ineffable husbands (oneshots)

Stereotypes

WORD COUNT: 1307

"Dinner?" Asked the demon.

"Sounds delightful, how about The Ritz?" Replied the Angel.

"Oh hell, why are you always in the mood for crepes?"

"Where would you like to go then? You despise eating." The angel smirked slightly.

"I don't despise eating." He mocked the angel. "I just dislike it." They walked to the Bentley together, the demon opening the door for the angel.

"Thank you, Crowley." He smiled softly and got in, closing the door nicely and buckling his seatbelt.

"Shut it, Azi." Azi, a shortened name for Aziraphale. He slid into his seat and slammed the door, not even bothering to put on his seatbelt on as he started the car and drove off.

It was towards the end of dinner and Aziraphale was just finishing off his dish as Crowley sipped his water, he wanted tea, but they only served it hot and he disliked warm drinks.

"I don't understand how you can dislike hot drinks, you are a demon after all." Aziraphale said as he took one last bite and dabbed his mouth with his grey napkin.
"Oh come on angel, I'm more than a stereotype." Crowley said back as he leaned his elbows on the table.

"Oh believe me I know that, I just expected you to like hot things based off of your personality."

"Well I like you." Crowley smirked to himself as he leaned on his hand.

"I- Thank you." Aziraphale blushed softly.

"Of course angel." Crowley took a sip of his water.
The waitress perked her head up.

"Oh I'm so sorry! If I had known you were a couple I would have brought out a nice candle." She sighed to herself.

"Oh it's ok we're not-" Aziraphale started.

"It's ok dear we're just about to leave anyways." Crowley cut him off and she walked away.

"Why would you say that? We're not romantically involved."

"It's easier then explaining our relationship." Crowley said as he shook his hand in a circular motion, making the drink in his palm swirl.

"Which is?" Aziraphale asked as he straightened out his bow tie.

"That we're a demon and angel fighting against god and satan?" He said like Aziraphale was an idiot.

"You could've just said we're friends." Aziraphale said, looking away from him.

"Aw, I'm your friend?"

"Of course you are. One of my best." He said as he smiled softly.

"Same to you." He tried his best to feel happy that they were friends, however all he wanted was for them to be more. "We should go." He stood up and pushed in his chair.

"I agree, would you like to get anything else while we're out and about?" Aziraphale smiled and stood up.

"Alcohol, lots of it."

~~~

The cookoo clock on the wall just went off 9 times and the pair were extraordinarily drunk. They both were sprawled out on the couch, Crowley had his head in Aziraphale's lap as the angel had his feet propped up against the coffee table.

"How do you feel about humans?" Crowley asked as he examined his wine.

"They're not that bad." The angel replied.