Blood in the Water (Sequel to Such a Softer Sin) [COMPLETE]

Blood in the Water 11

This is where things are majorly canon divergent. I'm making up the timeline and I'm aware they try to take out Papa Joe the day after the poker game, but this is my shit and I'm making it up as I go along now in order for my story to work. If you're here for a strictly canon fic, you're in the wrong place. I warned you from the start. I hope you guys like this. Or not...since bad shit happens, but ya know... :')

Warning for intense feels and sadness.

You guys are gonna hate me after this one but there's a reason for everything, just push through it loooool

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It had been one whole month since Lila heard from the boys, a fucking month. She had been worried mercilessly about them, watching the news with a pit in her stomach as she heard about every time they righteously rid Boston of more vermin. They hadn't called, they hadn't got a hold of her at all and she felt sick with worry. Worry they would get themselves killed, worried they'd never come back, worried she would never see them again. She couldn't feel them, of course she couldn't with them not by her side. It was all gone, the only reminder of their presence in her life was the painful burning hole in her chest and the baby in her belly. Her sickness had eased off, but she was around 11 weeks pregnant now, and the boys were just gone. Murphy had said in his letter that he hoped one day they would come back for her, and she tried to hold onto that hope like it was the only thing keeping her breathing.

As the month wore on, the worry and pain turned to blind rage. Rage at being left behind, at the boys for not bothering to let her know if they were even okay or not. It was like they didn't care anymore. She understood why they had gone, why they were doing what they did, of course she did. But the time after their first real hit, how worried she had been, Connor had promised her, her place was by their side, and nothing would change that. And then he came up with the idea to fucking leave her. Now she couldn't tell them she was carrying their child and she had to do this alone, worrying every day that they would turn up on the news, captured or fucking dead. When she shared that dream with them, it had let her feel the burning need to act on the calling God had given them, she knew without a doubt they had to do it. But she didn't sign up for this shit. To just be left behind in the dirt like a used ragdoll and knocked up. It was one thing for them to be out risking their lives, it was a whole other thing to be abandoned completely.

Lila had thrown herself into work to take her mind off things, she needed to keep herself busy. The patrons of the bar knew something was going on. The boys and Rocco were never there anymore and Lila was a shell of her former self. She never smiled, not once. And every time the news came on in the pub she went rigid, like she was expecting to hear the worst news she could ever receive. The regulars there just knew, they didn't know how but they knew the Saints were the boys, and they were glad. The city needed fucking cleaning up and they couldn't think of more righteous boys to do it. But it hurt them all to see the aftermath of it, what it had done to the redhead that used to be so fiery and happy. She was just empty now. Aileen was worried about her, she would call a cab every night to make sure she got home safely and sometimes pop in to see her at the loft during the day. She wasn't looking after herself. Aileen had to tell her to shower and even brush her hair for her sometimes when it ended up a tangled mess. The older woman was severely worried about the girl's mental state, especially since she was now with child.

After Lilas shift that night, she went out for the cab but it wasn't there. She waited in the cold for about five minutes before she huffed. She started walking. She wasn't about to wait around forever and she didn't want to go back in the pub and ask about it. She was sick of the looks of pity everyone gave her when she was there. It had become common knowledge that she was pregnant, and with the twins gone and the people knowing what they were doing, it was obvious she was left alone to care for herself and her unborn baby. The air would do her good anyway. She was almost home, she could see the building and she pulled her jacket around herself to fight off the cold. But suddenly she was grabbed from behind and a hand clamped down on her mouth. She tried to scream but it was muffled as she was dragged into an alley. Suddenly something hit her in the head and everything went black.