Chapter 3: Niall
I couldn’t stop thinking about Jen. Her long curls and her sweet voice were the only things on my mind. I wanted to hear her say my name, is that weird? Probably, but I’m weird as shit so whatever. I shouldn’t be thinking about her the way I am, how I want to pick her up and push her up against the wall and just kiss her for the rest of my life. I have a girlfriend. Camila. But Jen. She’s so down to earth, beautiful, kind. If I ended things with Camila everyone would go crazy. I just can’t. My parents, her parents, HER, the magazines, the boys, everyone would go crazy.
“Vvvvv… Vvvvv… Vvvv… Vvvv” my phone started to vibrate and I shot up to see who it was. Of course, it’s Camila. What does she want?
“Niall? Where have you been? I’ve been waiting for you for over half an hour!” Camilia screamed into the phone. Shit. Holy shit. I had to go help her with some charity thing. She says she cares about this, but I think she just wants the publicity.
“Oh god, I’m sorry babe. Let me grab my shoes and I’ll be right there.” I said trying to calm her down, I couldn’t take her freaking out on me.
I rushed down to wherever the hell she told me to come and there she was staring at me with shame. Okay I was thirty minutes late, sue me. I helped her with whatever she needed help with, kissed her cheek, and lied.
“I’m going to go hang out with Harry and Josh. Do you mind?” I told her. It wasn’t a lie.. okay it was a lie. But I wanted to see Jen and like I could tell her. I wasn’t gonna cheat on her, no way, I just needed to see Jen. We had this connection that I can’t even describe.
“I thought we were going to go to the theatre and watch a movie? I already called Zayn and Elle.”
“Tell them I can’t go, and I’m really sorry. Love you babe, see you later.” I said as I kissed her cheek and ran off.
As soon as I got home I got my phone out and sat on my bed. “You can do this. It’s just a girl. A girl that you can’t have anything with. You just want to hang out.” I said to myself. Finally I got the balls to call Jen and ask her to hang out. She sounded very timid and shy at the idea of her coming over alone to my apartment, but I think she was up to it because thirty minutes later I hear a knock on the door. There she was.
“Hi stranger!” I said with a huge grin that I just couldn’t keep from having when I was with her.
“Hello!” She cheerfully replied. We were having a little game going, I could tell. So I bowed to her and said, “Would you like a cup of tea miss?”
“Why I’d love one!” She said matching my tone of voice. We made our way to the kitchen and we just talked about everything. It wasn’t anything mushy or deep, but it was everything. I’d hung out with this girl once, and I felt more comfortable with her than anyone in my entire life.
Before we knew it, it was 11 o’clock PM. As I was walking her to the door she smiled at me and said, “I had a really nice time tonight.”
“Me too.” I replied. She waved at me and started walking out the door. I don’t really know why, I guess I just couldn’t control myself anymore, I had been staring at her in those tight pants for too long, but I grabbed her waist and pulled her in. I thought this would’ve been easier. Well I guess I didn’t really think at all. There we were, face to face. Her soft, pale lips inches from mine. She just stared at me with her big eyes. Shit, I couldn’t take this. I grabbed the back of her neck and pushed her lips against mine. There was no tongue or anything, just lip to lip. We pulled back and just stared at her. Damn, I totally just screwed this up, with everyone. She must really respect my girlfriend, too bad I don’t.
I thought everyone was wrong, but no. She stared at me for a good five seconds and then pressed her lips against mine, again, only this time it was so much more intense. She opened her lips and our heavy breath mingled together. This was a kiss alright. I’ve never felt anything so amazing. I grabbed her upper thigh and pulled her up so that I was holding her. Her smooth legs, wrapped around my waist. I pushed her up and kissed up and down her long neck. She let out a soft moan and I turned around and threw her on the couch. Before I knew it, I was on top of her, she was below me, as we continued to quickly explore each other and make out. Our tongues collided and she felt better than I ever imagined. I reached underneath her and lifted her up by the small of her back. Our bodies were so close, our kisses were so warm, and I wanted this girl in my arms forever.
She stopped kissing and I pulled back. Her face was as pale as a ghost. She turned her head and saw a picture of Camila and I and slid from underneath me and grabbed her jacket. I grabbed her hand to stop her but she got away. I thought she was going to storm out and never talk to me again, but she didn’t.
“How could you do this to me? We both know good and well that we can’t be together. You know that. Why would you lead me on like this? And do that? Why?” Tears started to escape her glassy eyes. “I can’t do this. You’re not going to do this. Are you?”
“I don’t think I can do this without you, do life.” I said, in a husky tone. How could I like this girl so much, I met her 3 days ago. THREE.
“How many times have you used that one?” She didn’t believe me.
“Look Jen. I want you. You and me. Not me and Camila. It’s complicated okay.”
“What’s so complicated?”
“You don’t underst-”
“Then explain it to me!”
“I can’t end things with her. Not because I love her, or even that I want her. It’s because everyone would go insane. Zayn and Elle have been together for two years. Harry and Cali have been together for 7 months. I can’t just break up with her, everyone would freak out. But I want you, I need you. I want you to want me too. I’m sorry I pulled you into this. I didn’t expect to feel this way about a girl this quickly. I just wanted to apologize for spilling coffee on you. You were so beautiful, you are so beautiful.”
She smiled at me. I think I said something right.
“Listen,” I continued, “I want too see you. I really fucking wanna see you. Can I keep seeing you? Please. Please Jen.”
“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
And she was gone. Just like that. I don’t know what just happened, or how to comprehend it, but this girl was worth it. Here goes nothing. God, I’m an idiot.
