Chapter 20

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I say so many goodbyes and thank so many people that I could barely even remember leaving the awards. I finally take a breath out once I get in the limo to take us back to the palace.

"You did really good tonight Violet." Miles says with a smile but something seemed forced but I didn't ask why.

"Thanks." I say and look down at my award. I was proud of it and I'd finally realized I was doing good with my life.

Not long into the car ride in the busy traffic I lay my head on Miles's shoulder and we don't say anything until we get back to the palace. I thought about how we kissed and I didn't want to ask what it meant so I didn't.

When we get back he helps me out of the car and walks me in the night into the palace and up to my room.

"Goodnight, Violet." He says softly and holds onto one of my hands.

"Goodnight." I say even softer, not really wanting to go but also not knowing what else to say. "I'll see you at breakfast."

"It's late, you can skip breakfast if you'd like." He says with a smile. I always liked sleeping in so I nodded and didn't complain.

"Thank you." I say as I walk into my room and watch the prince walk away. I was confused by the events of today but nevertheless I begin to get ready for bed. I walk to my window to close the curtains so the light wouldn't wake me in the morning and I hear a knock at my door.

I turn and go open it without hesitation. Miles stands there still in his tux.

"Hey." I say with a smile.

"Would you mind walking down to the gardens with me for a moment?" He asks me. I was still in my dress so I didn't mind and I let him connect our arms and walk me quietly down into the gardens. We walk for a few minutes in silence and then he stops and looks at me.

"Is everything alright?" I ask.

"Do you still love Dylan?" Miles asks softly. He had the same sad look in his eyes that he had during the awards. "You looked so hurt tonight and if you were over him I don't think it would cause you as much pain."

"I've been thinking a lot about it trying to figure out what love is and I can't manage to get any answers." I pause because I didn't know how much I actually wanted to tell Miles. "My mother never told me she loved me, not off camera anyway. Dylan was the only person to ever say he loved me so when I realized he didn't anymore I still sought his affection because I wanted to know I was able to be loved."

We both sit on a concrete bench and I wait a moment before continuing.

"A part of me held onto the hope that maybe he did still love me and even if we weren't together it would still mean something but I realized tonight he never did. I guess that's why he's such a good actor." I shrug slightly.

The prince still doesn't say anything so I kept going.

"I thought I loved him before but I don't really think I know what that is yet so I don't love him now. I think I loved the affection and the escape, not him." I say honestly.

"Was the only reason we kissed tonight because of the cameras and Dylan?" He asks after a moment. I sit there and think for a moment. "Look Violet, I'm becoming rather fond of you and I want to know where we are at."

"I don't know it just happened." I say softly, very unsure. "I don't think it was just because of cameras though."

"Are you sure about that, Violet?" Miles asks me, not in a rude way but as if he wasn't sure if I knew for sure myself.

I didn't know how to say yes in a convincing way but I look at his face for a moment and then lean closer to him and kiss him quickly and pull away to see his reaction.

"I'm sure." I tell him quietly. I didn't know how he would respond at first but he pulls me a bit closer to him and puts his hand on the back of my neck and kisses me slower this time, pulling us closer together until we pull apart.

I didn't know why but I got a sudden urge to hug him, so I put my arms around him and he pulled me into his chest.

"You are lovable Violet." Mikes says quietly as I lay my head against his chest. "You just haven't been around loving people and that's not your fault."

"How would you know that?" I ask him softly.

"I'm always right." He says jokingly and I chuckle slightly.

"Thank you for today. It's been the nicest thing anyone's done for me as long as I can remember." I say quietly.

"You deserved it." I look at him and he's smiling softly at me and I just let him hold me for a bit longer before he walks me up to my room.

He holds onto one of my hands and brings it to his mouth and kisses my hand softly.

"Goodnight, love." Miles says and I smile at him.

"Goodnight." My hands slip out of his and I go into my room quietly.

I smiled until I fell asleep that night.

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