chapter 4

23 2 8
                                    

Sol

Ethan and I have been talking and getting to know each other way more recently. It scares me a little bit. The only person I've ever talked to in an actual deep conversation is Ivy, and while she's my best friend and all, I still have hella trust issues.

Anyways, it's Saturday and Ethan asked if I wanted to hang out with him after his lacrosse practice. I didn't have anything better to do, so here I am, sitting on the bleachers watching them "run drills" or whatever the hell they're doing.

Ivy walks up to me with a cup in her hand and holds it out towards me. I take it and look up at her, squinting from the sun. I texted her and told her I was here; lucky for me, she had twenty minutes to kill before having her to go to work for the day.

"Hey, watching your man practice?" She asked teasingly, sitting down next to me and sipping her own cup. "Oh shut up," I shoved her lightly. "He's just trying to be a friend. What'd you get me?" She laughed and shook her head, she didn't believe me. "It's a smoothie. It's good for you, or so they say. Probably some scam, but it tastes good." She chuckles, taking another sip from her own.

"So, are you here stalking him, if not watching him on the sidelines as his girl?" She drags on. "Stop, oh my god," I shake my head, looking up at the sky. "He asked to hang out and I didn't have plans."

"Aww, that's sweet. Sorry I couldn't hang today, I have work in less than an hour." Ivy explains. She works at the Starbucks right down the street from the school. "It's fine, Ethan is pretty cool." I watch as the team dismembers, going back to the locker room.

"Looks like he's gonna be back for ya soon, I'll leave you to it. Have fun!" Ivy gets up and heads out. I wave goodbye and walk towards the field. I spot Ethan running towards me, and stand still.

"Hey! Thanks for waiting, I couldn't miss practice today." Ethan smiles, and I look away from his eyes. "It's no problem, Ivy was with me while I waited." Ethan nodded, mumbling a "cool" under his breath.

Grayson walks up behind Ethan, "Hey man, wanna head home and play videos games now? Aaron's coming over." Grayson wipes the sweat off his forehead and I try not to visually eavesdrop by distracting myself with my phone. "Actually," Ethan starts, "I'm gonna hang out with Sol today. I invited her here and we're just gonna go out to grab a bite to eat or something. But I'll be home later." Grayson raises his eyebrows, he looks surprised at what he's hearing. Honestly I am too. He's hanging with me instead of his buddies? Weirdo.

"Oh okay. See you back at the house, I guess." Grayson walks back down the bleachers and towards the back parking lot. Ethan turns back towards me. "Ready?" He asks.

"Yup," I smile. "Let's go."

—————

We're at McDonald's right now, laughing and talking about the silliest things. I sip my drink as Ethan tells me about the time he absolutely wrecked his skateboard trying to do a trick and failing. "It was a disaster! So embarrassing. You had to be there." He laughs out loud.

"I bet." I chuckle and shake my head. Suddenly, Ethan's phone dings. He picks it up and reads the notification. "Ooo, there's a party at Alex's tonight. Wanna come with me?" He looks up at me.

I laugh, "Are you hearing yourself right now?" I raise my eyebrows. "Yes, we wouldn't be like dates or anything, just friends showing up together. It's not like it'll matter, no one will care. The entire school will be there; they'll be focusing on people doing keg stands or something. C'mon, it'll be fun!" He urges. I roll my eyes and smile. He's so annoying, but for some reason I don't want him to stop. "Okay okay, fine. What time are we going?"

"Uhh, like 10." He reads his phone again. I nod my head. A school party. I've been to plenty, but not with anyone. Let's see how this goes.

————

Ethan and I get out of his jeep and head towards the house. Apparently Grayson and everybody else had gotten to the party early, to help set up I guess. You can hear the music from what feels like two blocks away. I pull a cigarette and my lighter out of my pocket, "Go in, it's fine. I'm gonna smoke so I'll catch up with you later." I wave him away and he walks through the door.

I light my cigarette and look around at the scenery in front of me. Alex has a nice ass house. I take a puff and look in the other direction, seeing Grayson standing against the house. We make eye contact and he comes and sits down next to me.

"I don't know what your deal is with my brother, but you better not hurt him." His words are low, and his eyes are stern. I furrow my eyebrows, "I don't know who the fuck you think you're talking to, but there's no 'deal' with him. We're just friends, if that. So fuck off-"

"No," Grayson cuts me off. "I'm serious. If you hurt him or fuck with him, I'll make your life a living hell. Ethan tends to see the good in people, and it isn't always good for him. If you plan on sticking around just to use him or something, just go now." He stands up and walks back into the house, leaving me on the porch, speechless.

Is that what people think I'm doing when they see him and I together? I'm not even the one pursuing this friendship, he is. Whatever, fuck it. I drop my cigarette on the concrete and walk into the house. I spot the alcohol at the table and take a cup, filling it with vodka. I turn around and sip my drink. God, that's strong.

I spot Ethan in a group of people and walk over to him. He looks in my direction and clinks his cup with mine, laughing. He must be buzzed already. "I was waiting for you to come inside! Wanna play beer pong with me and the guys?" He asks loudly, making sure I can hear him over the music. I nod my head, "Sure, lead the way!" I sip my drink once again.

Ethan takes my hand and suddenly I feel very warm, his hand feels nice against mine. What the fuck are you even thinking? I shake the thoughts out of my head and realize that Ethan has stopped walking. "It's already set up. Do you wanna go first, or should I?" he asks. "You can go first." I reply, still needing a minute to come down from what just happened.

—————

Beer pong was fun, we ended up winning. I didn't know Ethan was a master beer pong player. I was feeling rather tipsy so I headed back outside, this time to the back porch. Sitting in a chair and sipping on beer now, I reflected on how I felt earlier when Ethan held my hand. What the fuck even was that? I heard the door open and turned my head. Just to my luck, it was an also tipsy Ethan walking out of the house, sighing in relief when he saw me.

"There you are, thank god." He sat down in the chair closest to me. "I was worried that you left." He scoots closer to me. "No, I just...needed some air." I look at him. For some reason he looks different now. He looks...beautiful. Everyone knows he's attractive, even he does himself. But right now in this moment, it felt like I could look at him forever. "So do you wanna get going soon?" He looks out at the lawn in front of us. "It's like 1 am already." He laughed. "Yeah. Can I crash at your place? I can like sleep on the couch or something." I ask, scratching the back of my head.

"Of course, yeah. It's no problem. Let's go." He stands, almost falling with how intoxicated he is. I start laughing uncontrollably in my seat. "Fuck, are you okay?" I ask, wheezing. He starts laughing, too, "Yeah, I'm fine. But I can't really drive like this. Maybe Grayson can take us back, he doesn't really drink. I'll go get him." I nod and he walks back into the house for Grayson. I stay outside, finishing my beer and pulling out a cigarette.

Remembering what Grayson said earlier, I sigh. I'm not gonna use Ethan. He seems like a true friend; at least I hope so. I also hope that he sticks around me for a while, I've grown somewhat attached to him.

Fuck, I think I have a crush on Ethan.

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