Healing Myself

Meeting the girls

We reach Lake's apartment building, getting out of the taxi and paying for the ride and go on our way upstairs. She lives on the second floor, and the building is a little old-fashioned so it doesn't have a lift. As we reach her door, she rings the bell and the both of us wait outside for Carla to open the door. We don't have to wait long as just a few moments later, there she is, standing in the open doorway with her light brown, almost blonde hair piled on top of her head in a messy bun, her light brown eyes shining brightly. She's wearing a light blue top and a pair of white jean shorts.

"Great!", she says, clapping her hands, "You guys are here right on time. Danny and Karen are already inside sucking faces." Carla insists on calling Danielle 'Danny' because it pisses her off. They've argued over it about a thousand times, but it's clear it's just for fun. They're both the girly girls out of us, so they get along well.

We follow Carla inside, and immediately the scent of spicy pork and garlic hits me. I take a long inhale, savouring the scent before saying, "It smells delicious in here."

Carla looks at me and smiles. "Thanks. I've made pork sliders."

"Are we just going to smell the food or actually eat it?" Lake, of course.

Carla frowns a little and answers her, "It's not 1:00 yet, and I'm sure you had a late breakfast, didn't you?"

"I did", Lake mumbles and heads inside. Carla shakes her head and goes in as I look around a little, seeing a plate of hooks for keys hung on one of the walls. It wasn't there before, but it makes the hallway look neater, as earlier Lake used to just strew around the keys wherever she liked.

I walk in the living room and see Danielle and Karen who are sitting on the couch together. I greet them. "Hey guys", my voice sounds a little tight to me, and I wonder why that is. Karen smiles at me, "Sang", she says, her brown eyes warm like they always are, though a little shadowed. Her black hair that was in a pixie cut the last time I saw her look a tad longer and she's swept them off to one side. She is wearing her usual cut sleeve top and a pair of black jeans. Her and Lake could almost be mistook for sisters, they are that much alike in their looks and personality.

"Hey Sang!" Danielle says enthusiastically and does the air kisses thing on both of my cheeks. She looks exactly how she's always looked. Wearing a scoop neck top and skinny jeans, her plain brown hair in a bob, accenting her angular chin, and bangs at the front that cover her 'mile-long forehead', at least that's what she calls it. She's always had a problem with how broad her forehead is, so two years back she decided to get a fringe to cover it up. She's had it ever since. Her brown-blue eyes are lined with a perfectly winged stroke of black eyeliner, bringing attention to the odd mix of colors. It also brings my attention, however, to the dark circles beneath her eyes that she's covered perfectly with some concealer. They looked fainter than before, her eyes a little less sad, but it was still there.

I wouldn't have known they were there in the first place, had I not known what I did. What had happened 3 months ago had hit her really badly. She hadn't been all that close to Dylan, even though all of us were neighbours as we lived on the same street, but it had been her eighteenth birthday that day, and she felt partly responsible for what had happened. I willed the thoughts of the past away and focused on the now instead, giving her gesture back.

As I sat down on the love seat adjacent to the couch, Danielle asked me, "How have you been?"

My throat closed up. It was such a simple question for one friend to ask another, but I could hear it in her tone, exactly what she wanted to know from me. "I've seen better days", I told her. It wasn't a lie, I had seen better days, I just didn't know how to put into words what I was going through at the moment. Up until an hour ago, I was laughing with strangers, and now I was afraid to speak to people I had known for years. I knew the why, though. All the boys I had met today didn't know what had happened to me, they just saw me as another girl, a person they could be friends with.

A normal, happy person with a normal, happy life just like theirs. I wasn't normal though, or at least I didn't have a very happy life, not at the moment, and this group of girls knew that firsthand.

•••••

QOTD: Do you guys have a friend gang too? I'm really too anti-social to have one and don't see that changing anytime soon. Anyway, have a great weekend!