Love at a Price (re-write?) - a GMW Joshaya fic

Four

I wake up feeling refreshed, despite the fear from last night creeping back in. I pull my mind away from all of that, focusing on the after, with Josh. I wait a moment, making sure that I'm not going to start spiralling, and then stretch out to grab my phone. A mild panic follows when it isn't there, so I pry open my eyes and find it on the floor. I don't know how it got there; maybe I pushed it off? I check the time and realise that I've slept nearly half of my day away. No wonder I'm so awake now.

I push myself out of bed, knowing that staying here much longer will completely destroy any chance of me doing anything remotely productive. I shower quickly, enjoying the feeling of the water rolling down my skin, lips mouthing along to my favourite songs. The music gets interrupted by rapid buzzing and I groan, poking my head around the shower curtain to stop it. Smackle's name light's up across my screen and I gasp, shutting off the water. I quickly dry my hand, answer, and send her to speaker so that I won't be fumbling with the phone around my wet hair.

"Hello, Maya," She greets timidly.

"Isadora Smackle, it's lovely to hear from you!" I chirp, hating that I sound insincere.

"I just wanted to say happy birthday for yesterday, and I'm sorry for not going to your party. I, um, I figured that my turning up might put a damper on the mood."

"Oh, not at all! No, it's a shame you didn't come, but it's okay all the same. Thanks for the birthday wish, but I do actually have to go – I was in the middle of a shower when you called." I respond light heartedly, starting to shiver behind the curtain despite the steam still billowing around me. She tells me goodbye and hangs up quickly. I set my music to start playing again, turn the water back on, and rinse out my hair.

I laze around in my bedroom, fingers dancing over the red brick, unsure of what to do with myself while Mom and Shawn are at work. As much as I hate it, school will a good time filler when it comes back. I've only got a few days left of mindless wandering around the apartment. Normally, I'd go straight to Riley, but it turns out that Farkle has decided to take her out today and I don't get to see her until late this afternoon. I try to kill time by drawing people out on the street outside my window, but quickly get bored and give up. I make an attempt to deep clean my bedroom, but there isn't anything that I want to get rid of so I just end up shifting my pillows and guitar around for five minutes.

I sigh loudly, pacing back and forth throughout the apartment and do something crazy. "Hi, Josh!" I greet when he answers his phone. "What're you up to?"

"Hey, not much. Just turned in a paper and now I'm looking for something to kill time. You?"

"Nothing, I would be with Riley, but Farkle..." I let my voice trail off and see if he'll suggest something.

"Did you... maybe want to meet up somewhere? I've got tickets to MoMa for today, and my friend just bailed out on me because of school, would you be interested?"

Then he suggests we meet up sooner, maybe get some lunch and make a full day of it, which I easily agree to. I quickly change to look more put together, deciding on a thick plaid coat that ends mid-thigh, over top of basic jeans and a cute long-sleeved shirt. I'm just finishing running a straightener through my hair when a jaunty knock startles me, and I rush to unplug it before racing to the door.

"Hi," I grin, Josh stepping inside as I tug open the door. I quickly take in his appearance, "You look really nice."

He smiles, stepping aside so that I can shut the door, "And you look... beautiful."

My smile broadens, though I can't help but to roll my eyes. "Thanks. I'll just grab my stuff and then I'm sorted."

He nods and leans awkwardly against the door, tugging his jacket into place. I take a second to breathe as I walk into my bedroom, feeling my stomach twisting out of anticipation. I know that I'm happy with Josh, so happy that I sometimes regress into a girly fit of giggles and immature humour, and while that's great, I don't want that to be the entirety of our time spent together. I've gotten better since our trip to the ski lodge last year.

It's crazy – in just a year our entire dynamic seems to have shifted. Last night, we held hand walking home, he held me when I broke, and he kissed me before he left. Yes, it was just on the cheek and while it's insignificant to some, that tiny gesture meant the world to me. Thinking that all of that may change, whether it's becoming closer or drifting apart, is undeniably scary. I exhale, turn around clutching my bag, and leave the building beside Josh.

"Right now," I hum quietly as we walk, "We are only two years apart."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. It leaves me wondering, are you going to stop spending time with me after your birthday?" I try to pass it off as a joke, but I'm sharing a genuine insecurity with Josh and I hold my breath as I wait for his answer.

"Don't count on it, Maya. Long game, remember? We live our lives, see what happens... Are you still okay with that?"

I nod, pushing against Josh's shoulder playfully as we stop outside a coffee shop. "Late lunch?" I ask, and he nods, guiding me inside.

After we've ordered and grabbed a coffee and a pastry each, we sit across from one another in a booth near the back. I set my drink to the side, not loving the idea of burning my mouth and carrying on like an idiot around Josh, so I decide to make some small talk. "So, what was it that you handed in today?"