Grace (English Version)

Chapter 14

Of course you can mentally adjust to what it feels like to sleep out your drunkness. The head seems to burst, every sound has the intensity of a steam ram and you have the feeling of having a dead animal in your mouth. Nevertheless, it is a pain to actually experience the whole thing. As soon as I woke up all of these symptoms fell on me and my stomach turnes. I need one hour to get ready to get up and change, which takes almost half an hour. I just leave yesterdays things on the floor. I lack the strength to sort them and put them away. After vomiting in the toilet bowl, I take a long, hot shower, which I normally hate to get my circulation going a little, then go downstairs and have breakfast. The others have long been finished and have devoted themselves to other activities. While I have a cup of tea, my father comes into the kitchen. He sees my condition and stops.

"So, what do you look like?"

"I don't think so great."

"Are you sick or something? Are you feeling good?"

"Both times No."

"How am I to understand that?"

"I'm not sick, but I still feel bad."

"What were you doing last night?"

"I was out with friends."

"Listen, I don't want you to ..."

"No, I have no plans to become an alcoholic! I was only on the road with my friends and we drank beer. But my health is too precious for a constant drunkenness. It is exactly the same with my friends."

"It's good. I just wanted to have said it."

"I just think it's always a little overreacted when you're portrayed as an alcoholic right after the first party just because you've drunk much for the first time. If I do that more often, you can talk to me again."

A bold statement to my parents. It is questionable whether I would let my children endure such a thing. However, my father says nothing and only nods before leaving the kitchen.

Sure, the meeting last night was fun. I found it really entertaining and educational to sit in the park with the others and share a crate of beer. Nevertheless, I have little desire to let myself get drunk at every opportunity I have, and then end up in the hospital under a car or with liver-cirrhosis. I think the same way about the other guys. Sure, they also gobbled a lot and secretly let high-proof things with them from the kitchen cupboard, but unlike some other students at our school, their health is just as important to them as it is to me.

With another tea, my cell phone and a book, I sit on my windowsill. My nose hurts a little bit from my fall yesterday, but nothing seems to be broken. The only thing that is scratched is my health - this headache is killing me - and my pride. I was drunk trying to have a serious conversation with Grace. In retrospect, an incredibly embarrassing situation. I'll wait if she calls again and if not then I'll do it. We finally have to talk to each other, it can not go on like this. Ludwig was right about what he said. I won't meet someone like Grace a second time. She is a really extraordinary and special person and I cannot just give her up like that.

My watch shows me almost two-thirty p.m. and Grace still hasn't called. Apparently she is busy elsewhere or has simply forgotten about it. Thanks to a little nap, my headache got a lot better and I actually managed to do some schoolwork. I call Grace but only her mailbox answers. I leave her a message to please call back. When she still hasn't called at eight, I tell her we'll be talking to school tomorrow. Before I go to bed I pull out some photos. They are from Grace and me. For some reason I had printed them out and put them in a folder where I still keep it. I put it in my schoolbag. Maybe I'll need it tomorrow.