell with the captain's sister
-"He'll tell you you're stupid," Ikirac says from behind bars.
-Captain, forgive me, I didn't know you were here.
-See Kayo? I think you should call me captain, too.
-Not way, I prefer to die, but why were you spying on us
-I was watching your teenage hormones go crazy, and he look at Eren, By the way, Eren, take Kayo and come with me.
-I can go by myself
-Where, Eren ask
-In Kayo's favorite room, torture chamber.
-Wait, why? eren ask
-To turn kayo into titan.
-I didn't need torture, says Eren
-Ah Eren, you didn't need it. because you didn't make fun of your brother.
-Still haven't passed? I said
-And why do I have to go? Eren ask
-You will torture her
-Wait what? I ask
-No, Eren answer
-Oh did Kayo teach you to say no?
-N-no, but I don't want to do that.
-Well, if you don't do it, I'll do it
-Why the fuck are you doing this?
-And lose the fun? How can I not see how lovers suffer, Eren I give you better advice you torture her that if I do it will not be good
-We are not in love. He doesn't even care about me and I don't care about him So your plan doesn't work
-I refuse to do that
-Are you serious now? i said
-Ikirac I hate you with all my heart You're an idiot, Why don't you let me have a normal teenager, I said
-You would get bored of a normal adolescence
-And you, Eren, are pathetic, you let him to torture me?
-It suits me, come on.
-So I don't have to go anymore?
-Oh yes, you will watch
We all go to the white room at the end of the hall When we're close, Eren whispers to me
-Don't be afraid, all you need is a deep wound and you transform.
Hearing this, Ikirac tells me
-Do you think I don't know? It will be the slowest torture.
We arrive, Ikirac opens the door and pushes me inside.
I see the same room, the same chair and the same chains I'm going to be tied to.
-Eren tied her up there
-Don't tell me you're really listening to him.
-I have nothing to do, he's the boss, let's go
It won't take long, I tell myself, it will be easy
-That's how I kept thinking about what I could do to not cause you deep wounds Palms and fists, nails removed, and small cuts with knives
Without saying anything, he took the knife He took my hand and turned it over He started making small scratches on my skin.They're not that painful, I resist
After making my whole hand full of scratches he said:
-It doesn't even cause you pain anymore, does it?
I don't answer, deep wounded, how deep?
-I told you, you would be punished but you didn't believe me, he said and hit me hard on the face.
-And do you think you can solve something if you punish me?
-No, but I make you suffer
-You think so ?
He hit me in the face once more, this time harder.I feel my cheeks turn red.
He hit me 3 more times in the face, and then seeing that I have no reaction, he pulls out the pliers
Without even expecting it, a nail is removed I close my eyes in pain and moan.
-Look me in my eyes, tell me everything it is not fine.
-Go kill yourself you crazy mf, why do you do that to me, i am your sister.
-i don't give a fuck, your pain it satisfies me
-You are sick.
And another nail is removed, this time I moan much harder, I can not resist.
-This moan of yours makes me think of something else.
-You're a pervert
Two more blows to the stomach followed, I was silent, I don't want to give him satisfaction
-Won't accept your silence, BEG ME, beg me for forgiveness.
-Never
-Did you think you could get away so easily? I am the sickness i am the violence.
-You are crazy and admit you are toxic
-You will never get rid of me, you are only a servant, my servant.
He took the knife from the table and stabbed me in the stomach,deep wound. It's over. The transformation begins, I'm, I'm a titan. I feel the power My Titan looked like Eren's sharp muscles and teeth. I'm trying to move but I'm immobilized, is that still a side effect? I look at Ikirac
-Did you think I'd let you do what you wanted? The injection contains a substance that numbs your body.
I don't move, I just look, I'm a monster Thoughts invade my had. How long have I been standing still? Have I changed now or have I been staying for a long time?
After 10 minutes Ikirac tells Eren
-Saying how to get back to normal, I'm bored
-Kayo listen to me, it will be painful at first You're going to have to pull on those muscles that hold your face.and then your body will do the same
I pull, I pull I can't, am I too weak? nothing happens
-Does that have to happen? Ikirac asks
-She doesn't have enough power, and we don't have equipment.
-Kayo, you are so weak, Ikirac shouted
I don't understand what they're telling me I can not hear anything Everything gets dark Before I lose consciousness, I pull once more, I struggle hard, I don't feel anything anymore, did I succeed? I fall, I fall from above, I have succeeded, I see only smoke, and my body hits the floor hard
