Ahsoka, Daughter of the Light (Book 5): Rescue

Chapter 18: Explaining Everything

AHSOKA TANO-BONTERI

Ahsoka and Lux ran with Luminara down the alleyway, where Luminara lead them to a door. She opened it, and brought the two inside.

"I can't say I expected you to come for me," Luminara said, closing the door. "We Jedi need to stay further apart nowadays, lest we attract any unwanted attention. Unless I have already done so, and that's why you're here. Also, I think it goes without saying that I'm curious as to what Senator Bonteri is doing here. Didn't you die in a shuttle crash?"

"I'm standing right here," Lux replied, "So the answer is no, I am, in fact, not dead."

"Still," Luminara continued, "that doesn't really explain why he's here with you, and not back in the Imperial Sena-"

Luminara's eyes was suddenly drawn to Lux's belt. Ahsoka realized she must have seen his lightsaber.

"Why do you have that?" Luminara asked, looking at the saber. 

Lux was quick to cover it up with his robe.

"You... you're a Jedi?" She continued.

"Listen," Ahsoka interrupted them, "I have a lot to explain. And you may not exactly like some of it."

"Well," Luminara said, "You likely have more answers than I have questions, so go on."

"Okay," Ahsoka said, taking a breath. "Lux and I, well... we're..."

"In love?" Luminara finished her sentence.

"Yeah," Ahsoka said. "I... I broke the code. Kind of. But technically I also didn't, but let me get to that."

Luminara seemed confused, for obvious reasons.

"After I left the Order," she continued, "I made my way over to Onderon to return to Lux. I had already fallen for him on my extended mission to Onderon, so it was the only logical choice for me to go back there. While I was there, I... well, I did a number of things, including fighting off Separatists and stealing Grievous's ship. But then, I started to have these... visions. Visions of the Temple being attacked, but I didn't know who was attacking it. So, Lux and I went over there, and we faked a shuttle crash to cover our tracks. That's why he's presumed dead."

Ahsoka paused for a moment. A tear began to roll down her eye as she recalled what had happened at the temple.

"Then..." she said, beginning to tear up. "Well, I doubt you don't know this, but it was the clones that attacked the Temple. That's when I went in. I sent the message, and I saved as many people in there as I could, and directed them all to a ship. And then..."

She paused again.

"Continue," Luminara said.

"...It's him," she said, holding back tears like she did every time she thought of her former master. "Anakin. He... he betrayed us, turned to the Dark side, joined Sidious..."

Luminara gasped.

"Oh... that... that must have been so hard on you," she said. "I... I'm so sorry."

"No," Ahsoka replied, "there's nothing to be sorry for."

"No," Luminara continued, "I'm so sorry for how I treated you, and for how I treated everyone. I... I almost left you and Barriss for dead on Geonosis, and when the council was making all these accusations, I chose to believe it, just because it was the easiest thing to do. I'm sorry."

"T-thanks," Ahsoka replied. "It... it helps a lot."

"Anyways," Lux continued for her, "we escaped the Temple and we've established a community of Jedi Survivors in the unknown regions. That's why we came here. We want you to come with us."

Luminara fell silent.

"I can understand if you don't want to come," Ahsoka replied.

"No," Luminara said, "I'll... I'll come. It most be far to stressful for you alone to manage a Jedi Order. I take it you're the one in charge, right?"

"Yes," Ahsoka said. "We... I've made some reforms, though. I've allowed for attachment, since Lux was probably the sole reason Anakin wasn't able to get to me. I've just had to teach that you have to let go in order to not get overcome by a desire for revenge. I... I don't really even know if it was the right choice."

"I have faith in you and your Jedi," Luminara said. "Even if I don't agree with some of the things you might be doing."

"Thanks," Ahsoka said.

"Now," Luminara asked, "Might I ask how you came to find out Lux was force-sensitive?"

And that hit her like a knife to her chest. She remembered that mission to Onderon, where Lux had unleashed the force to save her from Barriss, the very reason she was so deternined to come here and rescue Luminara in the first place.

But should she know? Does she even want to know?

She has to know, Ahsoka thought. She has to know what happened to her Padawan.

"Well," Ahsoka said, "after the whole debacle at the temple, we... we had to go back to Onderon to rescue Saw Gerrera from Imperial captivity. We knew it was probably a trap, but we wnt anyways. But the one who set the trap..."

She paused, knowing how much pain this would bring to Luminara.

"B-Barriss," she said. "T-they got to Barriss. She serves the Empire now."

"W-what!?" Luminara said, "No, no no no no no..."

"It's true," Ahsoka said. "and I don't like it any more than you do. It was her that forced Lux into using the Force to save me."

"N-no," Luminara panicked. "I... I failed her, I failed her, I failed you, and now I've failed her..."

She began to cry.

Normally, it would have been an odd thing for Jedi to do this. Normally they'd be forced to keep their feelings to themselves, but that only let all the pain build up. Nobody would ever know, and nobody would be able to help. And these feelings may, over time, build up into a feeling for revenge, bent and twisted by years of being masked.

But not anymore. Now, the Jedi could spill out their feelings all they wanted, at least with the right people. But those were the people that could help them. The people who could lend them a hand, and be there for them when they needed them the most.

And that was okay.