vanilla // lrh

thirty six

***hehe enjoy :*

"We should get out of here."

"Don't change the subject. I don't want to go anywhere with you. I can't believe you'd do-"

"Ellie, look," He said, and he raised his arms for me to see, clenching both of his fists in front of me.

"You know what my knuckles look like after a fight. Do they look like that now?"

"No, but that means nothing. Sawyer says that he was kicked."

"Don't you think he would have recognized me?"

"He said they had a mask on. If it was someone he didn't even know why would they bother with a mask."

"So he couldn't go to the police. Is there any way I can prove to you that I didn't do this? Why would I want to do something I know would end any chance of you ever wanting to speak to me again."

"Because that's just what you do, Luke. You act out of rage. You don't calm down and just think about something before you do it."

He smiled at me, shaking his head. "What am I doing right now?"

"I don't trust you." I admitted, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Let me fix that." He said, reaching for my hand, and holding it in his.

"How?" I said, allowing him to hold onto my hand, but avoiding eye contact.

"Ask me anything. I'll tell you anything you want to know."

'Anything?" I confirmed.

"Absolutely anything. But can we go sit? Standing on your knees isn't so comfortable, I don't know how girls do it all the time."

"No jokes right now!" I exclaimed, fighting back a giggle.

He stood from the floor and lead us over to the couch, without releasing my hand.

"I want you to know that I've never lied to you. I never will lie to you."

"That could be a lie in itself." I said, bringing my knees to my chest and releasing his hand from mine.

"I guess you're right. You might just have to trust in me." He sighed, shifting his body slightly away from me. He looked disappointed that I let go of his hand.

"Tell me everything that's on your mind, I promise to you that i'll understand." He breathed, gently. He was surprisingly calm.

"I'm Ashton, Luke. We're exactly the same. His bad habits are just more obvious but I fall back into mine. It's you. Guys like you. People like you."

"You are nothing like Ashton." He shook his head.

"Really think about it. What makes me different than him?"

"You don't know your own strength, Ellie. You are so strong and if only you knew it nothing could ever stop you. Ashton is incredibly weak, he relies on a bottle to make him forget how sad he is instead of facing any problems himself. You always face things head on. Who's idea was it for us to stop running from someone and fight back?"

I was strong?

I never thought of myself as a strong person. But maybe I was. Maybe ending my relationship with Alec and moving states was strong, maybe not allowing Luke to walk all over me was strong, maybe I was.

"If I was so strong why do I fall into the trap of people like you? I get so addicted to the bad boy kind of guy, one I know will never be what I want him to really be."