The Varied Path (Akatsuki no Yona Fanfiction)

Chapter 164: Resurfacing Insecurities

Damn it.

It could have been bad. A lot could have happened in the moment that she left her side, even though she was only gone for a minute.

Awkwardly, Calista shuffled her feet, shifting from side to side as she did a quick sweep of their surroundings and the baffled princess.

Yona tilted her head curiously. "What are you doing?"

Pursing her lips, Calista gave her what she hoped was a reassuring smile of sorts. This was weird.

She wasn't used to this.

Ever since they were little, it was Hak who had looked out for and protected Yona. With every breath, he dedicated himself fully to her. He had always been by her side.

And she had been taking it for granted.

With her brother there, she didn't need to worry as much, always opting to look out for him since he would always prioritize the princess first. It was a chain, a routine woven together so intricately that it was second nature, and it never failed.

She found herself double-checking for his presence, only to balk in surprise when there was nothing there.

Calista almost didn't know what to do. The squirrel sitting on her shoulder squeaked and pushed her paws against her cheek, to which the girl petted her softly, thanking her for the small sense of comfort.

Rolling her stiff shoulders she forced herself to relax as Yona got visibly more worried the longer she stayed silent.

It's been a while since I've put it into practice, huh, Soo-won?

Chest deflating as she let out a breath, Calista straightened up and leaned her back against the wall as her panic slowed. She had forgotten what it was like, how lonely it was when her annoying brother was not with her.

How it felt when her one duty was to protect her master.

"Sorry for scaring you, Yona." Calista grinned sheepishly, the smile lopsided as she carded a hand through her unruly hair and answered the unspoken question in her eyes. "I'm okay, I promise. There's nothing wrong."

Yona rocked back and forth on her heels, clasping her hands behind her as she returned her smile instinctively.

Calista didn't know if her dropping the topic was out of consideration for her prickling unease or if her friend decided to let it pass knowing that pressing for answers would only put up her guard.

Either way, she knew the princess was aware something was a little off but she was grateful that she didn't pressure the issue.

But a jerky movement that felt out of place stole her attention in a split second.

Her silver eyes flitted over Yona in concern but the princess caught on quickly to what she was doing and waved her off, giving her the nonverbal okay that she was fine.

Mostly.

She hesitated for a beat.

Calista's eyes narrowed as she recognized the tell-tale signs that the princess was definitely tricking herself into pretending that she was okay but she kept her mouth shut, knowing very well that anything she tried to say right now about romantic feelings would fall on deaf ears.

It wasn't as though Yona would be against any advice, their princess was nothing if not open-minded, but it was that she hadn't come to terms with it herself and wouldn't be able to process anything else anyone said about it without having formed her own opinion.