Let me in

Chapter 5 : A hint of anger.

But Buck doesn't even answer. And if he doesn't, well, Eddie thinks he must be really, really mad. Because even when he's angry or upset or offended, Buck still responds to Bobby. Even if it's a grunt, even if it's just a whisper, even if it's just a monosyllable. He always answers.

Bobby seems to realize it too, because he doesn't try to catch up with Buck and for the rest of the day they all give him the space he needs.

Buck stays professional and efficient during the shift, seems to put all this stuff aside with ease and Eddie is not surprised, because Buck is always focused when he is working. It's the only thing that can make him momentarily forget about everything bad that can happen in his life. Eddie knows it, and he understands it, because that's how he feels too; working has always helped him take his mind off things.

But he knows it works for a while, not forever. Eddie doesn't want Buck to keep this anger to himself, he doesn't want what happened to him to happen to Buck; he doesn't want it to overwhelm him and destroy everything. He doesn't want that for his best friend.

So he'll go talk to him, he'll stop by his house after their shift, after asking Carla to keep Christopher a little longer. He'll bring back a six-pack and he'll listen to Buck whine about his parents, Maddie and Chimney, for as long as he wants.

Because that's what a best friend does. He hasn't been very good so far, he wants to be good now.

But when he knocks on his door less than an hour later, no one answers.
And when he uses his key to get in, there's no one inside.

All he can do is sigh and drop himself on the sofa, putting the six-pack on the coffee table. He hesitates for a moment, then pulls out his phone, writing a message to let him know he's home, wondering inwardly what could possibly keep him so busy on a Wednesday after four o'clock in the afternoon not to answer it.

When it's past five o'clock and he still has no answer, he picks up the pack from the table to put it in the fridge and leaves his best friend's apartment.

His son is waiting for him.

[...]

Buck can't believe his parents are sticking around.

He's had time to think about it all day, but he doesn't understand, and he doesn't accept it.

He doesn't want to and he can't.

Because Maddie is right - although he won't admit it - he fell back into their game too easily.

And maybe it's no longer to make them angry, maybe it's no longer to get their attention, maybe now it's only to hurt them... But that doesn't change the fact that it's unhealthy. Maybe it's even more unhealthy than it used to be.

He used to want to hurt them so that they could get a glimpse of what he was feeling. Now he wants to hurt them just because it makes him feel good.

And he must be really twisted to feel that way.

They see each other just once, and he's already thinking and acting like a person he's not. That he's not anymore. A mean, evil, noxious person.

What will become of him if he is forced to see them during... God knows how long?

He doesn't want to be like that.

"Such beautiful eyes shouldn't be so sad." The woman who'd been staring at him at the other end of the bar since he walked in sits beside him and smiles at him.

Buck's been thinking about it since he met her eyes more than half an hour ago. He's still thinking about it right now.

Bobby would probably kill him if he knew.

Except it's different this time. If he goes, if he goes in there tonight, it's only going to be a one-time thing.

He's got a right to have a sex life, right?

So he chooses his next words carefully.

"I'm not sad. Just a little tense." He smiles as he turns to her.

His pretty green eyes watch him for a moment, tapping her fingers on the counter, as if it were her turn to think.

"What's your little name?" She asks.

Buck hesitates just for a second.

"Evan. You?"

It's going to be Evan tonight and nothing that happens from now on is going to get to Buck.

"Okay, Evan. My name is Olivia and I have something that might help you relax." She smiles as she reaches into the inside pocket of her jacket and pulls out a small sachet of white powder that she quietly waves around.

Buck's eyes are immediately drawn to the plastic, which catches the light and glows. And they stick to it like a magnet.

His heart pounds in his chest as if he is seeing his first great teenage love again. And in fact, it is a little bit. It hurts and it feels good. It's painful at first, and then it's pleasant afterwards. And above all, it's very tempting.

And Bobby would definitely kill him if he knew.

He did not expect that, really not. And maybe it's a sign, the fact that someone shake this in front of him specially today. But... He can't. And he won't.

So at the expense of an addiction, he chooses another one.

"Thank you, but... This is not what I had in mind."

Olivia responds with an interested smile, putting the bag back in her jacket.

She bends over and puts one hand high on his thigh, seductive.

"In that case, pretty heart... Please, show me."

//

I know it's late, sorry! I don't know if I'll ever be on time... 😅

Anyway, here it is! Buddie is coming, I promise you. 😏

See you soon for more! 🖤

Kisses on all of you! 💋