𝖶𝖨𝖢𝖪𝖤𝖣 𝖧𝖠𝖳𝖤 | 𝖥𝖱𝖤𝖣 𝖶𝖤𝖠𝖲𝖫𝖤𝖸

61

"Oh, Lilith..."

"I think I'm in love with him, Remus," I whispered, calmly. "No, I know I love him." I sniffed a bit because of the cold air. "My Patronus has changed, it isn't a German Sheppard anymore, it is a magpie. Just like his."

"Dear, that's... the purest show of love someone could ever have by far. I'd lie if I say this caught me completely by surprise because it didn't. Unbelievable how it seems, I've started to know you too well and you look at him in such a familiar way that I know it's unmistakable."

I sighed hard, playing with my nails. "I haven't confessed it to him, though."

"Well, I can't tell you anything about him because even though the twins seem to behave like an open book, they truly don't. But, from my experience, hiding your feelings for someone who you're close to only works to waste time."

"I don't know. I don't think I'm ready yet. It scares me to- "I breathed deeply. " To think that he might not feel the same for me. And, what do I expect if he actually does — which I really doubt —? To start a relationship in the middle of a magic war knowing that I might confront my mother and not live to tell the tale? Or to live constantly with the fear of him abandoning me? Nah, I'm not ready. Besides, if I do survive the war, I want to focus on therapy. I can't keep living with this fucking trauma."

"And that's completely valid, dear. It doesn't matter what I can advise you or not, your feelings are only and completely yours to deal with them and to choose with who you share them."

I rested my head again on Remus's shoulder and interlaced my arm with his. Opening myself to the only adult figure I felt truly safe and comfortable with, was like having a little taste of what I would have felt if I had had a caring father who actually stayed with me, and I knew I'll never be thankful enough for having Remus Lupin in my life.

We stayed there for the rest of the night, watching the sunrise, chatting in a low voice and supporting each other. I can't exactly remember when we fell asleep in that exact position but, by the time I felt someone's hand on my shoulder waking me up, the sun was up in the almost clear sky. Summer had clearly arrived in South England.

"Morning, beautiful." Fred crooned funnily ironic as he was sitting on his heels, looking at me with his shiny brown eyes, a mischievous smile and the sun brightening back in his ginger hair, being a little bit messed up by the morning wind.

I raised my head from Remus's shoulder, who was still asleep against the woody handrail of the porch.

"Morning..." I replied with a sleepy and hoarse voice, rubbing my eyes to wake me up properly. "What time is it?"

"Nine in the morning, more or less," his smile grew on his face. "I know the Burrow isn't pretty big but, you do know we have beds inside, right? You don't need to sleep on the stairs."

I snorted, putting a hand in front of my face to avoid the sunlight hitting me straight in it. "Oh, shut up, the Burrow is perfect. Remus wanted to get a bit of fresh air and we ended up falling asleep."

"Well, then you should get your pretty face inside before the Order arrives with Ron and Ginny and think we have kicked you two out of the house. Also, Remus gotta go to King's Cross to look after Harry."

"Did something else happen to him?" I asked a bit worried.

"Nah, I heard something about his muggle family and the Order wanting to make sure they treat him properly. I've seen them before and if all muggles are like the Dursleys, then I want them all far away from me. Weird as fuck that people."

I snickered a little bit. "Yeah, I bet you aren't used to the muggle world, are you, Freddie?"

His eyebrows raised playfully. "Are you, Lilith?"