Undateable

Thirty-Six

Kaia's POV

I don't think I'll be able to face anyone ever again. I feel so embarrassed. I wish the earth would open up and swallow me whole. I've been so tempted to buy the first ticket out of the US and to any deserted country to avoid facing another soul ever again.

How could I go back to school? The first guy I ever liked just left me out in the cold saying we can't date anymore. My emotions are all over the place. I don't know if I feel angry, sad or stupid. The small part of my conscious is laughing at me, singing 'I told you so' in a mocking melody. It's telling me that this is why you never dated before and yet you did it anyways. I feel humiliated, stupid and reckless.

What's worse is... I really like Cade. And I still like him. I don't get it. Nothing makes sense. He acts like he wants to break up with me, then he shows how much he cares, he gets jealous, tells me stay with him and then out of the blue, breaks up with me. I never met anyone so inconsistent with their emotions in my life. And I live with Kieran.

It's like he can't even decide whether he wants to like me or whether he hates me. He seems more confused than me. Does Cade have multiple personalities? That would make a lot of sense. "Let's go homewrecker," Vivian says as she walks pass me and out of the house. I shake out of my trance and pout as I follow behind her.

Ever since Cade punched Ben at the party, the party got weird. People either went back to their usual self, people got uncomfortable and some people left. Regardless, after what Cade did, the mood of the party changed immediately. Vivian, naturally, blames me. I thought we got over the hatred but nope.

I get into Vivian's car and I look out the window. Vivian doesn't say anything. She starts the car and drives. Why did Cade break up with me? I don't get it. What happened in that small amount of time? Does he just want to be my friend? Is that what he wants? Did he find out that he didn't like me like that? Something's off and I can't put my finger on it. Ever since I've dated Cade, I always questioned him... maybe I was right to do so?

"Are you having a mental monologue right now?" Vivian grumbles.

I frown. How did she know? I look at her with a quizzical expression. "I don't know what you are talking about," I say carelessly.

"You've been frowning and looking off at the distance ever since breakfast," Vivian states. She noticed that? "What's wrong? Are you really sad that you ruined my birthday party?" she asks.

I groan. You've got to be kidding me. I couldn't get a rat's butt about her stupid party. Also, it wasn't ruined because of me. "I still don't understand why you think that was my fault," I scowl at her.

Vivian scoffs, "Can you give me a reason how it wasn't your fault?" I can give you plenty.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because I wasn't the one who started the fight. Maybe because I wasn't the one who grabbed another girl roughly in the first place. Maybe because I'm not the one who invited Ben, who may I add, is notorious for hurting people. So yeah, I'm not so sure why you're surprised," I complain.

Vivian laughs, not humorous laugh but a mocking one. "That's funny because all the things you listed... if I recall correctly, you were involved in all of them."

"I did not invite Ben."

"So? You should've avoided him," Vivian says.

I growl, "Oh my God. You are the most selfish, most conceited person in the whole entire world. Are you fucking kidding me? You're seriously pissed off at me for a guy grabbing me and then someone defending me by punching him? You're such a baby," I yell.