Pinky promise? (gxg)

Chapter 4

Anna

"Scared of what? It was just a game, it didn't mean anything"

A sting passed through my body at her words.

It didn't mean anything

Of course I knew it wasn't supposed to mean anything. It was a game and the whole point was for people to kiss. It wasn't supposed to be a big deal. But still, somewhere deep down, I had hoped that maybe it would have meant even a little as much to her as it meant to me.

But it wasn't supposed to mean anything to me either. Because I wasn't gay. I liked boys. And I definitely didn't like Jo.

But the more I tried to deny it, the harder it became.

I had tried to completely ignore my apparent feelings that the kiss had made me face. And when that stopped working, I had made countless excuses for them. The one I had settled on was that it was because Jo was my best friend, so it was only natural that I felt close to her. But somehow I didn't quite believe that was the only reason.

It scared me. When Jo kissed me, it was like I realised something. And I didn't want to feel these things.

I wasn't supposed to think about girls that way. It was completely derailing from my life plan. I was supposed to date boys, then eventually get married to a nice man and have a nice little family. Being gay wasn't in that plan. It wasn't me, I was supposed to be normal.

_____________

The next morning I woke up to about a dozen messages on my phone.

I had put my phone to charge before Jo came over last night and hadn't opened it until now. Hence why I hadn't noticed them until now.

I opened my phone and saw that the messages were from the group chat with the girls. There were also a couple of missed calls and voice mails from Chase. Curious I opened one of the voice mails.

"Where are youuu babe? You're missing out on a lot of fun" I heard Chase's drunken slurs from the device.

Shoot, the party. I forgot all about it. I scolded myself for forgetting. This was going to be a mess to sort out.

But I couldn't help but feel glad about missing the party. Parties weren't really my thing anyway. There was loud music and sweaty drunk teenagers grinding on each other everywhere. It just made me uncomfortable.

Chase's voice mails were all about the same as the first one. He just got increasingly drunker with each one. I then moved on to the group chat where the girls were also asking where I was. There were also a few shaky selfies and other texts with a million different emojis.

None of it made me regret that I wasn't there.

I sent a quick text to the group chat apologizing and saying something came up. I decided to call Chase later since he was probably still sleeping off his hangover.

After that, I went downstairs to find myself some breakfast. As I made my way down the stairs a delicious smell wafted from the kitchen. My eyes instantly lit up.

Mum was in the kitchen cooking waffles when I came in. They looked delicious, she even had jam on the table.

"Good morning mum", I greeted her and kissed her on her temple.

"Morning sweetie", mum smiled at me.

"What's the special occasion?"

"Oh nothing special, I got a day off today so I thought I would surprise you kids"

Wow mum must be in a super good mood, we usually only have waffles when it's someone's birthday. I smiled at mum.

"Alright they're almost done, would you go wake up Marcus for me honey"

_____________

Despite my promises, I found myself texting Jo that night.

My hands hovered over the keyboard for a while.

10:22 pm

Me: Hi

I exhaled a breath I hadn't noticed I had been holding. I was suddenly sweating nervously. Would she think it was weird that I was texting her. Oh god, she thinks I'm weird. Why did I think this was a good idea.

A tiny text "online" popped up under her id.

Oh no, she has seen it. Why isn't she responding. Maybe she hates me, I would hate me too. I was deeply regretting sending the text now.

10:25 pm

Jo: hi

A few moments passed. I had forgotten to think this far, what was I supposed to say now.

10:27 pm

Me: How are you?

10:27 pm

Jo: i'm okay, you?

10:28 pm

Me: Yeah I'm fine. I can't sleep.

10:29 pm

Jo: it's half 11 Ann

I couldn't miss the tiny jump my heart did at her nickname.

10:31 pm

Me: Yes exactly, a good time to be going to sleep.

10.33 pm

Jo: want to go to the park?

I contemplated this for a few seconds, even though my immediate reaction was to say yes. I wasn't keen on breaking rules though, and sneaking out was definitely breaking some rule.

But it was probably a fact that Jo could ask me anything, and I would likely do it.

10:36 pm

Me: Sure.

I opened the window as quietly as I could and climbed out into the chilly night air. I felt like a spy as I slid off the roof below my window to the ground, but in reality, it was probably quite anticlimactic. Now that I thought about it, I could have just left through the front door, it would have been much more practical. Was I even thinking straight anymore, sneaking out like this.

AN:

So yikes, it's been a while. I'm sorry for not updating, I have no good excuse. 

On other news exam weeks are over and it's beginning to be warmer here which is super nice. Spring is well on it's way and I'm excited for the sunlight and the new leaves, it's going to be so pretty in a few weeks:D