𝕊𝕚𝕩𝕥𝕪 𝕋𝕨𝕠

Mulai dari awal
                                    

It honestly isn't odd that she's pent up in her room. She does this a lot actually, even after what happened. She likes reading in peace, which I understand.

I knock on the door, waiting patiently for her to answer. She doesn't, so I knock again. She doesn't answer again, and this time I twist the knob, slowly opening it.

Once it's fully opened I begin to walk in and suddenly she is waving at me frantically shouting, "mom, mom, don't! Don't move!" She holds her hand up, her eyes wide as she sits just beside the window, out of view from outside of it.

I furrow my eyebrows, my heart racing a thousand miles a minute. Jeez, she scared me. "What, what is it?" I question quickly, looking around her room.

I follow her eyes and her eyes are looking out her window, watching as if it's one of her favorite tv shows. I look out the window, I can't hardly see anything though. I'm just barely inside of her room, limiting my view out the window. But whatever she is looking at, it is in Cole's room.

Why is she being so sneaky? She doesn't even make a sign that she heard my question, so I step further inside of her room, just enough to shut the door behind me. Her eyes don't leave the window, her face blank but her eyes holding emotion. I'm not sure if she is sad or mad. "Emery?" I ask gently, lifting my eyebrows at her. I see her gulp.

I walk closer to the window, staying behind the wall, and soon I am at the side of the window, Emery on the other. I look out the window, glancing into Cole's window.

I see a man bent over a desk, his head down and his elbow twitching every once and a while. It's obvious he is writing something, or maybe drawing. "What is he doing?" I whisper, because even though he can't hear me, I still feel the need to be quiet.

"He's writing." Emery catches on to the whisper thing, her voice quiet and raspy— maybe even weak. I glance around his room.

To the left of the window you can see the end of his bed, there's a suitcase on top of it and clothes are scattered around the bed and on the drawer at the far right. The desk is against the back wall. "Does he write like your father?" I question, lifting my eyebrows as I now stare at Emery who is still watching Cole like a hawk.

"He writes songs." A small smile forms on her lips, a smile that I have never seen on her before. It's a content smile, happy and sad. Maybe a little mad? But when is she not— and I don't mean that rudely.

"Why don't you want him to see you?" I slowly crouch down onto my knees, cautiously. I don't want to blow her cover, she'd hate me even more if I did that. I would sit how she's sitting, her knees hugged to her chest and her chin placed on top, but my wound is stopping me.

She doesn't answer, she just keeps her eyes on the window as if her life depended on it. I, on the other hand, look at her tan fluffy carpet, pressing my hand down onto it to feel its fluff. It isn't that fluffy, more scratchy than anything. I'm not surprised, it's been here for over twenty years. "He's leaving." She whispers, tilting her head to the side.

I instantly glance up at her, furrowing my eyebrows. "Where is he going?" It didn't occur to me that the suitcase meant something. It was just something my brain didn't think about.

"Back to New Hampshire." She mutters, her eyes losing the small bit of happiness they had. I stay quiet, trying to think up the perfect thing. I know she likes him. I could see it the first time I saw them talking out of the window. A mom just senses those kinds of things. "He asked me to go with him."

I feel like someone knocks me in the chest at those words, I look at her shocked, and I'm pretty sure I even let out a gasp. "What'd you say?" I ask, my attention fully on her now.

"I said no, mom. Of course I said no." She rolls her eyes as if it's obvious and I shake my head. Why would she say no? I know, I'm supposed to be the person telling her she shouldn't go, telling her she has school and a life to live in New York, but what does she have here? She has her family, but soon she'll be moving away from us anyways.

I have never seen her so happy when she was with him. The way she lit up when he asked if she wanted any food. It was barely noticeable but I noticed. Like I said, mom's see those sorts of things. And I know that if it was me, and my mom, my mom would ground me just by thinking of going to New Hampshire with a guy. I'm not going to be that mother holding my child back from what she wants.

"Why would you say no?" I ask, my chest aching at the thought of her leaving. Maybe it isn't so bad she said no... I definitely don't want her going, because she's my daughter and I'll miss her, but I also want her to be happy.

Her eyes finally break from the window and she looks at me as if I have two heads. "Why? I'm seventeen... you got stabbed by the worst fucking piece of shit I know... I have school..." she trails off on each reason, trying to name them all.

"I'd be fine if you left. I have your father." I feel another blow to my chest. It pains me to say these words but I know it's the right thing. "And it's not like you can't transfer schools. And you basically live on your own anyways. Not to mention your birthday is in a month. You'll legally be able to live on your own." As I'm saying it, it gets easier and easier to name reasons, easier to tell them to her. "If it's really something you want, I'm not going to sit here and hold you back from it." I shrug my shoulders and I see her looking at me, but I think her mind is in a different place. However, I can tell she's listening. "And he's a good kid. When is his birthday?" I tilt my head.

"He turned seventeen last month." She replies dazed, taking in a deep breath. "What about dad? What is he going to do?"

"He has me." I lift my chin as if it's all that, but honestly I didn't think about it. He would hate it if she ran away to New Hampshire with a guy— especially Cole for some odd reason. "I don't think he'd be happy, but he will get over it. This is your life, your future."

She slouches, dropping her arms from around her knees and her eyes duck down to the carpet. "And what if..." she trails off, gulping down hard. "What if Cole doesn't want me anymore?"

I've never heard her sound so vulnerable, so emotional. I furrow my eyebrows at her, letting out a breath. "Then you stay here and get over it." It's probably not what she wants to here and I can tell because she flinches at my words. "You'll never know if you don't try."

She lets out a frustrated breath. "I can't do that. I can't leave here. It's better if I just stay and get over it."

I nod my head without hesitation, deciding it's best not to push her— I will gladly stop pushing her. I'd much rather her stay anyways. "Okay. It's your choice. I just want you to know that I'm not holding you back and neither should your father or Auden." I carefully push myself up from the floor, dusting off my hands.

I look out of the window one last time and I can see Cole look behind his shoulder, out the window for a small second before shaking his head and looking back down at his desk. "He still likes you, Emery. I can tell." I say softly, rubbing off my sweaty palms onto my leggings before cracking the door open.

Emery watches me as I exit her room. I can see a war going on behind her eyes. She is definitely giving this some thought. I don't cuss much so I am telling the truth when I say: fuck, it hurts. But I know it was the right thing to say. I just hope if she decides to go, she talks to Hardin first.

◉‿◉

𝙰𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚛'𝚜 𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎

I am so so sorry about the wait! Yesterday was very busy. How are you doing today?

Chapter sixty two: Mar. 24, 2021

Before It Ends • Hessa • Emery Scott Tempat cerita menjadi hidup. Temukan sekarang