It's Always Been You [Josie Saltzman]

I Thought Math Was Hard

I sat on my bed nursing another wounded soul. That's the funny thing, isn't it? When someone finally thinks that after all of this pain, after all of this suffering they've endured in their past and everything finally starts to look up, and then a few moments later everything starts slipping from their grasp.

I mean I had the girl that I always wanted. Josette Saltzman, everyone always went for Lizzie, but there was always something about Josie that just brought out the good in me. I think I've had a crush on her since I got to the Salvatore School and she was right there. And then I turned into a hybrid for fuck's sake! And then a ripper and my mom's Parker? It's like my life's some sad book where the protagonist can't catch a break. Like can I be happy for once?!

But this is the right thing. She needs to be safe. She can't be with me. The only thing I can do to her is hurt her. She needs someone to love her, she doesn't deserve someone like me.

"Earth to B?" Hope said, waving her hand across my face. We were in the middle of training when I just needed a break. Sure Hope isn't a vampire, but she's been teaching me how to control my blood lust and everything she's learned from her family, "Where'd you go just now?"

I shook my head, "Sorry. I don't even know."

"Well you did an awesome job today. You're getting better by the second. How's the bloodlust?" she asked and I nodded.

"Better, I'm drinking from the blood bags and slowly allowing myself to feed on the real blood bags that Kaleb hides." I reply and she nods.

"Good, good. Are you coming to movie night in the twins room? Everyone's gonna be there Jed and the rest of the boys." she offers, hoping that I'll get back to my normal life.

But to her disappointment I shook my head, "No, I have homework to do today, but maybe next time." I said and she smiled softly.

"You can't be afraid to face everyone forever." she confronted the issue that everyone knew about.

"I know, I'm just not ready yet."

I parted ways with Hope, but I ran into someone on my way, "Shoot, I'm so sorry." I looked up to see the twins with a blonde woman. I smiled softly, "Hey Lizzie, Jo. I didn't mean to run into you. I was just rushing to get my homework done."

"So you're the infamous Bentley I've heard so much about." the blonde lady spoke up and I nodded, kind of unsure who this woman is. But she sticks her hand out with a small smile on her face, "I'm Caroline Forbes. The twin's mom."

My face contorted into shock, before taking her hands and shaking it, "It's nice to meet you. Your daughters are really awesome, they've made my life here so much easier. So props to you for raising such amazing girls. But I should go, I have homework to do and a song that I'm writing."

"You're writing again?" Josie asked and I finally got a good look at her. Her eyes were a tad puffy and her mascara was ruined like she had been crying. My heart sunk in my chest at the sight and I wanted nothing more than to just wrap my arms around her and hold her, but I couldn't. I can't.

I nodded, "Yeah. It's something that came to mind. It was nice meeting you Ms. Forbes. I'll see you two later."

Lizzie grabbed my wrist softly, "Are you coming to movie night tonight?"

I shook my head, "I can't. I'm sorry. Now if you'll excuse me."

I used my vamp-speed to get up to my room as quickly as possible. My emotions were already heightened and feeling sadness was much worse as a hybrid than a regular werewolf. I closed my door, placing my head into my hands, crying softly.