Beautiful Joy

5

" I'm sorry sir our policy states we cant-"

I cut her off running to my dads arms yelling "daddy"!

He smiles down at me "Hey sweetie you ready to go, where's Kate"

Kate step out from behind Ms. Beatrice, " My mom put him on my list" she says pointing at the paper 'Jacob Miles' is written in the box.

Ms. Beatrice huffs " I will allow it this time but seeing how you are not really her father, her mother needs to add you to the pick up list."

I can feel my dad stiffen but he just nods and we leave. The words she said lay heavy on my mind making me sad and quiet in the car. Kate can tell I'm upset and holds my hand in the backseat all the way to her house. When it is just me and dad in the car I pull my knees up to my chest and start to cry silently not paying attention until the car stops.

Dad opens the back door and slides in giving me a big hug. I go to him sitting on his lap and hugging him, mumbling fears into his shoulder: 'Why didn't he want me? Does he not love me? What if you leave? Do you love sissy more than me because she has your name? I wish I had the same name as you.'

Dad holds me till I cry it all out. After all my tears run dry, he tells me ice cream with extra sprinkles will make everything better. After we get our ice cream and sit down dad begins, "What she said is not true. We may have different last names but you are my daughter and I am your dad."

"As far as your other dad I don't know too much about him. I pity him because he doesn't get to see what an amazing girl you are. His loss is my gain. I couldn't imagine not having you as my daughter."

His words bring a small smile to my face and he lifts my chin. " Does that make me selfish that I want you as my daughter".

I shake my head, " No, because I want you as my dad. I wish you were my real dad".

" A last name does not make a dad; the time we spend together and the memories we make does. I don't feel any different about you than I do Faith." He pauses "....What does your necklace say".

With mention of the necklace my hand grabs the gold heart, but I don't have to read it to know what it says. "Always remember dad loves you" I smile because I know it's true, there is not a day that goes by that I question if my dad loves me.

Dad brings me back to the present,
"Everything with your mom was just so unexpected.....we haven't heard from him in 7 years.....we never thought...I'm getting another lawyer, a second opinion." He has his hands in his hair, causing his hair to look crazier than before.

His sequence of broken sentences make no sense and I am starting to worry about him. "Dad I don't understand. You have a lawyer, why? What does he want?"

"David is your legal guardian. The lawyer said I have no rights".

"Ok.... well I'm sure the lawyers can get it fixed and he can sign his rights to you. Yesterday was the first time I met the man..... your my dad."

Dad smiles but it looks more like a frown. "I wish it was that easy sweetie. He is the one pursuing for custody as your biological father. He wants you to move in with him. We have another meeting set up in a few day."

Shocked doesn't even begin to explain my thoughts and feeling. "But..."

"I'm sorry I lied to you about work yesterday but I was late because I had a meeting with him and my lawyer. It didn't go well. I stayed after the meeting looking for a new lawyer."

"What do you mean it didn't go well?" I ask hesitantly.

"Per the law, he is your father and has custody of you because your mother died. I have no right to keep you here."

I feel like a 100lbs is sitting on my chest. I can feel my eyes burning and a few tears run down my cheeks. My dad grabs me in a hug whispering that he loves me and we will work it all out.

We part when we hear someone walking our way. Jewel comes around the corner walking straight to dad and cuddling in his lap.
I don't want her to see me upset so I leave with the excuse of taking a shower.

As I'm showering it occurs to me that yesterday was no coincidence: Meeting at the mall, him finding my phone and coming to the house to return it.

Kate barges into the restroom. We only have one bathroom and Kate is not shy at all, doing her business as I'm in the shower. She stays and talks to me about my birthday plans, her energetic chatter is a welcomed distraction.

When it's time for me to get dress she turns to face the door, still going on about her plans for my birthday.

At some point she must have asked me a question, because she turn to face me "Are you listening". When she looks at me I can't hold them back any longer, an ugly cry rocks thru my body as tears flood down my face. Without any explanation Kate wraps her arms around me and we slide to the floor. Laying in my friends arms on the bathroom floor everything seems overwhelming: I miss my mom, I'm nervous about school, and now David. She lets me cry for awhile, waiting till the sobs and tears stop. I feel numb, tired, and dried up.

"Joy is this about your mom?" If I was upsetting you trying to plan your party, I'm sorry. I know that was her thing."

I shake my head and then begin to fill her in on everything dad told me this morning. She is as shocked and upset as I am and we cry together for some time before we hear a knock on the door.

"I know girls take awhile but come on, boys gotta go too" Max yells through the door.

I feel bad because we have hogged the bathroom for over an hour. "Take it outside buddy.... I mean it we have lady problems in here. Don't make me go into details because I will", Kate threatens.

I can hear grumbling as Max walks away. Kate gives me a wide smile in victory, "gets him every time. Last week he was hogging the bathroom, finally I sweetly told him I would use mom and dads but I needed him to hand me a tampon first. He shot outta there in .3 seconds."  We both laugh and at that moment I'm so thankful for Kate and her quirky personality.

"I think I'm gonna lay back down, all the crying is exhausting" I say.

Kate hugs me one last time and we say our 'see ya laters'. Tonight is family dinner and Kate's family always comes over.

I'm so emotionally exhausted I'm asleep as soon as I lay down.

I'm awaken 2 hours later by Faith and Jewel jumping on my bed chanting together, "wake up, wake up".

After recovering from my active alarm clocks I wrestled them down and tickle them til they are both yelling mercy. I see something in the corner of my eye and turn to see dad looking much better and smiling at us.

"Ok girls family fun day in celebration of 'Our Joy' turning 15! Your pick Joy what will we be doing today?"

Today is family day, and after losing mom I truly treasure each day with my family. Deciding then I'm not going to let some man I don't know ruin it. I smile at my dad and sisters before answering "Pizza.....putt putt and arcade ......book store".

After the decision is made we all get ready as fast as we can and head out the door excited for a fun day together.