Shadowsinger

Chapter Sixteen-Grief Counseling

Cassian meant it when he said we'd be flying hard and fast. All those extra hours of training by myself and with Azriel are called in as we fly north towards the far Night Court. Cassian leads at the head while Az and I bring up the back to make sure no one is left behind. Luckily, there are enough strong High fae that winnow us all to the Dawn Court which cuts our journey in half. It takes the entire day to reach the southern border of the Night Court and I hang back watching as Cassian commands the troops with Azriel at his side. I take note of how Cassian stands, how he holds his wings, the tone he uses when he speaks, and tuck each scrap of information away for later. I know I'll need it.

I see the way they all look at the two of them with a mixture of disgust and awe. Bastard born Illyrians that somehow gained more power than any other in history along with being friends and part of the court of their High Lord. Many eyes wander to me as well, one of the rare female almost Illyrian soldier here, but usually look away before Cass or Az can snarl at them. I let them defend me. It'll be better if I remain a mysterious figure until it counts. However, the sheer volume of male eyes on me makes my palms sweat no matter how well I keep up my mask of cold indifference. I've no doubt it'll be harder in the Steppes if we make it there after the war with most of these males.

Cassian and Azriel make our camp in the midst of everyone on elevated ground which would give us an advantage in battle, but also makes us easy to see. Even as I finally bathe within the privacy of the tent, both males pacing outside, I can feel eyes roving over the tent. "Best get used to it." Cassian says when he catches me scanning the tents around us afterward for the fifth time within a minute. "While being rare, you're also astoundingly beautiful, so expect a lot of attention from everyone."

"Your assurance warms my heart, Cassian." I deadpan and he grins while toweling dry his hair from his own bath. Azriel is taking his turn now even though it took nearly an hour of arguing to get him to leave my side. A fact that secretly warms my heart. It does feel incredible to be clean again, but it hadn't deterred the stares. The opposite, actually. "I wonder if it would help if I had my shadows turn into their greatest fear, then wander freely through the camp." A few eyes leave me and I smirk at the fact.

"Not that I'm against seeing my army shit their pants, but remember what they've gone through. Remember what they've lost." The ire gathering in my gut fades at that and I nod while looking back to the fire in front of us. "I recommend that you tread carefully as advisor. Illyrians have twisted views on females." He suggests and his tone is kept purposefully low.

"Why do you think I was watching you and Azriel today from the shadows? You're not that pretty." He frowns and I press my lips together to keep from grinning. "I'm aware." My reading about Illyrians back in Velaris had finally become useful given my new title. While their attitude towards females may have slightly improved since the histories I was getting into, it's not by much. Cassian hums in acceptance and something like approval shimmers in his eyes before he jerks his chin to the tent.

"I'll bet he's out of the bath within the next two minutes." Cass teases and my eyes lift to find him shaking his head at the tent beside us. My shadows whisper to me and my smirk grows.

"I'd bet the next minute." I return and no more than ten seconds later, Azriel walks out of the tent with eyes sweeping the area before they land on me. I hum a soft laugh and catch the small parcel of coins that Cassian chucks at me with a sour look. Az, however, looks less than amused with us and his eyes hold the same worry that they did when Rhys gave me my position.

"I'll be fine. Cassian won't let a thing happen to me and besides, I won't let a thing happen to me either." I assure him across the bond with a soft nudge as he settles close to my side with our wings bumping together. He doesn't look towards me but towards Cassian.