#18 in TeenFic
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❝Don't,❞ he pleaded softly, offering her a tiny smile, ❝please don't make me a promise you will never be able to keep.❞ He released a quiet but deep breath, leaning forward even more, tilting his body towards her, until thei...
NICK stepped into the Winifred'sSchoolofEngineeringblock with an exhausted body and lifeless eyes on Monday.
He felt so, so tired. A kind of tired that went soul-deep and clung to his very bones.
He was too tired to even be feeling grief. There was just this alarming numbness that he had engulfing him from all sides. So drained of emotion, yet so heavy to the brim with all that emptiness -- if that even made any sense.
On his way to the locker, someone bumped into him roughly, no doubt out of blatant ignorance and carelessness. They didn't apologise and just walked away. But Nick didn't do anything, didn't say anything, didn't so much as turn around and glare in the direction of the asshole -- he couldn't.
Last week, he would've. Today, Nick's body was just aimlessly floating about, feeling like a paper bag drifting through the air and being tossed every which way and that.
"You look like shit," a familiar voice remarked, and Nick raised his head as Dale appeared in his direct line of sight.
Nick met Dale's eyes. "I feel like shit." This was probably the first time he's ever admitted to how he was feeling, voiced out even a sliver of the shit-storm raging inside him -- and it was obvious too, in the way Dale faltered in his steps and blinked twice.
"Did... Did something happen?" Dale asked in cautious tone, lifting a hand to scratch the side of his head.
"Nah," Nick shrugged, "just sleepy, is all."
"So you're not getting sleep then?" Dale pointed out, reading between the lines, hearing what Nick said and what he couldn't.
Nick just shot him a half-hearted glare, shuffling on his feet. "I'm okay," he muttered, averting his eyes. "Stop worrying."
"I always worry," Dale mumbled under his breath.
"Worrywart," Nick snorted, lips twitching at the corners and chest flooding with warmth.
"Jackass," Dale returned with a shrug.
"Dork," Nick reached forward and flicked Dale's nose, unable to help himself.
"Hey--!" Dale took a step back in surprise and slapped Nick's hand away, "that shit actually hurt."
Nick chuckled lightly, and stuffed his hands into the side pockets of his jeans, the sound eventually dying as the hollowness settled back in. This was how it was always going to be for him, he realised. Fleeting moments of innocence. Glimpses into the life he could have had. Temporary relief; ghosts of laughter that got cut off way too early; the death of smiles before they could ever fully bloom across his face. The severing of strings between his heart and anybody else's, before any real connection or bond could be created.
