Suicide

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Michelle POV

My friends and I all ate cookies and caught up on all the drama in their lives. The usual talk for the rich people in Texas. I decided to go home when they went out to party! I saw Alex's car.

I walked in the house to hear screaming upstairs. I ran upstairs to see Austin with a knife in his hand trying to stab himself while tears rolling down his face! He had a look of anguish on his face. Austin was screaming and fighting Alex. He said he wanted to die.

"Austin! Stop! Calm down! Everything is going to be okay! I love you! I won't let you do this! I won't!

"You have to! I hate myself! I want to die! I hate her! She ruined my life! I can't do this anymore! Alex was trying to stop him but he wouldn't give up. "Give me the knife, Austin. You can't do this. It won't solve any of your problems!"

Austin threw the knife across the room and Alex hugged him.Alex just saved my son's life. I never knew how Austin felt. I thought he was happy. I thought he enjoyed performing in different places with his favorite artist. I felt terrible that he couldn't tell me how he felt. I was his mom and I didn't realize how depressed he was. I couldn't believe he couldn't come to me and talk to me. He told me I was the most important person in his life, why couldn't he talk to me? I watched as Austin collapsed to the ground in fear with tears falling from his face. I ran to him and calmed him down. But, it was hard since I was crying too.

I couldn't describe the pain that I was going through. I couldn't bear to see him like that. Just to think about what was so bad that he could want to kill himself. He has millions of Mahomies who love and care about him. I couldn't imagine what would happen if he actually killed himself. He was the only reason some of them were alive and he killed himself they probably would too.

When I finally stopped crying, we drove to the hospital. Austin was crying the whole way and this was the worst feeling ever as a parent. I thought he told me everything. I thought that we were close. As a parent, to not know what you're child is going through that it gets that bad, is the worst thing ever. I could never imagine that Austin would attempt suicide. Austin wasn't the type of person to be depressing. He always had a smile on his face. He loved to laugh, he liked to make people happy, and his singing usually calmed him down. I never thought it would be him. Tears started streaming down my face and I held Austin's hand. I told him that I loved him. I couldn't describe the deep pit in my stomach. I realized it was the feeling of guilt. I wasn't there for me when he needed me. He was all I had left and he almost left. I almost lost the only person I cared about more than myself. He was my everything. I wasn't going to let him go again. EVER! I lost my husband and I couldn't deal with the pain of losing him too.

The hospital took Austin back right away. Alex started crying. I asked him what was wrong and he could barely reply.

"I ruined everything. I made him do this. I never thought it would get this bad. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry! I almost made him kill himself. I caused him to do this! I thought he wouldn't care. He told her to move on. She's my everything. But, he's my best friend. I can't make both of them happy. I hate myself. I can't believe this just happened."

"Alex you also saved him. You saved my son's life. I'm going to thank you every day for the rest of my life and he will too. I don't know what happened and I would like to know but you care about him. It sounds like you have to choose between a girl and your best friend. You can make the right decision. I know you can. You saved my son's life. You might hate yourself right now but you are a life saver. Thank you!"

Alex stopped crying long enough to tell me what happened. "Right after Austin left last year I fell in love with Jasmine after me and Sarah broke up. Austin came back and was going to propose. He loves her so much. He has told me that millions of times, over and over, since 6th grade. I just thought he gave up on her when he left. He told her to move on and me and her both thought that meant he didn't love her anymore. He blocked her number. He told her that she needed to stop waiting for him forever. Well, he came back and he was going to propose to her until he saw us kissing. He asked her to go on tour with him after high school is over but she declined his offer. She wanted to pursue her dreams of becoming a doctor and she wanted to stay with me. I told her she could go but she wanted to stay. Then, to rub it in his face she kissed me and he went crazy. He ran out crying."

I just kept listening. I knew it was killing him

"She didn't find out about him proposing to her because I saw the ring he dropped and I picked it up. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I didn't want to waste the ring and she deserves it. I love her. I don't have the money for that right now. My dad is living on unemployment money and the little money he has. I have a job but it doesn't pay good and I give 90% of it to my Dad for still living with him. She doesn't know either because she didn't see the ring first. I saw it and picked it up and acted like I had gotten it for her. I told her that my dad had found $1,000 last week at the beach. She said yes and we were planning on getting married and moving away. I don't know anymore. I can't imagine losing her. She's my everything but Austin loves her too and I would do anything for him."

"I know you can make the right decision, Alex. I don't care about that stupid ring. She does deserve it. But, you need to tell her that it was Austin's at first and you found it."

"Okay!"

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