BNHA/MHA Oneshots

|~|Imaginary!MHA Character x PANICKED!Reader|~|

/Title/
❌PANIC ROOM❌

|Disclaimer|
EXTREME PANIC ATTACK AND SELF HARM, MENTAL BREAKDOWN, EMOTIONAL NUMBNESS, MENTIONS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND ABANDONMENT

CONTAINS SOME OF MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCES

❗️THIS IS A VENT-SHOT ❗️
{Might delete}

\Requested By\
N/A

Don't ask for requests, I have three left to do then it's February.

|POV|
Reader

Reality hurts, physically. Not only physically, but mentally, emotionally, internally. Reality feels fake sometimes, the fictional world the reality you wanted.

You gulped, shaking violently in your room alone. You didn't know what to do, what to feel, how to react. Reality was nothing, reality was monstrous. Reality was a living nightmare-you wanted it to stop.

The new place, so far from your friends. A place where everyone stared at you, from how you dress to how you talk. A place where no one wants to know you, a place where you are the alien, the imposter. This was your reality.

You shook, the mattress beneath you shaking with. You held your device up, reading the words across the screen to calm yourself. Reading about your favorite character, thinking about how great, how amazing, it would be for them to be real.

Oh, how you begged to be left in their world, with them, and leave this fake reality behind. Leave the trauma you've seen, leave the toxicity, leave the drama.

You inhaled unintentionally, the breath quick, as you tried to keep from sobbing. It was starting to get harder and harder to see the words you read on the lot screen, harder to focus. You choked on your tears, trying to be quiet. You wiped your eyes and continued to read.

Oh, how they would hold you if they were real, how they would talk to you and light up your life. How they would cheer you up when you're sad, make sure you're okay.

Make sure you didn't loose your mind.

You coughed out a meek laugh, a smile forced on your face. That's it, you were loosing it. Loosing your mind, your sanity. All because you were alone. Because you loved another reality, not your filthy one.

The tears meekly rolled down your cheeks as you continued to read the words from the screen. You laughed out a little again, finding it funny that you were still reading the fanfiction of your favorite character being with you.

You dropped it onto the bed, your hand still high. Your mind was facing, panicking. Your heart was pounding, pounding, pounding. Your body kept shaking, and shaking, and shaking.

"I'm alone," you choked out, the words softer than a whisper. The salty liquid fell into your mouth, your face falling from your smile to a face of absolute terror. "I'm... I'm alone."

It seemed to hit you harder than before. You knew it already, so why did it hurt so much? The reality you were in hated you, but the fictional world would love you.

You slumped back, your head hitting the wall behind you. You didn't care, you just laid there. The {metal/wood} beside your bed caught your attention. Suddenly, you felt nothing emotionally.

Maybe this was a dream? Maybe, just maybe, this wasn't the real reality? What if this was fake, all of it?

Why else would your mother be beaten, over and over and over again by your father? Why else would he leave you, never caring about your existence? Why else would he choose himself over his family? Wasn't a parent's job to love their children? Maybe this was all a game, and it was just a little bug in the system.

Your mind went blank, staring at the hard piece of solid, touchable, eye-candy thing beside you? It was calling for you.

You didn't even register what you did until the pain went through your entire body. One quick, hard hit of your head on it. You froze, as if trying to process what you had just done.

That hurt.

You stayed there for a second, though your body took control. Your head lifted again, slamming onto the object even harder.

More.

You lifted your head, ignoring the dizziness. You slammed your head back, this time a cough forcing its way out of you. Though that didn't stop you.

Up, down, pause. Up, down, pause. Faster. UP, down, pause. UP, DOWN, pause. Not fast enough, not hard enough. UP, DOWN, PAUSE. UP, DOWN, PAUSE.

The tears were falling, though you couldn't tell if it was from all of your emotionless feelings, or the pain.

Keep going. Don't stop. Harder.

You gasped, coughing again after not realizing you had been holding your breath. You then began to ball your fists up and hit the sides of your head, trying not to throw yourself into the wall.

THEY HATE YOU. YOU'RE NOT REAL. THEY ARE NOT REAL. NOTHING IS REAL. WAKE UP. WAKE THE HELL UP. STOP GOING EASY, WAKE UP! DO IT!

You coughed out heavily, breathing becoming a challenge. You rammed yourself into the object beside you, stumbling. You then did it again, then again.

Though the fourth time you fell, quiet. You laid on the mattress, tears falling down your face. Your body was throbbing, your head mainly. Though you couldn't move, your eyes blankly staring ahead of you.

Were you dead? Dying? You didn't know, but the pounding was seen in your eyes. He darkness was pounding into your sight, in rhythm with the pounding of your heart and head. So tired, so drained.

You slowly closed your eyes, coughing out another breath. Then you fell unconscious, almost immediately after you closed your eyes.

You weren't dying. You weren't in a false world. This was reality. You had to stay here. You couldn't escape.

I couldn't escape.

~~~

Word Count:
955

Artist Credit:
J T on Pinterest.Com

Music Credit:
N/A

Published On:
January 15, 2021

When I'm in this state, I tend to ram my head into metal or wood. I did it into cement more when I was little. I have several dents and scars on my head, but it's hidden in my hair. I have several.

I want no pity, I just wanted to vent through a story to cope. I love you all. ♥️✨