It's Always Been You [Josie Saltzman]

It's Everything I Never Wanted

A tense silence looms over the bell tower. The real Jed actually regains strength and consciousness.
"What...what happened?" Jed asks, looking at everyone.
Everyone has a sad look on their face, except for Landon who just looks unbothered.
Jed's gaze lands on Bentley who is still unconscious, "What's wrong with B?! Why is she not breathing?" he asks, trying to rush to her side.
But Kaleb and MG hold him back, "She needs her space."
"No let me go! What's wrong with her?" he yells, but the boys vampire-strength is enough to hold him back.
No one wanted to speak. To really admit what is happening. The fact that one of their own may actually be dead.
"She might be dead." Landon whispers, looking out towards the town he once knew and loved.
"What?!" Jed asks, incredulously.
"They did a stupid thing." the curly hair boy says back.
That was enough to make Lizzie snap, her cheeks staining with tears, "No! We did a stupid thing in choosing to save you! We could've easily given you up for whatever the hell the nogitsune wanted from you! But we knew that B did not want that." she says getting dangerously close to his face, "So do not ever say that what we did a stupid thing because we just saved your life!"
That causes the mop head to shut his mouth and goes back to looking at the town in front of him. Hope is still pacing back and forth, unsure of what's going to happen. If she didn't do it in time, she would never forgive herself.
Josie is sitting unsure of what to do, still clinging onto Bentley like her actual life depended on it. And who knows maybe it did? But she sits there clinging onto the girl, softly singing to her.
Jed looks down at her hands and sees his bruised knuckles, "Did I...did I kill her?" he whispers.
Dr. Saltzman leans down next to the boy, shaking his head, "No, no. You did not do this, okay? She's gonna be okay."
"How? She's dead." Jed says, raising his tone.
"We gave her some of Hope's blood." Dr. Saltzman says, trying to reassure him.
Jed shakes his head, "No! She doesn't want that! We talked all the time about what if we turned into hybrids and she hated the idea. She wanted a normal life as much as possible! She didn't want this!" he yells hysterically.
Tears start filling his eyes, "It was either this or she died. We had no choice," Kaleb chimes in, "What would you do?"
With that Jed stays quiet, pondering on the question. Save his best friend, but she's going to be the one thing she didn't want to be. Or let her die and live a whole life without her.
"C'mon Ben, please wake up. Please." Josie whispers as begins to sob, "Ben please stay for me. I'm not ready to say goodbye. Please."
At Jo's voice-breaking everyone seemed to have shed a few tears. Lizzie sits next to her sister, wrapping her arms around her shoulder. Her twin doesn't even look at her though, but still stares at Bentley. Tracing her fingers along her face.
"Do you hear that?" MG asks.
"It sounds like a heartbeat." Kaleb whispers back.
Bentley's eyes open looking at two girls, "B!" Lizzie yells.
An overwhelming amount of hunger filling her body. She gasps for breath looking between everyone in the room.
"Hey, hey, it's okay." Jo whispers, running her hands through her hair.
"Drink this." Hope says, handing her a little bit of her blood to complete the transformation.
"What is it?" Bentley asks, staring at Hope in fear.
"My blood, you need to drink it or in 24 hours you will die and this will all be for nothing." she says, sternly, desperately trying to save on her close friends now.
"I'm a hybrid?" she asks.
Hope doesn't say anything, so she turns to Josie. She knows Josie would never ever lie to her. All she does is nod.
"I don't want the blood." Bentley says, shaking her head, pushing the water bottle away.
"B-" Hope says, wide eyes.
"Bentley take the blood!" Lizzie yells.
"No, I don't want it!" she screams, "I don't want to be a hybrid. I don't want the blood."
"Girls, let's go back to the school and get Bentley in bed. If she doesn't want to take the blood, the best thing we can do is get her comfortable." Dr. Saltzman says.
Lizzie scoffs looking back at her father, "You're telling me we did all of this just to let her die?! Do you not remember how terrified you were when the nogitsune had a hold of her?"
"We need to respect her decisions." he says, sternly, but the look in his eye says that he's got something else planned.
MG and Kaleb look at Dr. Saltzman with a fearful look on their face. It's only been a little bit since she woke up, but you can tell that she's growing weaker. MG and Kaleb help Bentley up, wrapping her arms around each of their shoulders, walking her down to her car.
"Dad! You're gonna let my best friend commit transformation suicide?!" Lizzie screams, looking at her dad.
Both of the twins and Hope stayed behind to talk to him, "No of course not. We've got to convince her to stay. Bentley's stubborn, all of you should know that. We can't force feed it to her, she'll have to want to stay herself."
"How the hell are we gonna do that?" Hope asks.
"I don't know, but we have 24 hours to do it." he says, leaving the room.
The girls all give each other a look, before finally following suit. The boys have Bentley in the back seat. Her head lies on MG's lap while the bottom half is laying across Kaleb and Jed's.
Bentley is already looking ill, sweat beading on her forehead. Dr. Saltzman makes the drive back and once they get her they place her in her bed. Bentley didn't want to talk to anyone, she just laid in her bed, staring blankly.
"We'll give you some rest." MG whispers and Jed continues to look at her.
"Hey let's go." Kaleb says to Jed, on his way out the door.
Jed shakes his head, "No. I can't. If this is the last 24 hours with my best friend. I need to stay right here."
"Go to bed, Jed." she whispers to him.
"No let me-" he fires back.
"Jed! Go to bed!" Bentley finally yells, causing everyone to flinch.
"I'm sorry B." he whispers, before reluctantly leaving.
She didn't look at the girls who were still in their room. Bentley didn't bother telling them to leave, she knew they were too stubborn to actually listen. Josie curls up into the empty space next to her, but she just flips on her side not looking at the girl.
Lizzie and Hope took the bed on the other side of the room. None of the girls seemed to be able to sleep.They couldn't lose Bentley, they've all become a family and their family can't be broken. She could feel the life slowly start to fade away from her, growing weaker and weaker by the second.
The next morning the boys came back in with some of her favorite treats. If this was her last 24 hours they have to make them count. Kaleb had the Playstation in hand while MG brought his producing stuff.
Ben tries her best to sit up in the bed, but her arms become too frail that they just gave up from underneath her. Jo immediately lifts her up with all of her strength, so she can sit up, "Hey boys." she whispers, her voice quieter and more raspy than usual.
"Hey B. We got your favorite." Jed tries to say with excitement, but the guilt was eating him alive.
He tosses her a chocolate chip cookie as it lands into her lap. She picks up the cookie and her hand shakes. Just picking up the cookie was hard. She plops into her mouth savoring the deliciousness of the cookie, "Thanks."
"We also brought you zombies and Fortnite because we still need to beat our high score in zombies." Kaleb says, plugging it into the TV.
"And the song we wrote a few days ago, I couldn't sleep last night, so I finished editing it and it sounds amazing! You should hear it!" MG adds on, hoping that the song or music in general will want her to stay.
"You didn't have to do that MG." she says, but a small smile appears on her face.
He shrugs, "I know, but I wanted to."
The girls came onto Bentley's bed sitting on the foot, while the rest of the boys hopped onto that empty bed. Jo places her head on her shoulder and for the first time since Ben woke up she looks at her. She kissed the top of her head and Ben couldn't see it, but she had a wide smile on her face.
Jo looks back up at her with her award-winning smile and B smiles back, wrapping her arms around the smaller girl. Josie nestles her head into her chest, smiling at the warmth even though she was a little warm.
Bentley tries her best to keep up with the boys in their many, many hours of Fortnite and trying to beat the high score. But her body slowly grew weaker by the second. Unable to hold herself up or the controller anymore.
"Now get ready to hear 305, written and produced by Milton Greasley and Bentley Quinn." MG says, in a mocking award show host voice.
He presses play and my voice comes cutting in.
{Bentley}
It's 305, I'm on a roller coaster ride
Hoping you don't change your mind
I don't wanna let go, never been so sure in my life
Then the drums kick in and everyone's head starts bobbing along to the beat. Jo looks up at the girl with a small smile on her face.
"You wrote this about me?" she whispers.
"Of course I did...wait shit, I think I wrote it about this other beautiful brunette." she says, looking at the girl.
Josie slaps her arm with a smile on her face, "I hope not."
"Of course not." she replies, kissing her forehead with all of her strength.
{Bentley}
You're my sunlight on a rainy day
Would take my heart with you if you walked away
I'm a mess right now
I'm a wreck right now
I'm waiting for the moment that you let me down.
"This is so weird, it's like a happy beat, but sad lyrics. I know what it's like!" Kaleb says with a snap, "It's like Lizzie's life!" he jokes.
Lizzie looks at him with a death glare before doing a spell to throw him against the wall, "Haha very funny, asshole."
{Bentley}
If you cut the cord, I don't know what I'd do
Don't wanna skydive without a parachute
I'm a mess right now
Baby help me out
I'm scared I'm gonna wake up and you let me down
This feeling doesn't change no matter how hard that I try
I always think about you at the same time every night
"B, you're so smitten!" Jed exclaims and for the first time he's acting like himself since being possessed.
Bentley takes the pillow from behind her using all of her strength to hit him, "Shut up."
The bridge plays revealing my high note and everyone looks at her in shock. Mouth opens and eyes wide.
"That was no way it was you!" Hope exclaims.
"Why are you guys so shocked?" she says, laughing.
"Because that was amazing!!" Lizzie says.
The song ends and everyone claps, but Jed's face goes somber.
"You need to take the blood." he whispers.
Everyone's smiles slowly fall, "Jed-" Bentley starts to say.
"No, you have to take it. You can't die because of me." he says, tears filling his eyes.
"Jed, you didn't do this," she says, shaking her head, "This wasn't your fault."
"Yes it was. If I was just a little bit stronger, this wouldn't happen right now. But you need to take the blood B. You need to!" he gets up from the bed, "You're my best friend. The only people who actually didn't think of me as a douche. You can't die, but of course you're too fucking stubborn to listen. That all of us here are gonna be devastated if you die!"
Bentley shakes her head and looks at him, "You do not get to pull that card. My whole life I have been drowning in hating myself for turning! I never wanted to be a werewolf in the first place. Being a vampire, everything I wanted in life would be thrown out the window!"
"So you're just gonna leave us?" MG whispers, "You're not even going to try and stay."
MG arguing back took everyone by surprise. He never argues with anyone.
"MG, not you too." she whispers.
"Do you not know what you mean to us?" he asks, "Who's going to get Jed and Kaleb off my back when I mess up in zombies? Who's going to let me produce music? But fine if you want to just give up, be my guest."
MG and Jed leave the room, Kaleb's about to follow them, "I know this isn't what you wanted and I know we're selfish for asking, but how would you react if the one thing your best friend could take to stay alive they didn't take?" he says and with one look he leaves.
All of the girls go silent. A tense silence looming over it.
"Well there goes our fun plans." Bentley mumbles.
"They're right B." Hope whispers.
"No, don't go there. You've been sacrificing yourself since the first day I have ever met you." shes says, annoyed at all of them.
"You don't get it do you?" Lizzie asks, incredulously, "You're my best friend! My second sister! And you're just gonna die?" Leave the rest of us behind?!" she yells.
"Do you want to know why?" she asks, "Because when I died I saw my dad! My dad was there! I saw my baby sister Lizzie! My family is up there and what am I supposed to do huh? Live the rest of my immortal life not being to ever see my dad or sister when I die. Live the rest of my life watching your dad and Jed and Hope and you and Josie die! While I'm stuck in my body as a 17 year old!" Bentley finally snaps, worse than she ever has.
"What about us? You're gonna cut your life short when we can spend a possible hundred of more years together?" Lizzie asks.
"And what about what you said that day of our first meeting?" Hope chimes in, "We're a family and you don't want this family to be torn apart. My family died too B: my mom died because of me and my dad died because of me too. I came here and I was so cold to everyone, especially Lizzie and Jo. But then you came and you invited me to that party. Now I have a family. You dying is gonna tear everyone apart."
Bentley lets out a sigh, not wanting to look at anyone, "I can't do this right now." Josie says getting up from the spot she was curled up in, "I'm not gonna sit here for the last four hours of your life, watching you give up."
All of the girls look at her and leave her behind. Bentley rests her head against the wall, letting out a sigh. Bentley can feel her life slip away, all alone.
She didn't want an audience, but maybe if Jo was here it would be much more bearable. She grabs her phone from off the bedside table to look at the time: 6:27pm. About 3 more hours until it ends.
It's hard to focus, her body was heating up like a boiling pot of water. Literally like a boiling pot of water because of all the sweat that's dripping off her forehead.
There's a small knock on the door and Ben says weakly, "Come on in."
Penelope comes in and her eyes widen, "Wow you look like shit Quinn." she says.
She laughs at her snide remark before shooting one back, "Came to give me another spell-bound pen." she says, going into a coughing fit after they both share a laugh.
"Hey hey calm down. I don't want people to think I came in here and killed you." she says, genuine concern written on her face.
"What are you doing here Park?" she asks, trying to sit up, but Penelope rushes to her side and helps her up.
"I heard you're gonna be on your way in a couple hours. I didn't know you were dying." Penelope says, sitting next to her on the edge of the bed.
"I didn't think you'd care." Ben says with a shrug.
"You can't die." Penelope just comes out and says it.
Bentley rolls her eyes, "Not you too."
"Can you please just listen to me?" she asks and she shuts her lips tightly, "I was in love with Jo and I was such a bitch because I knew she deserved so much more than what the world would give to her. She deserved to have someone who would look at her like the whole world. She deserved to be happy. I thought she could have that with me."
She whispers, looking saddened, "But then I saw how she looked at you. And I knew and that's why I hated you so much because it killed me. Repeat this to anyone and I will set your hair on fire, but the way you two are and how happy she is. She needs that Quinn. She needs you. I know you don't want to stay here, but you need to stay for her."
Bentley shakes her head, "I won't be able to give her the life she wants. If I turn, I'll be more of a pain in the ass than I already am."
"Don't you get it? That doesn't matter to her. She likes you for you. The asshole parts of you and all. You dying is going to kill her." Penelope states, staring at her seriously, "And no matter how much I don't like you, I love her. And I love seeing her happy and you're the only one who can do that."
There was another knock on the door as Dr. Saltzman opens it, an envelope in his hand. He looks at the two of you with a surprised look on his face.
"I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" he asks.
Penelope shakes her head, "No I was just about to leave." he says turning to him, "If this is my last time talking to you, I'll see you later Quinn. Think about what I said."
Bentley grabs her wrist causing her to turn back away, "If this is my last time talking to you, take care of her for me, okay?"
"Always." she says with a smile, before walking away.
Dr. Saltzman comes over and sits where Penelope once was. He had a sad smile on his face and his eyes were a little red.
"Here to give me a speech too?" she asks and he laughs softly.
"No, I thought I would let the girls handle that." he says with a smile on his face.
"Are they okay?" Bentley asks, looking guilty.
He shakes his head, "No. Lizzie's crying into Hope's arms. Hope is staying strong like she always does, but I've known her for a long time. I know when she's trying not to cry. And Jo, she's-" he shakes his head again.
And that was enough of an answer for her to feel guilty, "I don't know what to do anymore. For more than half of my life I've lived in a world where no one would care if I died. I mean I was beaten to death more times than I could count. My mom wouldn't have cared, she would be too high to even remember me. But Dani, she was always there. She would never have been okay after that. So I stayed. I never felt like I mattered." she says tearing up, "Then I came here, I met your daughters, I met Jed, and MG and Kaleb. You took me in like I was one of your kids, it didn't matter what I did or who I was, all you cared about was taking care of me. And then Emma became like the mom I never had, it didn't matter if I never talked about my feelings she just listened. Now I have all of these people telling me that I need to stay, when I thought I would never have that."
"So what's stopping you?" he asks, his own eyes tearing.
"My dad, Danielle, I saw them Dr. S. And if I turn I'll never see them again." she responds, tears now leaving her face, "The family I always wanted to have to make sure that I could give my kids the childhood my dad gave me. But I won't be able to have that anymore."
Dr. Saltzman doesn't say anything, but gives me a letter. I look at it to see my dad's familiar handwriting. More tears fall onto my cheeks.
"Your dad wrote it before he disappeared and gave it to me to give it to you. For whenever you're facing a difficult situation, I didn't think I would have to give you it this soon, but I think now's a better time than ever." he says, letting out a soft chuckle.
Bentley opens it and skims the familiar handwriting:
My dearest Bentley,