Whore.

Chapter 16: Beaded

Sweat ran down my neck as I considered my position. What had happened? Did we have sex? Based on the power of my brain to block out the pain from yesterday, I couldn't fully trust my memories right now. For all I knew, we had done it several times and my psyche had blocked out the memories so I wouldn't feel guilty. Then I realized I was still wearing clothes. I exhaled in relief. I tried to pull away from him but I feared I might wake him up and have to deal with the awkwardness. So I stayed put. His warmth radiated into my back. This was actually really comfortable. I closed my eyes again. No point stressing out over nothing.

I woke up startled and looked around. This wasn't my room. I heard the sound of tooth brushing coming from behind. The fact that I was still in Swash's room meant that my memories from the middle of the night were not a dream. Unless this was an extended dream. I pinched myself. Yep, not a dream. I got up and sat down, looking into the bathroom. Swash wasn't visible, but I knew he'd just spat into the sink. I used my tongue to feel around my mouth. It tasted horrible. I should probably clean my teeth too. Maybe Swash also got me a toothbrush. He walked into the room and smiled at me. I didn't smile back.

"Good morning. Sleep well?"
"What happened last night?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why am I in your room?"
"Oh. That."

I frowned at him as he refused to say more, and was instead looking at me with a naughty smile. I didn't have time for games. He was probably just trying to get me to think the worst.

"Well?"
"You fell asleep in front of the TV."
"Yeah. So why didn't you leave me there?"
"You were shivering."
"And your best idea was to carry me here? Covering me with a blanket would have been easier."
"Trust me, I tried that."
"And what? I was still shivering?"
"We're on the seventh floor. It gets really cold up here at night. I'd forgotten to close the window. Trust me, it was freezing."
"So you brought me to your room."
"Hey, you only stopped shivering when I carried you. I thought maybe you needed the body heat."

I scowled at him. That was a really stupid reason to take someone to your bed.

"So why didn't you take me to the other room and put on the radiator?"
"Bringing you here was easier. The radiator would take time to warm you up and my room was already heated."
"Really."
"Besides, I placed you on the other side of the bed once you stopped shaking. It's not like I held you while you slept or something."

I wanted to tell him that he was cuddling in the middle of the night. Then I'd have to explain why I didn't push him away. I decided against it. If that's all he could remember, I'd leave it at that. I looked away from him and got off the bed. I could feel his eyes on me. I walked out of his room and into the living room. He was right. It really was cold in here. I shuddered a bit, rubbed my arms and walked to the bathroom. Sure enough, there was a toothbrush and a tube of Colgate. I brushed my teeth as I thought to myself. I had enjoyed sleeping in that position. What's wrong with me? I had a boyfriend already, and I felt sure Swash had something going on with Rodney. We had two different things happening in our lives, and this weird arrangement we had going on was only temporary. I spat out and rinsed the toothbrush, then walked back into the hall.

Swash was dressed in a crisp blue shirt, gray pants and work shoes. He busied himself knotting a tie as he walked out of his room. The outfit made him look older, significantly more mature. He was a working man. He had a five-year-old son. He made enough money to splurge on designer stuff for me. So why was there still that part of me that saw him as a high school jock?

"Hey, is my tie straight?"
"It's a little crooked. Move it a bit to the right."

He fussed with it a bit. Now it was too far right.

"A little bit more to the left."

He nudged it again and it was back in its original position.

"Too much. Push it right again."
"Can you just do it?" He sounded a bit annoyed. I didn't think he liked wearing ties. The corporate situation must have enforced it. I walked up to him, still feeling chilly from the cold, and rectified his tie. I watched his gaze on me as I moved it into place and tightened it. I stepped back once I was done.