And I would be the one (to hold you down) | Yandere Lily Evans

Louder

In the summers she's spent at Lily's house, Natsumi has moved from a cot next to Lily's bed, to sharing Lily's bed. It was easier when they were young and small, naturally, but as they grew older, it began to be a harder challenge to not fall off without wrapping themselves around each other: an action Lily embraced wholeheartedly, and an action that made Natsumi burn with sheepishness (was it weird? It was platonic, and Petunia was in the same room--).

Naturally, the following summer (the summer before their fourth year), Lily's father acquired her a queen sized mattress (much to the envy of Petunia, who was away at college anyways, studying business, which left them the room for themselves). With Lily being as cuddly as a bear, this did not stop her from curling up against Natsumi at every possible moment. Something that made the hot summers in the air conditioned-less room rather unbearable (no underage magic allowed in the house, what a stupid rule!!)

No one had remembered to give Lily the reminder, however, that the beds in the Ravenclaw dormitory would forever stay twin sized. No matter how much she snuck under Natsumi's covers and complained about the lack of legroom.

"We're all legs now, Nat! All of our growth went to our legs instead of our bosoms!"

The thought makes Natsumi giggle, because, well, so far it's true: growing into womanhood for them meant sudden growth spurts that made them taller than most boys in their year (including Severus, poor thing). She's not surprised because the women in her family tend to lack the curves of Western ladies, but also she was hoping the genes of her father might have appeared in more than just her eyes and hair...There's still time, perhaps. She's only fourteen.

"Then maybe you should sleep in your own bed?" She suggests, innocent, but missing her personal space.

Lily pretends to think about it, "Nah." She cozies up closer, and in the dark, Natsumi can feel her breath, "I like this better, don't you?"

She admits: there's an appeal to closeness like this. Sharing secrets and being nostalgic for the times they were eleven and doing the same. But...

"Don't you, Nat?" Her friend's voice carries a sharp edge to it, a glass teetering at the end of a table, about to fall. About to shatter.

"Of course, Lily." Natsumi answers automatically, knowing that if she left the girl hanging too long, she would get hurt by the lack of reply (or rather by the reply she gives rather than the one Lily wants to hear).

Lily smiles, even if she can't see it, Natsumi can feel it. Hear it in her voice, "Good."

.

The day Severus calls Lily a mudblood, three things happen.

One: Severus calls Lily a mudblood. It was an ugly word to begin with, but hearing it come out of Severus' mouth was shocking on an entirely different level. The word has no personal weight to Natsumi, but even she feels disgusted at having it said aloud anywhere near her. So she can only imagine how it felt when it slapped Lily across the face. She'll never be able to forget the emotions she expressed so openly. It'll be burned into her memory forever. Even Potter and his friends look shocked. Horrified on her behalf. Unsure if they should harden their assault on Severus or console Lily. Or perhaps just abscond from the situation altogether. It's a moment that keeps them all frozen in discomfort until Lily manages to move: she huffs, takes two steps towards Natsumi to grab her wrist and marches away, saying but one word, "Fine."

Two: Severus apologises profusely to Lily. Tripping over himself and even stuttering to get the right words out. Following her (and Natsumi by extension) everywhere on that day--Even to the girl's bathroom (he hadn't realized, and he was quickly scolded and escorted out). It all sounds so garbled and scrunched up together. Like an imitation of an apology. Lily scowls and tells him to fuck off in none too subtle words. Says to Natsumi that Severus hasn't ever apologized once in his life, and she doesn't expect a real one from him anytime soon. She says this with resolve and an air of acceptance. It doesn't prepare Natsumi at all for what happens next.