The Bet

Warmth

"Jiminie you have to go to school. It is not healthy to lock yourself up in this room just because of him!" Hobi hyung reprimanded.

I ignored him and turn my back against him, facing the wall while lying down on his bed.

I slept in his house yesterday because i have no strength to go at our apartment. I dont wanna stress yoongi hyung right now. I know he's been stressed out because of taehyung lately. I dont wanna be a burden anymore.

My eyes are puffy from all the crying i did yesterday. I can't accept it......accept that jungkook...... rejected me. I thought he would like me back..... i though.... i thought...... it's just a thought....

I layed my hopes too high, i expected too much.....what am i even thinking? Of course i should know now what his answer should be the moment i confessed.

I never knew......that i would feel this same pain again. I was hurt so much the last time i trust my heart to someone. And here i am, feeling the agony like as if i am in the past. Am i not deserving?

Everyone keeps leaving me behind..... they'll walk into my life and leave immediately once they realized that they are in the wrong place. They'll knock and leave something that will permanently hurt me.

Am i too open? Am i too forgiving? Am i too needy for love, to be loved? Am i being selfish? Should i change?

I am so engrossed with my thoughts that i almost didn't hear the closing of the door. The soft click ending my train of thoughts. I layed on my back, facing the ceiling, staring at it like there are stars looking down at me.

I heaved a deep sigh, a lone tear escaping my right eye as i closed it. The room was enveloped by silence, you can only hear the electric fan moving from left to right.

I feel so lonely......again. The nostalgic feeling when i havent met yoongi hyung yet. The nostalgic feeling when my parents left me.

"Mom....dad.....i hope you are alright there in heaven. I'm sorry if I'm disappointing you right now by staying in this damned quiet house. I know you dont wanna see me like this, but i just can't help it. I've been hurt and in pain when he left me. Now you left me as well. Why are all people leaving me behind?!" I trashed on the bed, grabbing the blanket with my fists and shoving it aside, exposing my legs, allowing the air to hit it.

I calmed myself and decided to stand up, recalling the events that happened yesterday. There it is again.... a tear was able to escape my eye even if im trying hard to hold it back.

I wiped it with the back of my hand and started fixing hyung's bed. I neatly placed the pillows on the headboard and fixed the crease of the comforter.

I took a bath afterwards and changed into my uniform. I dont want to go to school, but i considered what hobi hyung told me this morning. I can face him, can I? It won't kill me to attend another normal day.

I grabbed my bag and headed to the front door, locking it once i was out outside his house. I started trudging my way to the school, not bothering to take a cab, i'm late anyways there's no use of sweating myself just to get there.

Im walking down the side street, phone in hand, checking my notes for class when someone bumped into me, causing for me to stumble backwards, out balancing myself since the impact was hard. Seems like that person was running opposite my direction.

I was about to fall and land on my butt when his hand caught my hand and immediately pulled me towards him, hands on my waist. On instant, my arms gripped his biceps to stable myself.