Assurgent: A Divergent Continuation

Chapter 3

Tobias POV

It's the day after I spread her ashes. My mind is fried and I don't have room for anything on it but Tris. I wander randomly and jump on a train, not even knowing where my destination is. But when the train slows down for a stop, I know where my feet were taking me: Navy Pier.

When the train arrives, I jump off and walk numbly to the base of the Ferris wheel. I start talking to myself, imagining I'm high up and she's with me. "Are you human, Tris? Being up his high... It doesn't scare you at all?"

I smile at the memory, but then my smile turns into a frown and the tears come yet again. I still feel a sinking feeling whenever I think about her; a weight, crushing my chest and leaving me gulping for air through my grief.

I sit there, silently crying, alone. Or, at least I thought I was alone.

"Tobias," someone says. I look up, willing it to be Tris. Even though that it's impossible....

"Christina?" I say.

"Yeah," she responds. "Reminiscing?" she asks.

I nod. She pulls out a notepad from her bag. I think she came to help me feel better. She rips off a few pages and says, while handing the pages and a pen to me, "Write it down. I'll help you relive the moment."

I look at her and say, "Thanks."

"Anytime... I miss her, too.... You know? You lost your love...and I lost my best friend." She says, sniffling. "And I have a feeling we can help each other through it."

I write down Tris's every word and my every word on this paper. When I finish, she puts her hand out and takes the tear-covered pages. "Just close your eyes. Pretend I'm Tris. You know what you say, right?"

I nod. I have it memorized. How could I not?

She nods, too, then starts climbing the Ferris wheel. I close my eyes, and feel like I'm actually there. I've relived this moment many times, but none have felt this real.

I hear the metal clang of the rungs as Tr- Christina, I correct myself, steps on them and I say, "Tris."

I picture Tris turning around on the Ferris wheel and I hear a voice say, "Yes?"

"I came to find out what you're doing." I state. Tris looks down at me and I take a moment to admire how beautiful she is.

"I'm seeking higher ground. I don't think I'm doing anything."

I smile and say, " All right. I'm coming."

I step up on the rungs and begin to scale them behind her.

"I'll be fine."

"Undoubtedly," I reply. "So tell me. What do you think the purpose of this exercise is? The game, I mean, not the climbing."

Tris looks down and I admire her cuteness for a second while she ponders a response. Her grey-blue eyes and beautiful, long, blonde hair. "Learning about strategy. Teamwork, maybe," she responds.

"Teamwork," I echo.

"Maybe not. Teamwork doesn't seem to a be a Dauntless priority." She is so perceptive.

"It's supposed to be a priority. It used to be."

"Now tell me..." I say, gulping for air, yet hiding my fear, "what do you think learning strategy has to do with... bravery?"

"It... It prepares you to act," Tris responds. "You learn strategy so you can use it.... Are you all right, Four?"

For a second, the name feels weird, like it's not supposed to sound like that. It's because she isn't saying Tobias.

"Are you human, Tris? Being up this high... It doesn't scare you at all?"

Tris tilts off to the side and I place my hand on her hip, steadying her. For a second, Tris feels weird and she turns into Christina. I can decipher it because I don't feel this bolt of heat and electricity course through me like I usually feel when I touch her. However, when I let go, I see Tris again. "You okay?" I ask Tris.

"Yes," she responds.

We reach a high point and Tris states rather than asks, "You're afraid of heights. How do you survive in the Dauntless compound?"

"I ignore my fear. When I make decisions, I pretend it doesn't exist."

Tris stares up at me. "What?" I ask.

"Nothing," she responds.

We look out at the city. The city is pitch- black, but even if it wasn't, I wouldn't be able to see very far. A building stands in my way.

"We're not high enough," she says. "I'm going to climb. I almost laugh. This is the best torture I've ever had. We climb and I say, "For God's sake, stiff."

"You don't have to follow me."

I don't. But I want to. But I will.

"Yes, I do," I respond.

I imagine my body plummeting, smacking into the bars as it falls down, and my limbs at broken angles on the pavement. But then I look up at Tris again and join her at the same height.

She continued to climb and she spots the flag. "See that?" She asks.

I stop climbing, look, smile, and say, "Yeah."

"It's coming from the park at the end of the pier. "

Then when Tr- Christina stops talking, I escape fantasy again and reunite with reality. Cold, hard reality. I break down in tears and Christina hugs me.

"I know it's hard. We'll make it through together," she says. She sniffles while I cry into her shoulder. Somehow, I doubt I'll be able to make it through.