Limerence |James Potter|

Twenty-Two

"I'm sorry that I hurt you, it is something I must live with everyday."

ϟϟϟ

Selene entered the Great Hall the next morning with a purpose in her step. She knew she looked good that day. Her peers can say what they like about her sleeping around, but the compliments certainly did something to her self esteem. Whether it was healthy or not was a different debate to be had. Her self-worth had certainly taken a hit since she began to sleep around. But, she looked good, and that was what she was focusing on right now.

In her pocket was an unreturned note. A note of poetry that James would use to serenade a girl who would return the feelings. Not Lily, and maybe not Selene, just somebody. James deserved to be happy and in love, even if was not with her.

She made her way down the aisle separating the Gryffindor table from the Hufflepuff table. In the middle was her target - James Potter - sitting with mutual friends - Remus, Sirius, and Peter. They were in the middle of the conversation, which halted when Selene approached.

"Good morning," Selene greeted cheerily. One of her hands was buried in her pocket, holding the paper to remind her of her purpose here. She would not focus on the way James' eyes lingered on her features. She would not focus on how she longed to hear his greeting in return, how much she loved hearing his voice. She would not focus on how this boy will inevitably be her doom. No, instead she would focus on repairing what they had and not focusing on what they could have. "May I steal James for a moment?"

Sirius was the first to chime in from the other side of the table, "Of course!"

"James was just saying how he needed to speak to you," Remus agreed, although his response lacked the flair of Sirius'.

James shot them both what Selene could assume was a glare before standing up. "I'll be back and if either of you steal my pancakes, you will know the alternative use for the Draught of Peace I have planned."

A panicked look crossed both of their faces and Peter, still quiet, was visibly sweating.

Selene would have laughed if she was not focusing on her mission.

She nodded at James, "To the hall?"

James let out a sound of agreement and they both made their way out of the Great Hall. Selene felt multiple sets of eyes following them, analyzing them. She had no doubt that their abrupt leave from breakfast would be the talk of the school for a day or two, but she did not care. She had a friendship to repair, partially so her comfort bear would stop making her feel guilty.

They entered the hall and it was busting with students trying to enter the hall, in dire need of breakfast. Selene shook her head, this will not do.

So, she gestured for James to follow her into an adjacent hall that was barren from the rush of students. No paintings lined the walls so they were truly alone.

"James, I want to apologize for acting in a way that made you uncomfortable. I never meant to get you involved. I was acting out, I didn't know how to process my feelings." Selene stumbled on the words, her hand on a death grip on the note in her pocket. With a shaky hand, she offered the note to James. "You gave this to Lily a few months back. You deserve to be able to swoon someone who will return your affections. I hope you find that."

James looked at her in silence. His hazel eyes eyed her up in a way that was soft but skeptical. With uncertain hands, he took the note from her hand. He unfolded it and read it to himself, his lips parting as he speechless read his words of poetry. He looked back at her with a glint in his eye that she could not place. "What about you? I thought you loved me."