You're my Hanahaki Flower - Jeon Jungkook

¤ 17 ¤

¤ First day after the incident ¤

"Mimi talk to me please!" Jungkook begged as he ran after her as soon as he saw her walk into the street they would usually take to school together.

He hadn't waited for her by her house, because he knew she wouldn't have come out at all then. He had continuously called and texted her even going as far as to call their home phone but, without success.

"Mimosa, you won't even let me explain will you?!" Jungkook stated slightly in an accusing tone as he grabbed her arm and made her look at him.

The said girl bit her lip to prevent herself from screaming at him, "Please stop the smiles, stop looking for me, forget our talks, everything and please let me forget you Jungkook."

"Have you come to detest me so much that you won't even look at me anymore?" Jungkooks voice clearly turned hoarse, and in that split second that she glanced at his expression, she noticed how broken it was.  Without having to do anything for it she felt her own heart reach out to him in the most painful manner.

"Is what I did really that unforgivable for you Mimi? Are you really going to cast me away because of that?!"

"Be strong Mimosa, you've to care for yourself because right now you can't be next to him properly without hurting yourself and him. You can't be of any help for him right now."

She noticed how Jungkooks grip on her wrist became slightly loose when he got no reaction and was about to slip her arm away, just when he said the most simple words but also the ones that had the most impact on him.

"How can you hate and throw me away over such a simple matter Mimi?" Jungkook stated in a broken voice, and the tears immediately pooled into her eyes.

"Oh how much I wish to tell you that it's the total opposite. I love you so much that I'm afraid that I'll lose myself." She looked up at him only to be shocked by the tears in his eyes and startled she retreated her arm from his grip.

Without wanting to see anything else or wanting to be in his presence even more - she felt her own determination waver as she saw his broken state - she ran away from him.

"Why are you crying?!" Jungkooks angry but also sad voice reached after her as he stayed there feeling hopeless. "I should be the one crying!"

"Because I'm weak, pathetic and because I love you."  She had to prevent herself from screaming at him and instead sped up even more, wanting to get away as far as she could. 

It had been difficult enough to explain at home about their situation but coming across his mother in the supermarket, and hearing her worry had broken something inside her. She hated lying to his mother who treated her like one of her own, but this time she had made up an excuse for the sake of both of them. In fact, only Jungooks older brother knew about his disease, as he had not wanted to worry his parents.

"I'm sorry for being selfish but this is better for both of us..."

¤ That day at school, lunchtime  ¤

"Hey Mimi," Yeonji softly nudged my side as we walked into the cafeteria with our lunchboxes in our hands. "Wanna sit by the window?"

I was about to answer her but at the same time, I unknowingly let my gaze wander around and made eye contact with Jimin, who's expression brightened when he saw us.

Just as I expected he immediately nudged Jungkooks side who - albeit with a hollow expression - did look up and turned his head towards our direction. 

"A seat by the window sounds good!" I hurried to say as I averted my gaze, and dragged Yeonji along to the furthest away seat from them.

I knew Yeonji had witnessed the exchange but she refrained from saying anything, already having been informed about what had happened between me and Jungkook that morning.

"I know I shouldn't be saying this..." Yeonji carefully and softly stated, and I already knew which topic she was trying to start about.

"He looks like shit," I mumbled as I buried my face in my hands. "I know. I know better than anyone else."

I heard a soft sigh escape Yeonji's lips before she placed her hand on my head and gave me a reassuring pat...

Soon after that first encounter, Jungkook knew it was no point in talking to Mimosa unless she herself decided she wanted to. He expected her to come around and patch things up with him in three days but much to his shock she didn't.  

A week passed and she had neither texted him nor looked at him. Something that hurt and saddened him deeply. Mostly because he knew that even if he approached her now, she would only distance herself more and also because he didn't understand if what he did was really that bad. Rendering him to a hopeless position. 

Hyeri - and also the boys - who stayed by his side during everything watched everything with a sad and guilty feeling. They noticed how meticulously good Mimosa was at avoiding and ignoring Jungkook- maybe due to their years-long friendship. They also witnessed his mood and condition worsening drastically. This let to Hyeri deciding to step in as a mediator. She contacted Mimi through Yeonji, who was - much to her surprise, quite willing to work along and they decided to meet up during a short break inbetween their lessons...

"Mimi!" Hyeri called out as soon as she saw the said girl walk out of the door into the backyard of the school, where they were permitted to hold breaks and eat lunch. 

"Hey," Her greeting looked a bit tensed and unlike her usual self, there was no life in her eyes left. "Why did you want to speak to me here?"

Hyeri had slightly expected her to go straight to the point, yet she was still taken aback. Obviously, if Mimosa wanted to avoid Jungkook, she wouldn't want to be in her  - Jungkooks friend - presence for too long either. But she had expected her to at least ask how she was doing.

"It's okay Hyeri, you're not here for yourself right now." Hyeri mentally calmed herself down, and waited for Mimosa to have sat down a bit comfortably.

"You probably - deep down, already know what I want to talk about," Hyeri replied as she felt herself get nervous too. What if she got extremely mad at her for meddling into their business? 

"Well let me guess," Mimosa's tone was slightly sarcastic but other than that she didn't seem angry nor shocked. "Jeon...Jungkook."

"You're not angry right?" Hyeri questioned once again being the one to be taken aback.

"Why would I?" For the very first time during their conversation, something like a smile played on Mimosa's lips. "This actually only confirms that all of you have the wrong idea about the problem between me and Jungkook."

"What do you mean?" Hyeri cocked her head to the side, brimming with curiosity.

"Al of you believe I'm mad at Jungkook for not telling me about the fact that he let you guys in on our secret." She seemed to purposely put the narrative on 'Our' but still continued on smoothly. "Of course at first I was shocked, then I was mad but soon it turned into hurt. This all happened in the span of those ten minutes I stayed there in that alley."

"Then why?" Hyeri couldn't seem to grasp Mimosa's line of thoughts and it clearly showed in her expression. 

"Why I put this distance between us? To protect me." Mimosa looked her straight in the eyes and for the first time, it felt like Hyeri had a real peek at what the other girl was feeling. And the sad feeling in her eyes struck her harder than she expected.

"If you're protecting yourself? Who's going to protect Jungkook? You threw him out like a sailor in the open sea."

"The one he needs is going to protect him, and that's not me. It can never be me Hyeri, I've come to understand that long ago..." 

"Don't tell me?!" Certain things suddenly started making sense in Hyeri's head and the whole big picture clicked together for her.  "She doesn't know, she doesn't know for god's sake!"