Anastasia

A Deeper Look

"Lady Sofia admired my new hair-style last night. It looked wonderful, thank you, Catherine," Anastasia said to the maid when she came to dress her the next morning.

"I only hope it worked, m'lady."

Anastasia frowned. "I shan't pretend I don't know what you mean. But in any case, I'm afraid I do not know, for I didn't look to see."

"Which of them do you like best, m'lady?"

"Well I - " Anastasia stopped. Had she paid any attention to the Whitby brothers? Of course she had, but not in that sense. "I don't know. Oh dear, I'm certainly not a good source of gossip, am I?"

Catherine looked appalled.

"Oh, Catherine, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to suggest -"

"It's alright m'lady, I know what you meant."

"Sometimes I feel like you're the only friend I have left in the world, Catherine," Anastasia sighed, staring out the window. It was a particularly chilly and overcast morning. She tried to see the beauty of it - roof tops and chimney tops, busy and bustling streets, fashionably-dressed women's boots clacking on the pavement. She tried, but failed. It could never compare to the country.

"What about Lady Adelaide? You seemed to like her."

"How did you know that?" Anastasia was genuinely puzzled. She hadn't mentioned Adelaide, had she?

Catherine flushed. "The footmen aren't sworn to secrecy."

"Naturally. Yes, I liked Adelaide very much. She is...different."

"How so, m'lady?"

That's an interesting question, Anastasia thought. "Once again, the answer is that I do not know. But it is something I hope to find out."

***

The London Season was incredibly busy. Scarcely a day passed without the Banks family hosting or having a dinner engagement. Balls, too, were often held and concerts and visits to the theatre or opera were so frequent they had begun to lose their appeal. Some days after the dinner party, the Banks dined at Viscount Ronden's London residence.

Mr. and Mrs. Shrewsbury were invited, as were Adelaide and her parents, to Anastasia's delight. Lady Adlington was disappointed by the absence of Lord Terbridge and Mr. Whitby, but took the opportunity to encourage Gregory Blake to speak with her daughter. This he did, and poor Anastasia was bored out of her wits by the time the meal had ended. She had little interest hunting, Mr. Blake's preferred topic, and he had little interest in the wonder and beauty of nature.

After dinner, the ladies went through to the drawing room. Anastasia immediately made to sit next to Adelaide, whom she had only spoken to once, when they arrived at the house, but Clarissa had already beckoned for Adelaide to join her. Left with little choice, Anastasia followed Adelaide and found herself in the middle of an unusual discussion.

"How do you like married life, Clarissa?" Adelaide asked after a few minutes of talking about the weather, the Duchess' choice of gown and the absence of Frederick Blake (who happened to be with Adelaide's brothers at some sort of gathering elsewhere in town). It was not an innocent question; Anastasia sensed something else in her tone - something she could not quite define.

"Oh, I like it very much." Clarissa smiled broadly. "I hope to host a party soon."

"Ah, yes, one of the many joys in life for a woman - playing the part of hostess." Adelaide glanced at Anastasia, raising her an eye brow. "Is it not, Lady Anastasia?"

"I - " Anastasia stopped herself, wondering exactly how she should respond. Adelaide was being a little impertinent, was she not, to be saying such things is such a way? Anastasia could not help but feel a little uncomfortable. Clarissa, fortunately, didn't seem to notice at all.

"For what could be better than receiving your husband's guests and being the dutiful wife?" Adelaide smiled sweetly at Clarissa. "You will be an excellent Mrs. Shrewsbury, Clarissa. To be so competent, organising parties and dinners. No doubt Mr. Shrewsbury will be extremely pleased with you."

Anastasia frowned at her friend and remained quiet for the rest of the conversation, only half listening to what Clarissa said in response. It wasn't until the gentlemen entered and Mrs. Shrewbury left them that Adelaide turned back to Anastasia.

"Really, Clarissa is quite the silliest person I have ever encountered. And so easy to manipulate too - it doesn't take much to sway her. A very poor representative of our sex, I am ashamed to say. Talking to such women frustrates me so - Lady Anastasia? Are you listening?"

Anastasia jerked herself back into the present. "Oh - I, er..."

"Are you unwell? You look rather pale."

"It's nothing, I assure you."

 "Very well. Now, do be careful, Gregory Blake is approaching you."

Anastasia groaned inwardly. Her parents were still quite adamant that Mr. Blake would be an excellent match for her. But Adelaide had given her something to think about. If she were to marry someone such as Gregory Blake, her life would be little different to that of Clarissa. Her future would be one of playing hostess and doing her husband's bidding.

That was certainly not what she wanted, however 'secure' a future it may be.

Gregory Blake did not stay long, as the guests made to leave soon after the gentlemen arrived. Anastasia still found the customs in Town a little odd, at home they would have stayed much longer, but tried to take it all in her stride and not feel to out of place, and in this situation she was certainly grateful she would not have to remain another hour or so trying to make conversation with the gentleman. Mr. Blake did remark something about Ronden House, whether she liked it or not, which worried her a little, for she wondered what motivated him to ask such a question. Fortunately, Adelaide replied before she could, saying the house was very comfortable, if not quite to her taste, a comment which evidently annoyed Gregory, who stalked off a few moments later without saying goodbye to Adelaide, but paying particular attention to Anastasia.

"Thank you, Adelaide."

"What for?" she asked innocently.

"You know very well what for."

Adelaide grinned her wicked grin that appeared whenever she felt a little mischievous. "I suppose I do. Do me something in return, will you, and promise me you won't ever consider Mr. Blake?"

Anastasia quietened and avoided Adelaide's gaze. "If only I could make such a promise. My - my financial situation will not allow me to do so." She hoped Adelaide would be understanding.

"Goodness! What has happened to you all of a sudden? You can't be so defeatist, it makes you look dreadfully weak. You'll join Mrs. Shrewsbury and all those other ignorant women sitting at home and producing heirs while the world-" Adelaide stopped, biting down on her lip. "I warned you about this, did I not? Allowing me to speak freely with you, that is. Do you wish change you mind?"

Anastasia stared in wonder at the girl in front of her. "Of course not, I only - "

"Only feel it your duty. To your father, your descendants, your ancestors..." It was clear from her tone that Adelaide was scornful. "I've heard it all before. Surely you can see you have a choice?"

"Well I - " Anastasia felt miserable. "I haven't made up my mind," she mumbled feebly.

Adelaide made a noise that sounded something like harumph. "Well, let us try and make it up then, shall we?"