Chapter 40

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That evening...
          The story cavorted elegantly around the room, quietly swaying along to the sound of the peaceful tune in my voice as I traced along the lines, following the words as they led me further. The cold tapping of Jug's finger on my stomach were the only things keeping me anchored into reality, preventing me from getting lost into the mysterious void that he'd taught me could be found rather interesting assuming you'd found a captivating tale.
          He hummed every few words, displaying his amusement with a sleepy smile. His eyes remained shut, sagging shut like the mop of damp hair atop his head that my free hand took refuge in. His flipped each page subconsciously whenever he'd noticed me pause, indicating I was ready to continue the journey.
          His fingers traveled further up my shirt, tracing around the outline of my stomach in circles, picking them up every few rounds and letting them fall into a skipping patters. Chills shuddered down my spine while very minuscule amounts of warm air escaped into my shirt through the opening his arm made.
          "Your hand is too cold, Juggie.", I announced. "I can't read you the story if you keep it up my shirt.".
          "Mmm," he moaned in response. "But I love your tummy. It's warm. It makes a nice pillow, too.". He lifted his head before letting it fall onto my stomach, pulling me down from my previous upright position against the headboard.
         "Now I get a pillow and I can still play with your tummy. See? No problems here.". He grinned wider, listing my shirt and pushing his face against my tummy before placing absentminded kisses onto it.
         "There is a problem though. Your fingers make it too cold, so please take it off for a second, okay. Here.". I took his hands in between mine, breathing hot air onto them and encapsulating them to warm them up.
         "Can I talk to you about something, Jug.".
         His eyes immediately shot open, meeting mine with concern.
          "Relax, my sweet boy. It's nothing serious. It's just something I want to get off my chest.".
          "Is it your shirt? Please tell me it's your shirt.".
          "Jug, later.".
          "Really?".
          "Maybe, you goof. I can tell you're trying to lighten the mood as well. Breathe. I'm fine.".
          His chest caved, relief visibly taking over. He sat up, scooting over to sit beside me against the headboard. Seemingly now wide awake, he took my shoulders and laid me onto his lap.
         "What's up, angel?".
         "I just thought that I should tell you... I remembered a happy memory.".
         His fingers now remained busy, twisting stray strands of my hair back and forth while he watched my face curiously, awaiting a change in expression or a signifier that I might've been shielding him from the truth.
          "I'm serious... There was one time when I was younger. It was right after my dad and sister... left. I remember feeling so alone and guilty, especially since my mom kept pushing the blame onto me. I would often run to the bathroom to throw up during school, and I would sit there until I had to go to the next class. None of the teachers ever asked questions because they knew about what happened. They probably assumed it would be better just to leave me alone.".
          "How is this a happy memory, Betty? This sounds terrible.".
          "You didn't let me finish.". I took a deep breath, reaching up and stoking his cheek just once before I allowed myself to continue.
          "One time, after I'd finished getting sick, I slumped against the stall and sobbed. This was a routine for me. But then... I remember, I heard someone skip into the bathroom. I stopped crying and quickly got up, standing on top of the toilet in hopes that they wouldn't notice I was there. To my dismay, at the time, they noticed.
          The girl, whoever she was, knocked on the stall door. I had to come out, seeing as she asked if I was okay. I opened the door, wiping down my cheeks and nodding, smiling assuringly and telling her that I just wasn't feeling very good. And then... she just hugged me. She didn't say a word. She pulled me in, rubbing my back before making her way into a stall after a moment. I never saw her again after that...".
          In that moment, Jug pulled me upright again and simply embraced me for a moment, placing his chin on my shoulder and rocking us subtly.
          "See? People do notice, Betty. They care. I guess... She really just knew how you felt and wanted to help. I'm sorry you never saw her again, but maybe that interaction is what helped you through the rest of school, even if only subconsciously.".
         His expression was so hopeful it made my heart twist, in both the best way and the worst.
         He refuses to let such things go unnoticed.
         "Honey, what's wrong? I know you've got something else going on in that head of yours. Don't lie.".
          "You're right.", I huffed, hugging his thigh and taking a whiff of his shirt.
          "You smell really good.".
          "I know. I did that on purpose. Now can you please tell me what's going on?".
          "Fine. I just feel awful about what happened earlier. I didn't mean to offend or trigger you in any way. I feel so guilty about hurting you. You can say that you weren't, but I could tell.".
          Jughead pulled himself out from under me gradually, placing me down onto the pillow and laying sideways next to me while he began slowly rubbing my temple.
         "Love, listen. Yes, what you said hurt, but only for a moment. You didn't mean it. You were just frustrated. I've gotten frustrated with you and said things I didn't mean, but you understood that because you know that I love you. Am I wrong?".
         I shook my head in response.
         "Exactly. And, full disclosure, I knew that's why you ran off. I knew that you weren't embarrassed, but you felt guilty. I didn't say anything because I knew you needed time to cook off about it and realize that you didn't do anything wrong. I also didn't want to push you too far.. You're human, remember? People make mistakes, but we love each other and can forgive those teeny tiny little mishaps.
          Do you understand?".
          "Yes, think so. Just... Thank you for being so patient and understanding.".
          "Of course, honey. That's how it should be. Now how about you turn around so I can give you a back rub while you fall asleep?".

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