Payback Hurts (Book ONE) ✔️

Pain Is The Game: Chapter 3 - All I Want Is Freedom (Dylan's POV)

Pain Is The Game
Chapter 3 - All I Want Is Freedom

   

(Dylan's POV)

I would do anything for her, I would give anything I own to make her happy, but this, this is something that made me think twice. 

Did she want to leave? To travel, as she put it. I didn't want to be hindering her. The last thing I wanted was for Cassie to feel like I intended to hold her back. But to travel off of this territory, let alone onto another Alphas for any reason, was terrifying to me.

"Cassie, this is very important. It might not be the best time for that." I said to her softly, not trying to anger her, but that was just as ineffective as anything. 

She jumped from her seat in anger and stood at her full height in a heated rage, her cheeks gleaming red as she scowled at me. "You can't just say no, Dylan! You wanted to know what it would take for me to forgive you? Then do this for me!" She went out of breath as she spoke, and I felt as though I could do nothing but admire her beauty, yet fear where her passionate attitude would get us. She was right, and I do want to do whatever I can to make her happy. But at the cost of possibly putting her life in danger? Is it really even worth it?

"Cassie, this request of yours-- it's not as simple as you'd like it to be. I can't just give you an answer to you 'traveling around the world with Je' because there are many things that have to happen in order for you to even leave--"

"Okay then, let's just do it, Dylan. What's so hard about letting me do this?" She shouted, and I felt the weight of each word she spoke. It was as though she was throwing them at me at full force, and trying to knock me out of my shoes with each blow. "I need this, Dylan! I've been on the verge of death ever since I set foot back in this place!" Her screams soon turned into cries, and my heart immediately ached at the weeps that left her throat. I stood and embraced her as she began to sob uncontrollably.

Cassandra, one of the bravest and strongest women I've ever known, was weeping in my arms, and for some reason, I felt her grow stronger as she released all of this, every last bit of the pain; and I was the cause of it. She has been in an endless cycle of depression since being here; all I wanted was for her to be happy, and yet all I could do was place her in this misery to begin with.

"Cassie... I am so sorry..." I whispered, but my very words didn't matter, and I realized that, the moment I spoke them. They were useless words; all I was meant to be here for was to hold her and to listen.

"Dylan," She sobbed, I pulled her back and looked at her pink, tear-filled face, and I gave her a napkin from her breakfast tray. She took it and whipped her face as her crying began to slow into steady hiccups. "I'm sorry for crying. I didn't mean to sound that desperate." 

I chuckled at her lightly, "Yeah, I can see why being in this room for four months would make you want to never come back here," She giggled at my lame joke, but her change in emotion relieved me. Maybe letting her release her anger and sadness is allowing her to see things better, at least I hope so. "Do you mind telling me about it? Why you're sad, I mean."

Cassie looked up at me as though I was a stranger that sneezed on her food, "I'm not sad!"

I held my hands up in defense and bowed back, "I'm sorry, 'sad' isn't the word that I meant, but it's the only one I can think of to describe how I think you're feeling." I know that what I was saying wasn't making much sense, but I've been working on my communicating skills lately, and this is a great chance for me to use those skills I've been learning to talk to my mate effectively. The last thing I need is for her to scream at me again. "But you said that you've been on the verge of death since you got here? What do you mean, Cassie?"

Cassie took a deep breath and looked up at me, "From fighting in the war to finding you after it to trying to cope with the fact that everything in my life has changed in less than a year; to even trying to wrap my mind around the fact that Victor and Je are mates and yet I'm stuck with--" She stopped herself and got up from her seat. She walked to her window across the room and remained quiet during that time. Was she going to say me? That she was stuck with me? Is that why she wants to leave? 

"You want to be free of me, don't you?" I asked, and my vision became blurry as tears built their homes on my bottom eyelid. As soon as I blinked, they migrated down my cheeks and to my chin. Why was I crying? I was the one who caused all of this. I was the one who hurt her; of course, I don't deserve happiness.

"That wasn't fair of me to say," she whispered.

"But it's true,"

"I already forgave you, Dylan. It's not just you. It's the memories I have here on this territory and with this Pack. It's the fact that after running away over two years ago and being here for about five months, I have yet to hear from any of my parents," she trailed off for a moment as she looked outside the window. "I have nothing here that's worth holding on to,"

Could it ever be me? Would I ever be worthy of her love? Is Victor the only man worth it?

"But I've been given a chance," she continued. "A chance to clear my mind and to reclaim a part of me that I've lost in all of this... chaos." She turned and looked at me, and she continued to speak. I watched life pulse through her blue eyes with each word she spoke next, "And I will not let anything keep me from finding that."

I believed her, and I respected it. I took a moment to bask in her aura and absorb my mates power and beauty. Goddess, she would make a perfect Luna for me; I needed it to be so.

"How about this, Cass?" I say, looking at her as I speak my next words as carefully as I could. "Come join me for the celebration tonight, stay for at least two hours, and then you're free to leave. I'll do what I can to get you a passport within a few days, but we will have rules set of what's expected of you while you're gone and how you'll be protected--" I stopped as she ran to me and hugged me. Woah what? Was Cassie hugging me? I didn't even get a chance to hug her back and enjoy it before she pulled away.

"Dylan, thank you so much!" she screamed as tears fell from her eyes. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Okay, well, don't get too excited. You still have to hold up your end of the bargain in order for this process to get started," I told her, I didn't want her to get so excited that she forgets everything I told her and doesn't show up to the party. But Cassie began ushering me towards her door.

"I got it, Dylan. Go to the party, stay for two hours, then I'm good!" Okay, so she was listening. Cassie pushed me over the threshold. And grabbed the door to close, but I stopped her right before she could close it.

"And please, could you wear something nice? I won't send anything over, but just not your usual pajama outfits?" I asked, and Cassie groaned. Agreeing to dress appropriately and slamming the door in my face. I smiled from ear to ear; I was going to fix everything for us, Cassie, I promise.

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[ author's note ]

Hi guys, so this chapter is short, but it got here pretty quickly! So Cassie has finally put it out there to Dylan that she needs some space and wants to stretch her legs! Where do you guys think Cassie and Je should go on their trip? Also, I wanted to let you all know that I will be moving Pain Is the Game into its own separate book here on Wattpad once I have posted the first five chapters here! After this chapter, there'll be two more before we get into the good and juicy chapters I have to follow! See ya'll soon!

Love,

Leilani