14 Therapy

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"Hello Faolan." Dr. Barnes greets me.

"Quack." I nod... it's not that I want to be rude but I just don't want to be here. Maybe if I tick him off enough he'll say I'm good just to get rid of me... it could work.

"Original." The shrink chuckles as he takes a seat at his desk. "So where would you like to start?"

"I'd like to start with not being here." I grumble looking at the floor.

"Perfect!" He cheers and I snap my head up. What the crap?

"I'll gladly start there. So Faolan why are you so afraid of sharing your feelings that you feel the need to lash out at anyone trying to help you?" He asks and I growl.

"Screw you shrink boy!"

"I'm happily mated so I'm gonna have to pass on that, pup. Plus my grandpup is around your age so that is just creepy." He smirks at me and I shut up. This is gonna be a long hour.

°•°•°•°•°•

Stupid frickin' shrink and his stupid comebacks and his stupid smug face.

"Hey Way!" A cheery voice breaks through my grumbling thoughts. "Dad said you were seeing Doc Barnes. He is so cool right? I'm so proud of you!"

"Does this family share everything!" I yell stopping her. "Can't a guy keep one part of his life to himself?! Its no one's business that I'm here!"

I see Willow go from hurt to ticked off in three seconds flat.

"When it comes to MY mate it is my business! And I don't know the details of what is going on I just asked where you went thinking I'd surprise my man with an early lunch and a run, but I don't see him here. Come find me when Faolan reinhabits your body!" She yells and storms off.

I don't think therapy is helping.

°•°•°•°•°•°•

Day two.

"You know I won't share anything you say in here with anyone." Doc Barnes says after 25 minutes of silence.

"Really it seems like my personal business is a common topic of discussion amongst this pack." I grumble.

"Oh you mean your mate talks to her father and grandfather about her life? It must be rough to know she cares about you so much that she can't help but talk about you." The shrink responds. Stupid sarcastic prick!

"Why can't people just leave me alone?!" I yell. I've been doing fine for years! Why now?

"Why are you so hostile? Why do you need to be the best? Why do you have nightmares?" He asks.

"How did you know I have nightmares?" I ask and he shrugs.

"I guessed... oh wait I probably shouldn't say that. I used my many years of experience and training to deduce that you likely have nightmares... And you confirmed it so good on you we're talking now!" He answers and I growl. I really hate this guy!

°•°•°•°•°•°•°

Day Three

"How about you tell me how training with the big dogs is going?" Dr. Shrink says after me not talking for about 10 different questions he tried.

"Its good... still can't pin Gamma Asher but he takes me down less. No more nervous breakdowns if that's what you're asking." I tell him.

"I wasn't but considering you brought it up, why were you so adamant that you needed to beat him on your first day?" I sigh knowing I opened myself up to this discussion.

"I was... trained in an... alternative way. I needed... I need to be the best to make it worth it... I told all this to the Gamma why do I need to talk to you?" I ask.

"You need to let your feelings out. You need to face what has happened to you and what you've done. You need to open up so you can heal." He explains.

"The wounds of my past have healed what good does opening old wounds do?" I ask. Why can't anyone just let it go? Let the past stayed buried.

"You're right." He says and my jaw drops. "You've moved on and let the pain get tucked away deep inside... You know when a wound heals sometimes it can trap an infection deep inside. You know what a doctor does to heal it? They cut it open and scrape out the infection. It causes more pain at first and its hard to bring all that to the surface but once its out the doctor helps the person heal correctly. That's what I want to do for you. I want to bring out what causes your pain and insecurities then help you process it in a way that promotes healing... or you can let it fester until it needs amputated. However in your case I'm not referring to a limb. You know what will be amputated from you if you let the infection spread? Your family, the pack, your mate. If you don't deal with yourself you will end up hurting everyone who cares about you and alienating yourself from those who love you. You will cut yourself off from them and I don't want to see you do that... But I can't force you to do anything. You have to decide what you are willing to lose. You can lose your pride and accept help or lose everyone who loves you. Choose well."

I stare at him for a good ten minutes before looking away.

"Were gonna need more than an hour Doc." I mumble.

"I have all the time in the world pup." He smiles and I sigh.

"I was ten years old when I met the Beta of my pack..."

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