Caramel Popcorn

Chapter 7: Jamie, Ginger, Bethany, Claire

Kissing him was odd. Weirdly not too awkward. He knew his way around. And he didn't push me away? I had been expecting that he would. If not a hard no, I was at least expecting some protest. But it didn't come. He just sank into my touch. He liked it. Whatever I felt didn't matter. Because this was about him. About a boy who was finally getting someone as soft as he'd always wanted. But someone who still had the courage to take what she wanted. I didn't have the authority to question the morality of it. What good was morality if it got you killed?

I tried to enjoy it. I didn't have to. But he'd catch on if I didn't feel it. So I tried to picture Ace. With his wild purple hair that still had hints of the previous blue at the roots. With his lean physique and freckled cheeks. And that one little tattoo of a hedgehog on his hip that he didn't like anyone seeing. The kiss deepened as I allowed myself to truly feel it.

My heart sank a little suddenly.

Ace would get it, wouldn't he?

He'd get that this was a part of the job. This was Jamie. But it somehow didn't feel that easy. It was still me kissing him. Irrespective of how I felt about it, it was still me doing all of this. Every little face-sucky bit of this was as much me as it was some made up person I was supposed to play.

I pulled away, feeling an uncomfortable heat. "I'm sorry--I don't know what I was thinking--" I spluttered, fumbling for the right words.

"It's not your fault--uh--that wasn't the worst kiss I've been ambushed with."

"Uh huh, I bet." I rolled my eyes at him.

"We could maybe continue that somewhere else?" He offered.

"Oh, uhm--I--I don't think that's a good idea. With your ex and all--"

"Yeah, no, you're right."

"I'm sorry I kissed you." I bit my lip, reeling him in.

"I'm sorry I kissed you back." He had an undeniable charm about him. He wasn't sorry and he wanted me to know that. Those really deep, sad, blue eyes. They annoyed me. People like him had this habit of fucking up and nobody held them accountable like they did. So it was all forgiven.

"I--I should go. That's enough economic theory for a bit," I said, getting to my feet.

"Sure, I'll see you around," he said coolly.

"Yeah, I hope so." I smiled and paid for my food before scurrying off.

I practically ran back to his dorm room. I had to tell someone and I sure as fuck wasn't going to tell Ace.

I knocked at the door impatiently before Drew opened it.

"You're back, hey, you're panting? Did you run? I didn't know you did that--"

"I kissed him." I blurted out.

"What?"

"I don't know why I did it--it was stupid but it felt like the right moment--"

"Alright, slow down, slow down-- you kissed Flynn?"

"Yeah,"

"Wow, that was quick." He grinned.

"I think it was the stress." I huffed.

"Yeah, stress. That's what we're going to call it." He nodded, looking at me a little concerned.

"What is it?" I asked, feeling the concern in his eyes grow by the second.

"You tell me," he said, sitting on the edge of his bed, while I paced around impatiently.